goodbye mother.

[Razorguns]

Speaking of, where's Bikinimom lately???? I miss her 10 paragraph replies.

r

 

[Sweetasfrank]

I was estranged from my father for a few years till he got sick. I got back in touch with him and he was still the same old a**!
The bad new is i've resigned myself in the knowledge that he will never be capable of properly communicating his love for me as a father. The good news is that i know in some twisted way he did and still does love me..
Although the words that come out of his mouth aren't always what a child wants to hear, his actions definitely speak louder in more ways than he'll ever admit.
He's stubborn as fuck when it comes to accepting he's wrong/apologising, which kinda sounds like your mum...but rather than give him the benefit of arguing over it, it's better to take that with a pinch of salt and know that deep down somewhere, both he and i know who was in the wrong...that works for me. And it's far more satisfying. As frustrating as it is, it's hard to change someone who is so set in their ways, and sometimes trying to fix it causes more damage..

 

[SpyWizard]

my mother, the size 4 plastic surgery princess, who is sometimes a wonderful person, and most other times, a controlling, judgemental, overly opinionated woman, insulted me so badly on friday that I can't see how I can talk to her again.

I was on my way home from work and I called her, like i usually do.
I told her about a presentation i made that went well and she was impressed. Then i told her i'm worried about the financial stability of my company, and she got very very worried. Then i told her that a friend of mine got a job at johnson and johnson and it sounded so great. I said it's not near me, but i'm just going to look for a new job and hope that I find one before something happens to this one.

My mother said, "(long sigh)... you can't work at J&J."
I said, "Well i wasn't going to, but why not?"
(another long sigh, and then a pause). "Stilleto. (another long pause). J&J only hires.... very young, thin, attractive people."

i said, "and?"

my mother said, "You are none of those things."
i hung up on her, then didn't take her calls. She wrote me later to tell me it wasn't said to be mean- she said it because she cares.

The whole thing has gotten me very very sad. not because of the actual insult, since i know she's wrong, but because that's my MOTHER saying that. i didn't even ask her- she just felt I needed to know so badly that she felt it was her duty as my mother to let me know she doesn't think i'm hot.

i can't speak to her again. i don't want to see her and I certainly don't want to ever tell her anything anymore.
that's what has gotten me sad- the loss.

hmmm... only read this post so here goes...

mho..

I think you and i are close in age, i assume our mom's are close in age as well... mine is passed away this last 1.5 yrs... I know you are younger.. but..

My mom would have said the same thing, she wants to protect you, they often ask themself a question.. "why will this not work"??

rather than, "what can i do to make this work" this was something that took me some 12 years to teach her, a simple thing really..

All she wanted to do is protect you from rejection.. did she do a good job?? no, have you punished her enough by rejecting her by not calling??

we don't need to punish them, when you let her know that if she meant to or not, she hurt you dearly, she will beat herself up way more than you can ever do.. so, we only have a short time with our parents, don't regret your life, or your decisions..

hope that helps..

 

[cindylou]

hmmm... only read this post so here goes...

mho..

I think you and i are close in age, i assume our mom's are close in age as well... mine is passed away this last 1.5 yrs... I know you are younger.. but..

My mom would have said the same thing, she wants to protect you, they often ask themself a question.. "why will this not work"??

rather than, "what can i do to make this work" this was something that took me some 12 years to teach her, a simple thing really..

All she wanted to do is protect you from rejection.. did she do a good job?? no, have you punished her enough by rejecting her by not calling??

we don't need to punish them, when you let her know that if she meant to or not, she hurt you dearly, she will beat herself up way more than you can ever do.. so, we only have a short time with our parents, don't regret your life, or your decisions..

hope that helps..

I think she should forgive her mother, yes; But there is no excuse for this kind of behavior. None. I wouldnt go out of my way to get myself hurt again if I was her. She does not have to be close with her mother ; but she neednt be totally estranged either.

 

[jackangel]

Does she know you're an Elite Mod? Mother better recognize.

 

[redsamurai]

i see them every day!

fine, lucky you..........but when are "we" going to see them again?

 

[redsamurai]

Does she know you're an Elite Mod? Mother better recognize.

I didn't think about that, it was a "bantable" offense afterall.......

 

[ortiz34]

Sorry to hear about that.
My father has said some nasty stuff to me that is crushing.

I can relate. ((hugs))

you're not alone, and I know it doesn't make it easier, because it sucks

 

[PICK3]

My mom once called me a Mo

 

[jackangel]

By the way, not all mothers are the same. Some suck hardcore. Mine is cool and would never say something like that, but whatevz.

Whatevz, you know?