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Excuses that dudes make for not getting laid

Lestat

Lestat

MVP
EF VIP
Lets hear some of the main excuses you hear your bros (or hos for you ladies) throw out when they explain why they didn't want to or just plain didn't get laid.

1) I prefer quality over quantity
2) I can't just sleep with someone I don't know
3) its better when feelings are involved
4) i really like this girl, I don't want to rush it
5) I respect myself too much to have sex with someone I am not attracted to
 
dude I would never even have thought of any of those had you not posted them! thx man :beer:
gives me some new excuses should I ever feel like being a pussy with women
 
4. I really didn't like that girl, anyway (after being rejected).
3. I had something else lined up.
2. I didn't have any protection and couldn't risk knocking her up.
1. My name is Lestat...lol. Just joking.
 
HeatherRae said:
4. I really didn't like that girl, anyway (after being rejected).
3. I had something else lined up.
2. I didn't have any protection and couldn't risk knocking her up.
1. My name is Lestat...lol. Just joking.
Click to expand...
#3 is legit I think...i mean, if I dont have a hefty bag,bottle of crisco and a large rubber band handy I wont even talk to girl
 
Wulfgar said:
#3 is legit I think...i mean, if I dont have a hefty bag,bottle of crisco and a large rubber band handy I wont even talk to girl
Click to expand...
LOL...an entire trash bag huh?
 
Lestat said:
Lets hear some of the main excuses you hear your bros (or hos for you ladies) throw out when they explain why they didn't want to or just plain didn't get laid.

1) I prefer quality over quantity
2) I can't just sleep with someone I don't know
3) its better when feelings are involved
4) i really like this girl, I don't want to rush it
5) I respect myself too much to have sex with someone I am not attracted to
Click to expand...


My friends usually say.

"Dude I was so drunk I couldn't get it up, but then again later I passed out and woke up naked so I might have fucked her."
 
I would have fucked her so hard her roommate would have had an orgasm, but her roommates a guy so I had to pass."
 
I have nothing to prove. If I wanna get laid, I'll get laid. Don't need to get laid so I can brag about it. Only little boys do that.
 
1) i got cockblocked by her friend!
2) i got cockblocked by her ex!
3) i got cockblocked by Golden!!!
4) i got too drunk
5) i wasnt drunk enough
6) i was going to, then i found out that xxxx fucked her first, and couldnt do it
7) my ex was watching
8) my sister was watching
9) my girlfriend was watching
10) Golden was watching, she wasnt hot, and he was ALREADY laughing!!
11) i had nowhere to take her!! (i love this one, when it comes from a guy who has had sex with randoms in parks, beaches, and once in a roundabout with cars going by the whole time :lmao: )
and by far the most common.......
12) she was a bitch anyway man

the stupidest i have heard was a guy saying that the girls asscheeks were different sizes :rolleyes:

they werent. i checked :) heehee ;)
 
how about

I just got laid last night

that has got to be one of the worst.
 
Lestat said:
how about

I just got laid last night

that has got to be one of the worst.
Click to expand...
i can understand that one, especially if last nights girl was a lot hotter than the new one, or you were in bed for the whole day and are simply sexed out
 
Lestat said:
Lets hear some of the main excuses you hear your bros (or hos for you ladies) throw out when they explain why they didn't want to or just plain didn't get laid.

1) I prefer quality over quantity
Click to expand...

what's the flip side to this? "I prefer quantity over quality", right?

Why the hell would anyone believe that??
 
I always find it funny that whenever Lestat starts a post, the following google ads appear:

Ads by Google Bi Guys Bisexual Guys Guys Gay Gays Guys
 
Lestat said:
Lets hear some of the main excuses you hear your bros (or hos for you ladies) throw out when they explain why they didn't want to or just plain didn't get laid.

1) I prefer quality over quantity
2) I can't just sleep with someone I don't know
3) its better when feelings are involved
4) i really like this girl, I don't want to rush it
5) I respect myself too much to have sex with someone I am not attracted to
Click to expand...


Okay, there are 2 groups of "excuses" here, as I see it.

Group 1:
Excuses # 2, 3, and 4. WHO THE HELL USES THESE?!! I have honestly never heard a man use these before. These are really bad excuses. Really, really bad.

Group 2:
Excuses #1 and 5. Haven't heard #5 too often, word-for-word, but both of these have the same foundation - "I don't need to fuck to get over my insecurities and impress my yuppy friends, a la the college years". Now, if these TRULY are being used for excuses, then that's sad. BUT, there IS such a thing as a man deciding to only sleep with upper tier females and not giving in to the biggest male insecurity of them all - "If my penis isn't in SOMETHING, then my friends will not think I am cool".

Either way, here's to warm vagina :cheers:
 
KillahBee said:
Okay, there are 2 groups of "excuses" here, as I see it.

Group 1:
Excuses # 2, 3, and 4. WHO THE HELL USES THESE?!! I have honestly never heard a man use these before. These are really bad excuses. Really, really bad.

Group 2:
Excuses #1 and 5. Haven't heard #5 too often, word-for-word, but both of these have the same foundation - "I don't need to fuck to get over my insecurities and impress my yuppy friends, a la the college years". Now, if these TRULY are being used for excuses, then that's sad. BUT, there IS such a thing as a man deciding to only sleep with upper tier females and not giving in to the biggest male insecurity of them all - "If my penis isn't in SOMETHING, then my friends will not think I am cool".

Either way, here's to warm vagina :cheers:
Click to expand...

Why does everything has to do with insecurities

or 8 balls?
 
I have deca dick and don't want to bother.

I heard she had the clap and don't want to risk it.

Both of these after seeing said friend sweat both girls so hard I thought he'd sign his car over to them.
 
Valid excuses for not banging chicks:

1) she's got an STD
2) you're already banging someone else at the time way hotter
3) you're gay
 
Lestat said:
Valid excuses for not banging chicks:

1) she's got an STD
2) you're already banging someone else at the time way hotter
3) you're gay
Click to expand...


#1 is bullshit. The gamble is half the fun
 
Lestat said:
Lets hear some of the main excuses you hear your bros (or hos for you ladies) throw out when they explain why they didn't want to or just plain didn't get laid.

1) I prefer quality over quantity
2) I can't just sleep with someone I don't know
3) its better when feelings are involved
4) i really like this girl, I don't want to rush it
5) I respect myself too much to have sex with someone I am not attracted to
Click to expand...

those sound exclusively like excuses a girl would use to not sleep with a guy
 
GoldenDelicious said:
1) i got cockblocked by her friend!
2) i got cockblocked by her ex!
3) i got cockblocked by Golden!!!
4) i got too drunk
5) i wasnt drunk enough
6) i was going to, then i found out that xxxx fucked her first, and couldnt do it
7) my ex was watching
8) my sister was watching
9) my girlfriend was watching
10) Golden was watching, she wasnt hot, and he was ALREADY laughing!!
11) i had nowhere to take her!! (i love this one, when it comes from a guy who has had sex with randoms in parks, beaches, and once in a roundabout with cars going by the whole time :lmao: )
and by far the most common.......
12) she was a bitch anyway man

the stupidest i have heard was a guy saying that the girls asscheeks were different sizes :rolleyes:

they werent. i checked :) heehee ;)
Click to expand...
4 is a reguler thing for me.lol I allways get to drunk.
 
LMAO!!! Great thread!

One of my best friends makes up all the excuses in the world for not talking to girls.. "All man, look at her, she's dressed like a slut.. Ah man, she's probably 16.. Ah man, you know she has some STD.. Ah man, she's too skinny for me, I like them thicker." But then he has the audacity to fucking hate on me RIGHT INFRONT OF THE GIRLS when I'm hollerin.. Talking about shit like 'ahh, come on Matt, you can do better than this broad." I'm like 'DUDE.. STFU, I'm actually trying to bang her mom, fuck!"

haha.. No, but this is a serious problem.. What's even worse is when YOU fuck a girl and then your boys are like "Ah man, she wasn't THAT hot.. Ahh, dawg, ANYONE could have fucked that drunk bitch... or Man, she just got out of a relationship, she would have fucked any penis" hahahahahahahaahah.. just kills me

T-Matt
 
dutchman063 said:
those sound exclusively like excuses a girl would use to not sleep with a guy
Click to expand...

Word. Guys will usually come up with:

- "oh I was too drunk"

- "I thought she was a coworker"

- "man I wasnt here to get laid, just to party"

- "couldnt, had an office meeting at 8am"

- "she was minor, I'm sure"
 
T-Matt said:
LMAO!!! Great thread!

One of my best friends makes up all the excuses in the world for not talking to girls.. "All man, look at her, she's dressed like a slut.. Ah man, she's probably 16.. Ah man, you know she has some STD.. Ah man, she's too skinny for me, I like them thicker." But then he has the audacity to fucking hate on me RIGHT INFRONT OF THE GIRLS when I'm hollerin.. Talking about shit like 'ahh, come on Matt, you can do better than this broad." I'm like 'DUDE.. STFU, I'm actually trying to bang her mom, fuck!"

haha.. No, but this is a serious problem.. What's even worse is when YOU fuck a girl and then your boys are like "Ah man, she wasn't THAT hot.. Ahh, dawg, ANYONE could have fucked that drunk bitch... or Man, she just got out of a relationship, she would have fucked any penis" hahahahahahahaahah.. just kills me

T-Matt
Click to expand...
lol! bro i try not to roll with those types, you see them all the time. A lot of dudes on EF are like that too. its jealousy, plain and simple.
 
T-Matt said:
LMAO!!! Great thread!

One of my best friends makes up all the excuses in the world for not talking to girls.. "All man, look at her, she's dressed like a slut.. Ah man, she's probably 16.. Ah man, you know she has some STD.. Ah man, she's too skinny for me, I like them thicker." But then he has the audacity to fucking hate on me RIGHT INFRONT OF THE GIRLS when I'm hollerin.. Talking about shit like 'ahh, come on Matt, you can do better than this broad." I'm like 'DUDE.. STFU, I'm actually trying to bang her mom, fuck!"

haha.. No, but this is a serious problem.. What's even worse is when YOU fuck a girl and then your boys are like "Ah man, she wasn't THAT hot.. Ahh, dawg, ANYONE could have fucked that drunk bitch... or Man, she just got out of a relationship, she would have fucked any penis" hahahahahahahaahah.. just kills me

T-Matt
Click to expand...
people are haters, so why would you even tell them about banging the girl... do you think they will respect you more for throwing your sexual act in their face?
 
I NEVER throw it in anyone's face.. They just know I close the deal.. We'll be hanging out at a club or bar and me and the girl leave and they know I'm not gay, I'll hit that shit..

I'd never throw sex in one of my boy's faces, shit, I was the fat fuck in HS and I didn't get any ass..

I hang with them b/c I can't find any dudes who AREN"T like that.. Shit, everyone in St. Pete is a fucking hater.. everyone thinks they are jeff lacey or winky wright.. if they don't get ass, you don't get ass and they want to fight.. it's fucking retarded.. It's all good though cuz I can go out by myself and pull more ass anyways.. :)

T-Matt
 
Lestat said:
Lets hear some of the main excuses you hear your bros (or hos for you ladies) throw out when they explain why they didn't want to or just plain didn't get laid.

1) I prefer quality over quantity
2) I can't just sleep with someone I don't know
3) its better when feelings are involved
4) i really like this girl, I don't want to rush it
5) I respect myself too much to have sex with someone I am not attracted to
Click to expand...


6) Stds.
 
KillahBee said:
#1 is bullshit. The gamble is half the fun
Click to expand...


Have you ever had an std? Do you care about your sexual health?

I'm sure you know some of them aren't cureable.












Oh wait you were kidding. :lmao:
 
needtogetas said:
4 is a reguler thing for me.lol I allways get to drunk.
Click to expand...


Same with me at school. I'd just zone out.
 
KillahBee said:
what's the flip side to this? "I prefer quantity over quality", right?

Why the hell would anyone believe that??
Click to expand...

I was on doing 300mg's a week of clomid and dude I was so emotional I couldn't just fuck her and leave.

We like chick bonded or something it was freaky.
 
if you've done any "online" dating as I have
"I'm too drunk"
shit
 
I havent heard any guys come up with excuses for why they havent had sex. Unless one dude was waiting on another to bang a chick (if your into that game stuff), I wouldnt see a reason for an excuse.

A good excuse though:

"i was saving myself for your future wife"
 
vansmack2000 said:
whiskey dick
Click to expand...
that's what i'm talking about
fuck this noise with girls making it "avaliable"
and you're supposed to take it
lose weight,fix your teeth,get educated,have some manners and act like I could bring you home to mother
many reasons for not having a child with a chick
 
seizer said:
I havent heard any guys come up with excuses for why they havent had sex. Unless one dude was waiting on another to bang a chick (if your into that game stuff), I wouldnt see a reason for an excuse.

A good excuse though:

"i was saving myself for your future wife"
Click to expand...
great line
 
the most common ones ive heard:

im waiting for the right time/woman
shes not hot enough
my dick's too big (i shit you not)
my dick's too small
i think im gay
 
If all the guys who made excuses for not laying a chick actually told the truth, every one of them would say the same thing:

"I didn't have enough game!"
 
My excuse is that I'm POOR. Ain't got the money to go lookin for chicks. Really, its true. (I'm trying to buy a house right now.)
 
KillahBee said:
Okay, there are 2 groups of "excuses" here, as I see it.

Group 1:
Excuses # 2, 3, and 4. WHO THE HELL USES THESE?!! I have honestly never heard a man use these before. These are really bad excuses. Really, really bad.

Group 2:
Excuses #1 and 5. Haven't heard #5 too often, word-for-word, but both of these have the same foundation - "I don't need to fuck to get over my insecurities and impress my yuppy friends, a la the college years". Now, if these TRULY are being used for excuses, then that's sad. BUT, there IS such a thing as a man deciding to only sleep with upper tier females and not giving in to the biggest male insecurity of them all - "If my penis isn't in SOMETHING, then my friends will not think I am cool".

Either way, here's to warm vagina :cheers:
Click to expand...

I'll claim # 2...The thought of nailing some whore who doesnt know me for shit or me her repulses me.

Seriously any chick that would go fuck some ramdom dude disgusts me totally.
 
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