Can men and women be just friends?

[Werd]

Sorry. Either one (2) in a million, neither man was attracted or some other force (wife, kids, he had gonorrhea, impotent, gay) was interfering.

Glad though that you had 2 such nice experiences

I agree - they were both one in a million. Both men were beyond divorced. Neither had children, we were BOTH attracted to each other, neither was gay, impotent or diseased.

I think that more than their own character they intuitively knew how to treat me because of how badly I had been abused by so many in my life who were SUPPOSED to have cared and loved me. They were very kind and gentle because I think they saw how much I NEEDED to be treated that way.

If it weren't for those two men, I would never ever be able to even have a glimmer of hope that I ultimately be strong enough to fix what was broken in me a long time ago. My kids have a fighting chance to be happy in life because their mother is finally "getting it".

Through true suffering comes enlightenment.

However, had I not had these two men come into my life I might have been enlightened but I would be void of hope.

Adham (the Egyptian man who took me in) said to me once (We often talked about many delicate issues), "I am very attracted to you. You are very beautiful and kind. I am proud of the fact that I am not an animal, but a man who CAN and DOES control my urges."

These two men (along with a few others I know) are setting the standard for me to choose a S/O. Until I can find a man that lives up to these standards, I will choose to stay alone.

 

[SoreArms]

Once we have already had sex, I am able to remain friends with chicks even if nothing more happens. Until there is sex, although there can be a genuine friendship, the ultimate thought is about getting in their pants.

and I can't be friends with ugly chicks 'cause I don't hang out with any (what can I say, I'm pretty vain)

 

[cutiepie04]

I think it depends on the willpower of the two parties involved. Men and women will look at a picture, stranger on the street, coworker, or good friend and think how much they would "like to play out their dirty secret". It is when the line between fantasy and reality is crossed that the problems begin.

Yes I believe that men and women can be just friends, but in each others minds one is always going to be thinking about "just what if".

 

[gonelifting]

So what if there are a group of friends you hang out with? 10 guys/ 10 girls... They`re all friends, Are they all gonna have slept with one another at some point?

I never had many female friends. The couple that I DID have, came on to me at some point. One was even going with a buddy of mine. As soon as I found out what her intentions were, I ended the "relationship". I told her I could`nt do that to my buddy.

Also, if I were in a relationship, I would not make a friendship anything more than that.

 

[Lao Tzu]

I can't speak for the women but for the men, if the woman is attractive, the guy can never be 'just friends' with her. It's always in the back of his mind that if he got the chance.......

He may pretend to be just friends, sometimes even for many years but if she even gave him a sniff that it was possible, he'd be all over it in 2 seconds.....

I dont know, i have female friends i know in person who im not attracted to. some are attracted to me though. I dont know if women you only know via email and IM count, but i have some of them im not attracted to.

 

[bluepeter]

I dont know, i have female friends i know in person who im not attracted to. some are attracted to me though. I dont know if women you only know via email and IM count, but i have some of them im not attracted to.

That's what I mean by 'attractive'. Attractive to you i.e. if the whole 'friendship' thing wasn't in the way, you'd hump her leg

 

[Lao Tzu]

That's what I mean by 'attractive'. Attractive to you i.e. if the whole 'friendship' thing wasn't in the way, you'd hump her leg

Ah. Well if i were attracted to a woman i would have trouble maintaining a friendship with her, but the OP seemed to say men & women can never be friends. I think they can as long as sexual attraction isn't an issue. Even my female friends (one of whom is really attracted to me) is still my friend. But it kinda sucks because she plays juvenile head games on me that im sure she wouldn't do if she weren't attracted to me.

 

[jd_uk]

Nope...no way. I used to think so, but not anymore. It fucking sucks but it's true.

Only in exceptional circumstances then maybe the guy and girl can be decent friends, but still not really close.

 

[Taps]

Call me an asshole, but I don't really care to be good friends with women unless I'm dating/sleeping with them. I can act friendly, but I'm always thinking about boinking them. There are a few exceptions, but for the most part it holds true.

 

[bluepeter]

Ah. Well if i were attracted to a woman i would have trouble maintaining a friendship with her, but the OP seemed to say men & women can never be friends. I think they can as long as sexual attraction isn't an issue. Even my female friends (one of whom is really attracted to me) is still my friend. But it kinda sucks because she plays juvenile head games on me that im sure she wouldn't do if she weren't attracted to me.

I think that was the initial question and I said never with the exception on behalf of men that if the woman is involved with one of their friends or is unattractive, it can be done.

Haven't had much opinion from a ladies point of view...