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Anybody have experience dating a bipolar bitch?
- Thread starter FLEX4USML
- Start date
Yep. You can't win! RUN!
Do you think that this girl who you are ridiculing wants to have this condition? It is something that is unfortunately out of her control, just like you and many others come to this forum to educate yourselves on AAS, training, nutrition, etc...why don't you have some compassion and educate yourself on bipolar condition, and see what she is having to deal with for the rest of her life instead of calling her a bitch and making fun...pretty fucked up.
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Sorry, can't view this video on my Droid...all I.am saying is that before you talk down about this girl because she has a psychological condition that is out of her control, put yourself in her shoes...you don't think it bothers her? You don't think that she looks at herself in the mirror and sees herself as defected? Wonders why she is this way? I think the question you need to ask yourself is are you mature enough to handle a situation like this? Are you strong enough to handle the highs and lows of the condition and be the better person and maybe even help her with it instead of running because you are scared of it and don't know how to handle it?
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FLEX4USML
New member
Yeah thats what is seems like,its a rollercoaster ride from hell,And MAdd I have educated myself and I have delt with tons of shit I don't have to,point is I don't have to,just wanted some outside views,hers is to a level where she's supposed to be taking lithium but she refuses to bc she doesn't like the way she feels on it,or as she says "wasting money on it",waste my ass!
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What are the main symptoms of the disorder that bother you the most? Just the roller coaster relationship or the anger/aggression of the manic phase? What are the problems that you're seeing over and over?
Holy shit you stepped into a hornets nest. Do you sleep in the same bed with her?
Lol, you must be joking. Am I being trolled? Lol j/k.
Did she lie about it or did she tell you about it?
FLEX4USML
New member
Lol, you must be joking. Am I being trolled? Lol j/k.
No dear I'm 100% legit,the symptoms are the high and severe low moods,extreme anger and violence,compulsive lying,denial of logic and common sense,etc.And no she came clean w me,over a year ago when we first met she kept having her spells and I told her she was fucking nuts and I was leaving,thats when she told me and I stayed.
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Just asking...not attacking, if she refuses to take her medication that will help with the condition and has anger and aggression issues then yes that is something you have to weigh out, there are other medications for bipolar that she can explore, I do know first hand about this condition, and it needs medical attention...if she is.refusing it then that shows she doesn't care about herself, and so then you have to ask yourself how can she care about you then? In that case it may be better to walk away and let her know when she is ready to help herself to give you a call.
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How long have you been with her? Do you have kids? If you don't have kids and only been together a short while, leave. It's not your job to look after her and trying to care for her can ruin the quality of your life.
I'm sure she's not happy about her condition but as there is nothing anyone can do about it why put yourself through all the hassle? Whatever your reasons for staying together don't do it because you feel sorry for her.
Being in a relationship with someone is supposed to enrich your life not make you miserable. What's the point in living if you're not happy?
honestly lithium is horrible shit...there are alternatives however...
and out of curiosity has her shrink done real honest to god labs? including looking around for thyroid probs, pmdd, and a handful of other horrible things that mimic bipolar disorder?
I had a family member that was labeled bipolar...turns out she had jacked up hormones the entire time that took an incredibly intelligent endo to sort out...lithium destroyed her health in the meantime tho
anyway, if you can't handle it...cut bait and run because you'll only make it worse and add a new shitty dimension to her strife
and out of curiosity has her shrink done real honest to god labs? including looking around for thyroid probs, pmdd, and a handful of other horrible things that mimic bipolar disorder?
I had a family member that was labeled bipolar...turns out she had jacked up hormones the entire time that took an incredibly intelligent endo to sort out...lithium destroyed her health in the meantime tho
anyway, if you can't handle it...cut bait and run because you'll only make it worse and add a new shitty dimension to her strife
I agree...medication is really essential for a disorder like that. It's very tough to be rational with someone who isn't and you may have to make the hard decision because unfortunately, it's not going to get any better unless she helps herself. It's a very tough place to be. I feel for you!
ya...I had a pretty good friend that was schizophrenic
he was a great dude when he was medicated...and very bad hallucinations and dellusions when he wasn't
I eventually broke off contact with him because he played with his meds too much
he was a great dude when he was medicated...and very bad hallucinations and dellusions when he wasn't
I eventually broke off contact with him because he played with his meds too much
My experience is they take the meds, decided they feel cured and figure they don't need them; they stop and blow up and there NOTHING......NOTHING you can do or say to fix it short of shoving a pill down their throat. Like Cali said - you can't be reasonable with someone who can't be reasoned with. They usually fuck great but unless you can keep them drugged up it's just not worth the hassle, IMO.
FLEX4USML
New member
She doesn't see a shrink anymore she doesn't do shit about it and yes she's had the labs done,and yes she has a lot of other issues as well,hormone problems,severe indimeitriosis,thyroid imbalances,x alcoholic,something to do with estrogen pills,and it almost seems to be getting worse
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FLEX4USML
New member
You couldn't have fucking said it better,thank you,it drives me nuts and almost makes me feel like I'm going crazy when you can not rationalize or show simple logic to a grown woman,but yet my 8 year understands completely!It is a nightmare!!!!!
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sounds like a hormonal hot mess
and someone thats thrown in the towel with trying to get better
and someone thats thrown in the towel with trying to get better
musclemama scared me.
Musclemama
New member
Lithium is a serious drug . The therapeutic dose and toxic dose are not too far apart . You need constant blood work to make sure ur levels are in check . There are lots of drugs to help . It's just not easy to find the right one and def takes time . Best of luck .
Run far, far away. You cannot help this woman. She will only destroy you. The relationship will end badly eventually, better to get out now.
Bipolar under the best of conditions can be tough on the people they love; uncontrolled, it's insanity and will make you insane.
Lithium is a generic, it's not expensive so that's a BS excuse. She's delusional when she's on the upside and deluding herself. People in the manic state think they're functioning "better". The truth is it's like they're hopped up on some sort of speed, they're irrational, their thinking becomes grandiose, egocentric and even dangerous (because they can think they're invulnerable).
Seriously, get out, NOW.
FLEX4USML
New member
You nailed it,its horrible,its like another world ,she would literally argue to the death when there is no logic behind her argument and you can lay the facts out in front of her and it doesn't matter at all,there is no reasoning with this woman,Nothing I mean Nothing helps,and she lies constantly and you can prove and point out anything and it just makes it WORSE!
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FLEX4USML
New member
I love it,great thinking,however I don't have the balls,plus I don't know how id feel about myself for doing that.
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FLEX4USML
New member
Also I forgot to mention she's also got some sort of brain damage,her x smacked her in the head with a car seat in best buy parking lot and knocked her out and she hit her head on the curb.Not sure the extent of it but Im sure it can't help.
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Been there, done that. My first love developed bipolar disorder after a horribly stressful life experience (it happens that way sometimes, it's latent and then something triggers it). He was the sweetest guy when we first dated, kind, thoughtful, considerate, classy. When he got sick, it was like Jekyll and Hyde. In the course of a few months he caused serious damage to his parents house, crashed two cars, got arrested and nearly hurt me several times. His parents ended up having him committed then hospitalized to get him stable.
I have a very, very good friend who is a psychotic bipolar and she's what I would consider "brittle" in that she has huge problems when her meds get changed, frequently has to be hospitalized. Unfortunately she also has miserable side effects with a lot of meds but she doesn't want to be sick and does what has to be done.
Like I said, it can ruin the person's life and the lives of everyone around them and if your GF is in denial that makes things 1000x worse. All the other health problems you listed are only compounding things.
FLEX4USML
New member
Yeah she's had her vehicle issues just like your ex she destroyed 3 cars I bough her,all three resulted in DUIs,hit a telephone pole with one and knocked out power for two counties,and got a $14000 bill from the phone company,wonderful I KNOW
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Man, I don't care if she's the most beautiful creature on the planet and a completely uninhibited hellcat in bed, NOTHING is worth all the shit you're dealing with. Not your wife, haven't got kids with her, don't own real estate with her, GTFO and feel no guilt doing it.
Honestly, I'd sooner date an uggo sane person. Beauty is only skin deep but crazy goes all the way to the bone.
My best friend is bipolar. There have been so many times I've tried to walk away cause she is really hard to deal with. She hates taking her meds. She can be aggressive and hostile and very suicidal. I've had to pull her back from a cliff while we were hiking, stop her from fighting on several occasions and I've even drug her out of a busy street Downtown.
I stay her friend because when she is not acting out she is the most loving and kind person I know. She is also very loyal and I think that's hard to find in some female friends.
You have to ask yourself if the good out weighs the bad. Usually with this condition, it doesn't.
I stay her friend because when she is not acting out she is the most loving and kind person I know. She is also very loyal and I think that's hard to find in some female friends.
You have to ask yourself if the good out weighs the bad. Usually with this condition, it doesn't.
dutchman063
New member
GET OUT FAST!... been there done that..worst 3 months of my life, and she took her meds pretty religiously...
goodluck getting out clean though...when i finally dumped her, she spent the next month exacting her revenge on me and even tried to get me thrown in jail and royally fucking up my credit. luckily i escaped with little damage.
goodluck getting out clean though...when i finally dumped her, she spent the next month exacting her revenge on me and even tried to get me thrown in jail and royally fucking up my credit. luckily i escaped with little damage.
Wow bro...bipolar one thing, you added a list from hell, props to you for trying all this time, but yeah I think you have done enough, just break it off as clean as you can, and make sure there are no sharp or blunt objects within her reach...or maybe relocate first and leave no forwarding address...you have dealt with way more than I ever have, my wife is bipolar but I have to thank you...she is a kitten compared to what you dealt with, I feel a lot better with my situation...you will do the right thing, take care of yourself bro!
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jesus titty fucking christ, run for the hills.
blueta2
New member
FUCK, I love you! You are one of the coolest guys on EF, seriously!
I was going to say almost this, but you said it way better than moi
blueta2
New member
sounds more than bi polar to me. I know many ppl with bi polar and they do not act like this.
blueta2
New member
I need to add, the 3 bi polars I know, two do not take meds. Two are totally ok and one is not and it has some hard moments.
I`m going to get "lip" on this, but when I was apprenticing out of the clinic, part of my job was to transcribe all the notes for the ND from the conferences she went to. She did one on "Psychiatric Naturotherapy; Adjunct therapies to allopathic medicines" and there were many studies done that showed people with bi polar do not absorb Zinc well. There was also an issue with 5HTP and theanine not crossing the blood brain barrier in bi polars"
Now all to say, there are DEFINITE chemical causes for mental illness. Doesn't make it easier, but there are good therapist that work.
I`m going to get "lip" on this, but when I was apprenticing out of the clinic, part of my job was to transcribe all the notes for the ND from the conferences she went to. She did one on "Psychiatric Naturotherapy; Adjunct therapies to allopathic medicines" and there were many studies done that showed people with bi polar do not absorb Zinc well. There was also an issue with 5HTP and theanine not crossing the blood brain barrier in bi polars"
Now all to say, there are DEFINITE chemical causes for mental illness. Doesn't make it easier, but there are good therapist that work.
FLEX4USML
New member
Id love to cross her"blood brain barrier" trust me,but I wasn't raised like that.
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You are pretty awesome yourself blue
...love ya too girl! Sent from my DROID BIONIC using EliteFitness
blueta2
New member
Something close to what I was saying
The role of zinc i... [Prog Neuropsychopharmacol Biol Psychiatry. 2011] - PubMed - NCBI
The role of zinc i... [Prog Neuropsychopharmacol Biol Psychiatry. 2011] - PubMed - NCBI
FLEX4USML
New member
Example- And btw this is the third time some shit like this has happened this week ,a few hours ago I got home from work ,brought her food from panera($17) one fucking meal.She ate,I fucked her,we watched a movie,I got up to take a shower,while in the bath room I yelled Honey will you please go feed Brixxx (my Brazilian fila) ,no response ,I walk out a ask her the same thing,she's on the corner of the bed with a blank stare,I say thank you,5 min later she walks in the bathroom smacks the razor which is on my face out of my hand and says its your fucking dog you feed him(keep in mind this woman hasn't worked in 2 years I support her and her son,in my house) I said is that really the fucking way you wanna talk to me! She says fuck you I just remembered I have a date have a nice fucking life and left with a bag of clothes,45 min later she called me and said I'm sorry can I please come home,ill do anything! MY FUCKING LIFE SUCKS! WTF
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People with BPD feel extreme emotions and think and feel in black/white. People are either good or bad depending on the last interaction they have with you. They have deep anger and abandonment issues. The main thing that made me think that was your last post. I am not a professional but if you have a kindle you should download "Stop Walking On Eggshells - Taking Back Your Life When Someone You Care About has BPD" and skim through it and see if any of that sounds familiar to your situation. Its only 10 bucks. Its treatable.
FLEX4USML
New member
Yes mam,she is dx bipolar,but that was 8 years ago,her sis told me that her Dr was pissed when she quit coming and got off med bc he told her he thought it was progressive.So god knows where its at now
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Holy smokes...I would freak too bro, sorry to hear, you have to take care of yourself bro, she doesn't want help from what you are saying, she won't get better without it, so your situation won't either...as you are well aware. Blueta and Cindy hit it with it is way more than bipolar, that is almost like that one show "United States of Tara"...personality disorder, multiple personalities...all I can say is be careful bro!
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FLEX4USML
New member
Yes I did,its been four years I love this woman,and Cindy it happens every couple hours,and MAdd I know,trust me she's stabbed me,run over me and multiple stitches from being hit with shit
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blueta2
New member
Wow! You need to get some help. It's like anyone who is with an addict (and I was) where they say "you become as sick or sicker than the person you're with"
mrplunkey
New member
Obvious issue here is you didn't lay the pipe correctly.
Had you screwed her properly, she would have been asleep in the bed and never heard you ask her to feed the dog.
HTH!
I'm about a year and a half out of an abusive relationship. (Which I don't have to tell you that you are in.) I remember making excuses for what he did, it's not that bad, he didn't really mean it, I love him, blah, blah blah. I know that for me one of the hardest things was to admit I was really being abused. I thought that there was no way I was one of "those people".
Your situation is very serious. A woman is capable of killing a man, bud.
What are the things about her that you love so much?
And that isn't sarcasm or anything. I would really like to know.
I may have missed it but in no way will she get dedicated to therapy and take meds, even if you start packing her shit and give her a months rent for a hotel and tell her you are Done? Thats basically what I did.
Im on the elliptical so i'll chime in more but I hooked back up with my best friend from HS 15 yrs later and have. been dating long distance for over 2yrs and I came to grips that she had major mental health problems at about the 7 to 8 month mark. Maybe its the long dist that has preserved it but anyways...her family sided wiith her ex during divorce b/c he appears flawless which i tbought was when she snapped but what icve found out is that he is super messed up like diabolical and has mentally fucked her up since they got married. He called when i was on a long wkend there and said he needed their sons backpack. Fyi hes already gotten her in trouble for going to their house when hes not home. So i tell her he called and she says shell drp it off on the way to the store. It was a set up and he took pictures accusing her of breaking in. This happens all the time as she is very trusting mixed with some gullibility. I could go on forever with the bs he did and he's also close to the police had tons of money and so on.
So we have been all over the board tryin to diagnose her from bipolar to borderline but the latest is md. And tried a diff set of meds every few months. She's taking a new ADD med and celexa now which I swear has made her better. Its been slow but good progress. No way would i ever think she could work in the real world 2 yrs ago but now shes working 2 damn jobs. We now fight once every two weeks instead of 2-3 times a week and now she always explains how her point was baseless and just didn't want seem weak for losing. Anyways i'll give you more info when I get home. I stuck it out when most of her friends and family turned their backs on her and thats her in my avi so it was hard to leave from that perspective too. I had a long stressful time deciding whether to ditch her and move on OR help. Seeing her now I'm happy as hell even tho there are still struggles but back when it was bad I HATED dealing with her. Very tricky decision but if u don't think shell get serious years and years of help then get her outta there. Sheezus got carried away, gotta finish work out.... GL bro!
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Im on the elliptical so i'll chime in more but I hooked back up with my best friend from HS 15 yrs later and have. been dating long distance for over 2yrs and I came to grips that she had major mental health problems at about the 7 to 8 month mark. Maybe its the long dist that has preserved it but anyways...her family sided wiith her ex during divorce b/c he appears flawless which i tbought was when she snapped but what icve found out is that he is super messed up like diabolical and has mentally fucked her up since they got married. He called when i was on a long wkend there and said he needed their sons backpack. Fyi hes already gotten her in trouble for going to their house when hes not home. So i tell her he called and she says shell drp it off on the way to the store. It was a set up and he took pictures accusing her of breaking in. This happens all the time as she is very trusting mixed with some gullibility. I could go on forever with the bs he did and he's also close to the police had tons of money and so on.
So we have been all over the board tryin to diagnose her from bipolar to borderline but the latest is md. And tried a diff set of meds every few months. She's taking a new ADD med and celexa now which I swear has made her better. Its been slow but good progress. No way would i ever think she could work in the real world 2 yrs ago but now shes working 2 damn jobs. We now fight once every two weeks instead of 2-3 times a week and now she always explains how her point was baseless and just didn't want seem weak for losing. Anyways i'll give you more info when I get home. I stuck it out when most of her friends and family turned their backs on her and thats her in my avi so it was hard to leave from that perspective too. I had a long stressful time deciding whether to ditch her and move on OR help. Seeing her now I'm happy as hell even tho there are still struggles but back when it was bad I HATED dealing with her. Very tricky decision but if u don't think shell get serious years and years of help then get her outta there. Sheezus got carried away, gotta finish work out.... GL bro!
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This is exactly how it is. Awesome point.
canadianhitman
Well-known member
This is going to sound harsh, but I think you're a fool and deserve every bit of shit that's heaped on you. I have zero sympathy for self-inflicted wounds, and you are clearly doing this to yourself by chosing to stay with someone who will NEVER be 'right'.
Wow just read ur 751 post. We never touched each other shed just tell me she's cheating but be sitting at a coffee shop reading.
Another thing I did was I would write down the shit she did verbatim and leave a copy out. She kept these and read them and it made her face it quicker than arguing. OK back to it.
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Another thing I did was I would write down the shit she did verbatim and leave a copy out. She kept these and read them and it made her face it quicker than arguing. OK back to it.
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FLEX4USML
New member
FLEX4USML
New member
Screwing isn't the prob bro,u the time I had my 9 bye 9 in your mouth you fell in love too,btw stop calling me
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mrplunkey
New member
You obviously have me confused with one of your boyfriends.
And lighten up, Francis.
Yea, but , Hitman, you have to understand that he is sick too.
When you are in a situation like that you really don't have an understanding of how serious it is. It's like being brainwashed. There is not logic, it's completely irrational. You actually think it's YOU causing their behavior at times.
When I think about how I was in my abusive relationship....I actually hated myself so much I thought I deserved that kind of treatment. I don't think it's any different than someone who cuts themselves. It's sick to even think that way.
I love how all the resident board certified psychiatrist come out of the woodwork when people start talking about mental health conditions. Its enlightening!
Dude, you do NOT want to be in an intimate relationship with someone who has active mental health condition(s). You have been and will continue to be traumatized by their actions. Believe me, I have been there. You cannot fix them so stop feeling sorry for them and do yourself a favor and get the fuck out. Thank your lucky stars there are no kids involved.
Dude, you do NOT want to be in an intimate relationship with someone who has active mental health condition(s). You have been and will continue to be traumatized by their actions. Believe me, I have been there. You cannot fix them so stop feeling sorry for them and do yourself a favor and get the fuck out. Thank your lucky stars there are no kids involved.
FLEX4USML
New member
Thank you,you fuckin nailed it,I FEEL RETARDED,I honestly have began to think life is supposed to be this way
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It gets much worse. I was blocking out entire conversations with people out, so if they told me bad news or something, I would honestly not remember it in a couple of hours.
Even now, My Tshirt guy got just a little upset about something, he didn't yell or even move in an aggressive manor, he just cursed, and I flinched and felt sick for a couple of hours after.
You get to the point where talking and forming sentences is hard cause you are under so much stress all the time.
flex, get on a good forum for now. i don't know if you go to church but they have people there too that will talk to you about this regardless of your beliefs. i'll see if i can find the link to the forum i was on and pm it to you. it made me feel so much better.
the problem you have that i struggled with is if you find the strength to stop supporting her she'll be literally screwed. i kept telling myself that if i don't stick in there she'll be in a shelter and i could've stopped it.
canadianhitman
Well-known member
Do whatever it takes to find the will to put yourself first. This woman and her kid are not one fraction of a percent as important as YOU are....find that mindset by whatever means necissary!
I agree Smurf. I think there are kids involved....that was one of my concerns. They just don't have any together. She has an 8 yr old son??? Witnessing all this will change who he is.
wow. You dated her long distance for two years and discovered she was mentally ill at the 7 month mark and was able to still make that work? That's incredible.
Or she will be forced to get the help she needs.
We rarely make substantial improvements on ourselves if we aren't backed into a corner.
I think the distance eventually helped b/c she had burned every bridge out there including her family to an extent. So when i wasn't there she had to do it on her own. After she had drained her children's college and savings funds and I wasn't there to help it was starve or work. Then i'd show up and help with essentials then back on her own again.
Although i did travel a lot, took 5 day weekends every month. I travel with work and have lots of miles but i spent quite a bit of my own money on tickets too... and a ton on hotels and cabs there when she'd be cussing me out without explanation in the middle of the night.
We had a ton of history, grew up together. When she agreed to get regular counseling and find a medication that worked I kept at it and supported but soon as signs that she was backing out I'd tell her I was done and hang up or take an early flight back. It was actually great when she'd be in mania mode but then wham i was the world's biggest piece of shit getting laughed at b/c of the most random crap.
...and Thanks.
She's always working and working out now with an occassional rough patch here and there but pretty much has her life back.
Great post smurf, the first part especially. It wasn't until a laymen pointed out that maybe I was dealing with a mentally ill individual (a long time ago) and pointed me in the right direction that caused me to finally understand what was happening and to this day I can't thank her enough for that.
That, my friend, is what I would consider a "wake up call" moment. She did something so completely out of left field and violent that could have potentially harmed you (safety razor or not, shit can happen. I had a friend who stepped on a safety razor getting into the shower and ended up needing stitches).
Okay, I told you I had a bipolar boyfriend, right? I clearly remember my wake up call moment. I lived in an apartment and the main entrance doors to the complex had eye level windows about one foot square. Boyfriend and I get into an argument over something stupid and he tears out of the apartment. Dumbass me follows him. He slammed the main door to the complex so hard the glass shattered and the shards flew several feet into the hallway. If I had been just a foot or so closer to him I would have ended up with a face full of glass shards. He knew I was behind him but he never stopped, never looked back. I knew, at that moment, he just didn't care.
I was only 17 but I began to realize that anybody that could do something that dangerously thoughtless I didn't need in my life.
I'm going to assume you're older than 17.
I've heard of people who are bipolar and function without medication but they usually are very sharp and have really good personal insight to what's going on in their minds. People with no insight, who represent a danger to themselves and others can't pull it off. They need psychiatric and/or medical management. More importantly, they need to WANT to not be irrational assholes. She's just being a selfish c-word and you need to stop letting her shit on you.
But she said she'd do "anything" to come home.
Since she's hot, those are powerful words.
Fuck that. No piece of ass is worth continuing this cycle of insanity and disrespect.
Agreed...time to count your blessings and work on getting yourself healthy again, here is an old prayer you use to remind yourself..."God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (your girlfriend), the courage to change the things I can (yourself and the situation you are in), and the wisdom to know the difference (you know what you need to do, otherwise you wouldn't be here seeking justification for what you are feeling and for overall support). Obviously you must be a good looking guy if she is a hot gal as you described her, are you concerned that you won't find another if you let her go, and yes the hardest part of holding is letting it go...but for your overall health, you need to let her go.
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Wouldn't that be all of them?
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