Would you let your girl go to a male strip club?

[Robert Jan]

its cookies isn`t it smalls?

 

[paradox]

I've just been faced with an interesting scenario.

My girl and I have been together for 7 months. She turned 21 yesterday. Her friends (or, should I rephrase, her bitch friend whom I despise greatly and WISH I could show her some hurtin') were going to surprise her by taking her to a male strip club. My girl managed to get the information out of them. She told me that they were going to take her to a male strip club tonight. I told her absolutely not. After further insisting, I told her that I would be angry beyond all precedent if she did go.

What would you do?

Comments on what I did?

-Warik

As long as shes not fucking any of them whats the big deal? If she wants to go to a strip club "fine" let her & the girls get a giggle or 2 outta it, just tell her you & the guys are going to the titty bar that same night as well.

 

[Warik]

She didn't go to the strip club.

Her, three of her friends, and I went to a club instead. I had a drink and did the best job I possibly could to dance for every single minute she was dancing. She had a great time and I had a great time, and everyone went home happy - and I hope to God that you all think I did the wrong thing because that would make me feel even BETTER.

Note to those who did not know: When I told her "absolutely not," it was in reference to her question which was phrased in such as way as it seemed that she was wondering if I was OK with it. So I told her absolutely not, which is true, I wasn't OK with it, but I NEVER told her she couldn't go and I even told her right there in her house that she was free to go BUT I completely hate the idea and did not like it in the slightest. In the end she made the right choice - she respected me and my feelings on the matter. I'm lucky to have her.

-Warik

 

[c3bodybuilding]

Bro, I understand your feelings on this one. I don't understand why a man or woman in a solid relationship would want to go see other naked people. I feel as if my fiancee' is all I need. I also have to wonder why you, her boyfriend are not with her on her 21st birthday. She is young, and should have the right to do what ever she pleases. But if some of those things bother you, and she still does them, then it's time to cut her loose. I know it's not what you want to read/hear, but it's the truth.

Also, the friend probably does want to cause trouble. A lot of girl and guy friends get jealous of the bond between two new lovers. It scares them. They feel as if you are a threat to them. That you will make them vanish. This is not the case, but it does end up happening. But usaully not because of what they thought, but because of their jealous and somtimes evil behavior. I wouldn't worry about this friend. If she is out to cause trouble, your friend will see this, and tell her to cut the shit out.

All in all, you seem hurt by this, and not angry. And you have a right to those feelings. If she went, she went. You can't change that. Don't be mean about it, or go to a strip club just to get revenge. Those are childish things to do, and will only cause many problems. Just tell her that it hurt your feelings, and made you upset that she went. See how it goes from there. If you keep telling her not to do this or that, she will only rebel against you. I hope this all has a happy ending.

ps. Now to make this post more light, my fiancee' used to live in Miami, and her friend broke up with her husband for one of the dancers at the most popular m. strip club there. He turned out to just use her for a new car, and some money! So you never do know! LOL Just kidding, that really did happen, but thats a 1 in a million thing!

 

[Pink Space Biscuit]

Okay, then I take back my psychotic murderer statement. It did sound like you were trying to be controlling in the first post though. Especially combined with the wanting to hurt her best friend!

 

[c3bodybuilding]

Ahh! It seems there was a happy ending to this after all! She did respect your feelings, and you have a great girl there. Most are not like that. I am very happy for you.

And no, you didn't do anything wrong, and you aren't some psycho on the verge to becoming the next Oj. Some people on here need to relax. You were obviously hurt by her wanting to go see other men naked, and you expressed those feelings. You had every right to do so.

 

[Warik]

I also have to wonder why you, her boyfriend are not with her on her 21st birthday. She is young, and should have the right to do what ever she pleases. But if some of those things bother you, and she still does them, then it's time to cut her loose.

Well, I always want to be with her. The reason I was not planning to be with her tonight was because she had asked me a few days ago if I wouldn't mind if we didn't hang out together tonight because her friends wanted to take her on girls' night out to a club. Me, being the loving boyfriend that I am, immediately told her sure no problem. It wasn't until I (and she!) found out that this "club" was a strip club that the problems started. I of all people of course agree that EVERYONE has the right to do whatever he or she wants to do as long as it does not infringe on someone else's rights. None of my rights would have been infringed if she had gone, so I was not forbidding her to go nor would I ever do so. That's what few people seem to understand on this thread. I didn't say no! I said: "I don't like it and I'll be very upset, but I won't stop you." I'm very happy to know she made the right choice.

Also, the friend probably does want to cause trouble. A lot of girl and guy friends get jealous of the bond between two new lovers. It scares them. They feel as if you are a threat to them. That you will make them vanish. This is not the case, but it does end up happening. But usaully not because of what they thought, but because of their jealous and somtimes evil behavior. I wouldn't worry about this friend. If she is out to cause trouble, your friend will see this, and tell her to cut the shit out.

The part that I'm quite amused about is that her friend vanished from her life for months and suddenly reappeared a few months ago and won't shut the hell up and mind her own business. My girl sees it too, because she realizes that most of the disagreements/arguments we've had in the past few months have involved or been caused indirectly by her friend. I can't and won't expect her to ditch her friend though. Fortunately, I don't have to worry about that, because she's moving her ass 300+ miles away to go to a new college at the end of August. YEEHAW

Don't be mean about it, or go to a strip club just to get revenge. Those are childish things to do, and will only cause many problems.

Hah... I never would. My friend has invited me several times to go to a strip club and I've told him no every time. I never even thought of asking her if she'd be OK with it if I went, because *I* wouldn't be OK with it if I went. You won't find any hypocrisy here... nosireebob.

Ahh! It seems there was a happy ending to this after all! She did respect your feelings, and you have a great girl there. Most are not like that. I am very happy for you.

And no, you didn't do anything wrong, and you aren't some psycho on the verge to becoming the next Oj. Some people on here need to relax. You were obviously hurt by her wanting to go see other men naked, and you expressed those feelings. You had every right to do so.

Thanks. I'm glad everything turned out well too. Sorry for making you type that long post before you read that it was all good. =)

Okay, then I take back my psychotic murderer statement. It did sound like you were trying to be controlling in the first post though. Especially combined with the wanting to hurt her best friend!

Aww come on... you couldn't see the exaggeration in my post? I'd never physically hurt anyone who wasn't trying to physically hurt me. I just found it funny how my friend's ex had one of those "I hate her friend" friends and he told me that he "wanted to show her some hurtin'" and I vowed to use that line one day. I'd never try to control any single person. (As for a whole country or planet of people, however, no promises there. )

-Warik

 

[AAP]

Damn. Not only did she miss out on a fun evening, but she had to be "accompanied" by Warik and watch him to the He Man Shuffle half the night.

Been together 7 months and she already has her free will taken away.

I think she just "acted" like she had a good time because she didn't want you to think otherwise.

Just wait til you turn your back.................

 

[CrimsonKing]

Damn. Not only did she miss out on a fun evening, but she had to be "accompanied" by Warik and watch him to the He Man Shuffle half the night.

Been together 7 months and she already has her free will taken away.

I think she just "acted" like she had a good time because she didn't want you to think otherwise.

Just wait til you turn your back.................

 

[smallmovesal]

its cookies isn`t it smalls?

yep.... just leave a trail of monster cookies to your bed and i'm all yours... lol