Scout, you are troubled with the way things are going in your life. I recommend that you also seek therapy in conjunction with the psychiatrist, in fact, most psychiatrists will require that to see you on and ongoing basis.
Coming up with a gameplan and discussing it and reviewing the way you view things with a competent professional in addition to medication is the most successful path given the research.
Taking a pill is beneficial in transitory matters for example loss of a loved one to "turn the brain off" for a bit.
But Ive seen some unresolved anger in your posts. A pill may not get you from point A to point B to being truly happy. I can only assume logically that would be your ultimate goal.
Drugs in conjunction with cognitive therapy may get you there, no guarantee, but I highly suggest that you consider following what the psychiatrist recommends in regards to therapy with a psychologist.
A psychologist can listen to you while the psychologist can treat the brain chemistry. They are not the same and do not receive the same training.
The combination of both will not hurt you only help you.
As far as benzodiazepines, they are basically the same only the half life is different meaning length of time they affect you. Ativan would probably the best happy medium IMO, Im not a fan of valium given a longer half life and its tendency to encourage addiction which also encourages alcohol use when valium is not easily availaby since benzos are alcohol in a pill minus the excitatory stages of alcohol.
Tough road to hoe, good luck
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