I stayed in and had a small pool party. Played Invincible on the big screen and outdoor tvs. It was fun.
Made a startling conclusion last night. People named John Holmes really do have big cocks. For real. Dude bearing the same name and near same size dick was a guest of a guest last night. And apparently, people named John Holmes possess a degree of ugliness in direct proportion to their huge cocks. The original Holmes was an ugly ass mofo, and this guy could only be described as a circus clown minus the makeup. It went something like this :
AAP : (being introduced) Hi, glad you could make. What's your name?
JH : John
AAP : Oh another John, plenty of those running around. Don't feel offended if I forget your name ok.
JH : Well my name is easy to remember, it's John Holmes.
AAP : Ha Ha.
JH : No really, my name is really John Holmes.
AAP : Are you serious? What kind of parent names their kid after John Holmes? That is the most recognized porn star of all time. You have some serious shoes to feel walking around with that moniker.
JH : Well I think I measure up.
AAP : Oh, you got a cock like the Holmes too?
JH : Well, yeah. It's sort of big.
AAP : Let's see.
JH : *pulls down pants*
AAP : HOLY FUCKING SHIT!! God damn put it away before someone steps on it.
AAP : *thinking "well at least the ugly bastard got something going for him."*
Made a startling conclusion last night. People named John Holmes really do have big cocks. For real. Dude bearing the same name and near same size dick was a guest of a guest last night. And apparently, people named John Holmes possess a degree of ugliness in direct proportion to their huge cocks. The original Holmes was an ugly ass mofo, and this guy could only be described as a circus clown minus the makeup. It went something like this :
AAP : (being introduced) Hi, glad you could make. What's your name?
JH : John
AAP : Oh another John, plenty of those running around. Don't feel offended if I forget your name ok.
JH : Well my name is easy to remember, it's John Holmes.
AAP : Ha Ha.
JH : No really, my name is really John Holmes.
AAP : Are you serious? What kind of parent names their kid after John Holmes? That is the most recognized porn star of all time. You have some serious shoes to feel walking around with that moniker.
JH : Well I think I measure up.
AAP : Oh, you got a cock like the Holmes too?
JH : Well, yeah. It's sort of big.
AAP : Let's see.
JH : *pulls down pants*
AAP : HOLY FUCKING SHIT!! God damn put it away before someone steps on it.
AAP : *thinking "well at least the ugly bastard got something going for him."*

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