I'm probably not going to be popular but, I come from a business background. Business is business ... it's clear you try to take all the members into consideration, you try to be fair (and I really think that you actually not only meet the call of duty but go above and beyond that call to your customers), in other words, you really seem to try to treat your clients with respect. To give one member special consideration leaves you in a position where, not only do you have to defend business decisions, you also you have the situation of giving a person an inch, they take a mile and so forth ... then there is the inevitable whiner who says "but you did it for so-and-so ..." who needs that crap? Rules are made so each case doesn't have to be re-evaluated and the wheel reinvented time and time again, with the inevitable time (MONEY) that is wasted considering each situation ...
A platinum membership is nonrefundable, END OF DISCUSSION, the way I would expect something like that refunded is only under extreme hardship that could be proven (IMO, a situation like the husband buys lifetime plat then dies suddenly and unexpectedly a few months later, it would be nice if his widow could collect back some of that money, that's about it ... )
So if you're asking my opinion, I say options #1 and #12.
If the man is coming onto the site and posting slanderous things he is not ONLY acting immature, but also screwing with your livelihood, ergo, you don't owe him a thing. You gave him special consideration once and this is how it gets repaid
Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.