Men Do You Have Issues with Your Father?

[javaguru]

It seemed like an interesting issue to discuss; It appears in many movies. I'll start with a repost of my response from another thread,

It seems to be a theme in a lot of movies; It's one in fight club and apparently the author claims everything he addresses is based on things othe rmen have discussed. Personally, my father was "distant" and always working to support the family but I have the upmost respect for him. Not only was he an upstanding family man but he was a navy corpsman in WWII. He enlisted right after Pearl Harbor; served on Tarawa and Iwo Jima so I can only imagine the shit he's been through. However, the only "war story" he ever told was when I was playing high school football and made a smart ass remark about being lucky. He told me a story about being on the deck of the LST with the captain and Xo when they were strafed by a Japanese fighter. The captain was killed outright and the XO mortally wounded...my father didn't have a scratch on him. He then proceeded to hit the Tarawa beachead with a Batallion of marines and only a handful of them survived. I think his pont was....don't laugh at lady lucky because you probably wouldn't be here without it.

 

[biteme]

I'm very hard on my father and I can't show affection for some reason. He was a very dominating father and even though he could never dominate me now, I may have an unconscious fear of that. He always took care of his family and was very talented and a hard worker, despite being a country boy who was so ignorant about some things that it was funny.

 

[HumorMe]

I never had any issues with my father. His life was built on honesty and integrity and doing things the right way. I never met anyone who knew him that said anything bad about him. He might be dead and gone and but he is and will always be my hero.

 

[EnderJE]

My dad was very hardworking and taught me that life was a game to be won. I can still remember one of his favourite sayings...

"There's only two places in life. First and who cares?"

Then he got his heart attack and stopped trying to hard at work. On some level, I lost a little respect for him because of that.

 

[biteme]

My dad was very hardworking and taught me that life was a game to be one. I can still remember one of his favourite sayings...

"There's only two places in life. First and who cares?"

Then he got his heart attack and stopped trying to hard at work. On some level, I lost a little respect for him because of that.

Bro. We know that he didn't place much emphasis on spelling.

 

[EnderJE]

Bro. We know that he didn't place much emphasis on spelling.

Uh oh...I'm pulling a MissFit...thanks for the note...I'll fix it now.

 

[hardrock]

Yep. Haven't spoke to him in about 4-5 months. he's only 10 miles away. he forgets my bdauy every year and is a total busy body. Can't sit still for a minute. Been that way since he quit drinkin 25 years ago.

 

[Destroyer1986*]

I'm very hard on my father and I can't show affection for some reason. He was a very dominating father and even though he could never dominate me now, I may have an unconscious fear of that. He always took care of his family and was very talented and a hard worker, despite being a country boy who was so ignorant about some things that it was funny.

^^ except my dad is no country boy . At 19 im starting to resolve issues with my father.

 

[Devastation]

i talk to mine every day. he is my best friend. seriously

 

[Hiatussin]

my fathers an extreme cynic

im in med school and he very seriously advised me to dump my gf, slut around during my uni years and marry another doctor after asap since its fiscally beneficial to be a medical couple.

 

[HiDnGoD]

I see my Dad about every 2 months, we talk about once a month. He Taught me about the value of hard work & that your immediate family is your first priority. I don't seek his advice often, because I am smarter than he, but when I do, he's always been straight forward, says what he thinks.
He's a good man & he taught me how toi be a good man.

 

[bullett]

not really anymore, he's dead...

 

[MattTheSkywalker]

Nah, we've accepted each other for who we are. I always repsected him, but we didn't get close until later on in my life.

My experiences as a child are some of the reasons I am waiting until later in life to have children of my own. Live. Learn.

 

[Becoming]

I would say I disagreed with him a lot when I was younger, and was pissed at him quite a bit too, and for a while, though we were fundamentally different in terms of philosophy about life.

But as time progressed, I learned that he was right about almost everything. And some of the smallest things are the things that were most important that I learn. And perhaps the reason he told me the things that were so "counter-intuitive" to my own personal philosophies were maybe because he knew so well exactly who I was/am.

So I guess you could say I have come to appreciate him a lot more as I have grown older.

Also I have noticed more recently that like any other person, he also has things that hurt him and/or cause him to be sad, or discouraged, and also that he is getting older, like all other people. That makes me kind of sad, and even more sad that most of my life I was an asshole and would not have given a shit.

 

[javaguru]

It seems most men get closer to their fathers later in life; For me it started when I was in college. According to my mother, I'm his favorite and he speaks very highly of me to everyone. He's eighty one now and it's sad to see what's happening to him physically and mentally, also according to my mother, he's just wishing to die now. The last time I was home I literally had to pick him up and put him in bed. It's very sad because he's a proud and stubborn man, which is exactly where I get it from, so I understand where he's coming from.

 

[SoreArms]

I have lots of hatred and anger toward my father. He never beat us and he was a good provider but his idea of discipline and respect was through fear and degradation. I talk to him and tolerate him because of my mother and little sister who live with him. Otherwise I could go the rest of my lifetime without talking to him again and I wouldn't miss him at all. To this day, just his presence makes me angry and uneasy. I hope to one day hold a mirror to his face and let him see and feel how misserable he has made us all.

 

[Scotsman]

I get along great with my dad and always have. I love spending time with him, although with my current job this is a little difficult due to me being gone so much. Most of my greatest childhood memories involve my dad, even though he worked a lot and wasn't around a lot of the time. I still feel my did is a far better man than I'll ever be.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[buffer1]

I'de smash mine in the face at any given time and he knows it

 

[HumorMe]

I honestly feel sorry for people that never had a good relationship with their father/parents.

 

[hotzie]

i used to have major issues with him , im startin to try and look past the past. i think i have talked to him once in the last 3 or 4 years

 

[javaguru]

This has been a great thread. I wonder how many women have issues with their father Vs. the men?

 

[JarheadChiro]

Mom would take me new shoes shopping before school started when I was little.
When I got home Mom would say, "show them to your Dad".
He would then tell me that I wouldn't last 5 minutes in (insert bad area) with those.

Till I joined the Marine Corps.


Then he said your all brawn no brains.

So I went to Chiropractic College.

Then he said Chiro Coll can't be as hard as M.D. School.

So, here I am finishing up M.D. School.

I don't talk to my parents anymore, they haven't helped me with shit.
I paid for ALL of my school, GI bill and such.

 

[silverbackn]

My father and I aren't talking. He said things to me that I wouldn't say to my worst enemy. The worst part of it is that he said them through an e-mail, not even man enough to say it to my face.

 

[jenscats5]

This has been a great thread. I wonder how many women have issues with their father Vs. the men?

It wasn't pretty, I'll just say that........