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theoak01

theoak01

New member
as you know Im getting married Nov 10 and my wonderful soon to be wife wanted this huge wedding and I just sat back shut up and didnt say fuck all, but now when its coming to honeymoon planning we are fighting about the fact that we might have to put it on credit and pay it off over a few months, she thinks we should wait till next year when we have more money, however we are both so busy I know it wont happen that we have time off together.

so my question is how important is a honeymoon, it means alot to me,mostly because I havent travelled much.

I want opinions,I think it would be a nice way to unwind after all the stress
 
You'd better get all that arguing in now cause once you're married you are no longer allowed to have an opinion or voice what could be mistaken for one.
 
Don`t start your married life together in debt. If you have to put it off a while, do that. If having time to do it later is a problem, place a down payment on a trip and make payments. If you do that you`ll both have it scheduled and won`t screw it up and lose your deposit.
 
theoak01 said:
as you know Im getting married Nov 10 and my wonderful soon to be wife wanted this huge wedding and I just sat back shut up and didnt say fuck all, but now when its coming to honeymoon planning we are fighting about the fact that we might have to put it on credit and pay it off over a few months, she thinks we should wait till next year when we have more money, however we are both so busy I know it wont happen that we have time off together.

so my question is how important is a honeymoon, it means alot to me,mostly because I havent travelled much.

I want opinions,I think it would be a nice way to unwind after all the stress
Click to expand...
Hmmmmmm....lots of questions at play here.

Is it worth going in debt over it? We don't know your financial situation to know. My guess is that if you are putting it on a credit card, it may not be the best thing to do.

I didn't go on a honeymoon when I got married because I didn't feel I could take the time off of work. In retrospect, I wish we would have taken a honeymoon.
 
Tytan said:
Don`t start your married life together in debt. If you have to put it off a while, do that. If having time to do it later is a problem, place a down payment on a trip and make payments. If you do that you`ll both have it scheduled and won`t screw it up and lose your deposit.
Click to expand...

What he said. ^^^

I STILL have not had a honeymoon, an engagement ring or even a formal proposal and we will be celebrating one year in hell *cough* I mean, wedded bliss soon.

My wedding also cost us (hmmmm the price of airfare for the groom) and that's about it. I wore my sister's dress and we had a very small ceremony in my apartment in Jersey with only my best gf (she gave me away dressed as a pirate), two of my girls (we were afraid to tell them that it was my wedding so the third opted to go trick-or-treating with her gf, poor thing cried for days after she found out she missed my wedding) and my sister (trailertrash matron of honor), my brother-in-law (her trailertrash husband) and their three kids. My husband was so broke that my sister actually paid for our rings which though they are uncommon are made of sterling silver so they cost less than 100$ TOGETHER. My sister and gf brought most of the food and we HAD A FREAKING BLAST!!!!

It would be nice to spend all kinds of money, but if you don't have it at the time of the wedding does that make THE MARRIAGE less special?
 
heatherrae said:
In retrospect, I wish we would have taken a honeymoon.
Click to expand...


Whuuuut? Why? You're not married anymore so why the regret of not taking one? I could see it meaning something if you were still with that person.
 
PuddleMonkey said:
Whuuuut? Why? You're not married anymore so why the regret of not taking one? I could see it meaning something if you were still with that person.
Click to expand...
My ex hubbie deserved one, and it was silly that I put my job first. He's a good man, and I could have done that better for him.
 
heatherrae said:
My ex hubbie deserved one, and it was silly that I put my job first. He's a good man, and I could have done that better for him.
Click to expand...


Huh? Don't you hate your ex like women are suppose to? You know, want him dead and stuff?

Did you just admit fault? :worried:
 
PuddleMonkey said:
Huh? Don't you hate your ex like women are suppose to? You know, want him dead and stuff?

Did you just admit fault? :worried:
Click to expand...
no, I don't hate him. I love him and would give him the shirt off my back. He's a good man. Our divorce probably was more my fault than his.
 
PuddleMonkey said:
Huh? Don't you hate your ex like women are suppose to? You know, want him dead and stuff?

Did you just admit fault? :worried:
Click to expand...

I have never heard Ms PregoRae say a single bad thing about her exhusband. Why I dont understand why some little men on EF give her shit about crap...

I dont always agree with her politics but I have NEVER seen her being malicious towards anyone that wasnt an out and out ass to her. Matter of fact, she was quite calm with many members that I might have wailed on were they attacking me.
 
BIKINIMOM said:
I have never heard Ms PregoRae say a single bad thing about her exhusband. Why I dont understand why some little men on EF give her shit about crap...
Click to expand...


I wouldn't know, usually her relationship posts are so long and I'm so impatient I don't get a chance to read them. Some of you EF wimminz should be required to add cliff notes to your posts :)
 
PuddleMonkey said:
I wouldn't know, usually her relationship posts are so long and I'm so impatient I don't get a chance to read them. Some of you EF wimminz should be required to add cliff notes to your posts :)
Click to expand...

LOL Yes, I know. We frequently forget that the average male attention span is over once they get passed titts, dont even make it to ass. :lmao:
 
omg, guys that are not even married are welcoming Oak to hell :rolleyes: Shut the fuck up!



Oak, congrats man and about the honeymoon....argh, I dont know what to say.....if the wedding puts you in debt, I dont know if you would like some more of the same..I dunno man, its between you and her to decide that
 
foreigngirl said:
omg, guys that are not even married are welcoming Oak to hell :rolleyes: Shut the fuck up!
Click to expand...


:wavey:


Some of us single guys have friends that are married. We're just help spreading the word :)
 
What makes you single guys think that it is EASY and WONDERFUL for the woman while it is a prison for the man?


Just sayin.....
 
PuddleMonkey said:
:wavey:


Some of us single guys have friends that are married. We're just help spreading the word :)
Click to expand...
you single guys that have married friends are just jealous that your friends dont pay attention to you more than their wife. BROS BEFORE HOES!!!!

Oh, and your friends may talk about their problems with their wifes more often just so you single friends dont feel like you are missing on something, just to make you feel better for not having a friend (that shares your responsibilities, intimate life and comforts you at your darkest hours) to grow old with
 
PuddleMonkey said:
Facts, statistics and pie graphs.
Click to expand...

How is married life EASIER for the woman?

Man has someone else to cook, clean up his shit and arrange HIS social calendar, rear his children, some bring money in from outside sources AND he gets ass on occasion if he isn't too big of a dickwad.

Woman gets to provide all that.

And for the record - I REALLY love Foreigngirl's point of view.
 
foreigngirl said:
you single guys that have married friends are just jealous that your friends dont pay attention to you more than their wife. BROS BEFORE HOES!!!!

Oh, and your friends may talk about their problems with their wifes more often just so you single friends dont feel like you are missing on something, just to make you feel better for not having a friend (that shares your responsibilities, intimate life and comforts you at your darkest hours) to grow old with
Click to expand...



lol, actually all but one of my friends are either divorced or separated. And the one still married told me last week he's not sure it will last much longer (its his second marriage). Only successful and happy marriage I know of is my brothers.
 
BIKINIMOM said:
Man has someone else to cook, clean up his shit and arrange HIS social calendar, rear his children, some bring money in from outside sources AND he gets ass on occasion if he isn't too big of a dickwad.

Woman gets to provide all that.
Click to expand...


wtf? They do? Sign me up!!!!! Except for the children part.
 
PuddleMonkey said:
lol, actually all but one of my friends are either divorced or separated. And the one still married told me last week he's not sure it will last much longer (its his second marriage). Only successful and happy marriage I know of is my brothers.
Click to expand...

that sucks. People need to stop thinking only about "me, me, me". Instead start shifting their thought towards "us"



BIKINIMOM - :heart: I speak from experience, since we have a LOT of unmarried friends and some of them act like they were the wife, not me :lmao:
 
theoak01 said:
as you know Im getting married Nov 10 and my wonderful soon to be wife wanted this huge wedding and I just sat back shut up and didnt say fuck all, but now when its coming to honeymoon planning we are fighting about the fact that we might have to put it on credit and pay it off over a few months, she thinks we should wait till next year when we have more money, however we are both so busy I know it wont happen that we have time off together.

so my question is how important is a honeymoon, it means alot to me,mostly because I havent travelled much.

I want opinions,I think it would be a nice way to unwind after all the stress
Click to expand...
if i were you I wouldnt incur any debt just for a honeymoon which ends as fast as it begins. you will end up incurring plenty of debt in the early stages of your marriage as it is.

lumber and I havent gone on a honeymoon but we could go at anytime. if it's a financial strain you dont want to start out your marriage that way. finances are the #1 reason married people fight. honeymoon destinations arent going anywhere anytime soon. you have the rest of your lives together.,

this is Smurfy BTW
 
Lumberg said:
finances are the #1 reason married people fight.

this is Smurfy BTW
Click to expand...


Yep, that and kids. Probably the reason my brothers marriage has lasted so long and gone so smooth. No kids and they both have 6 figure salaries. All my friends that are divorced have debt and kids. Imagine that.
 
theoak01 said:
as you know Im getting married Nov 10 and my wonderful soon to be wife wanted this huge wedding and I just sat back shut up and didnt say fuck all, but now when its coming to honeymoon planning we are fighting about the fact that we might have to put it on credit and pay it off over a few months, she thinks we should wait till next year when we have more money, however we are both so busy I know it wont happen that we have time off together.

so my question is how important is a honeymoon, it means alot to me,mostly because I havent travelled much.

I want opinions,I think it would be a nice way to unwind after all the stress
Click to expand...

dude you can balance transfer debt at no interest for the rest of your life.. dont pass on a honeymoon.. you and your wife will be upset that you didn't do one for the rest of your life bud..
 
well it was line of credit which is cheap,but either way it appears as ive been a selfish prick lately which blew up tonight when I went out for a few beers to a local strip bar with a friend,apparently thats a big deal and Im not sleepin on the couch
 
very strange

BIKINIMOM said:
What he said. ^^^

I STILL have not had a honeymoon, an engagement ring or even a formal proposal and we will be celebrating one year in hell *cough* I mean, wedded bliss soon.

My wedding also cost us (hmmmm the price of airfare for the groom) and that's about it. I wore my sister's dress and we had a very small ceremony in my apartment in Jersey with only my best gf (she gave me away dressed as a pirate), two of my girls (we were afraid to tell them that it was my wedding so the third opted to go trick-or-treating with her gf, poor thing cried for days after she found out she missed my wedding) and my sister (trailertrash matron of honor), my brother-in-law (her trailertrash husband) and their three kids. My husband was so broke that my sister actually paid for our rings which though they are uncommon are made of sterling silver so they cost less than 100$ TOGETHER. My sister and gf brought most of the food and we HAD A FREAKING BLAST!!!!

It would be nice to spend all kinds of money, but if you don't have it at the time of the wedding does that make THE MARRIAGE less special?
Click to expand...
 
if it means that much to you then go for it. me and my wife spent our honeymoon at bush gardens tampa florida and then old town in orlando. very cheap but we had a BLAST. i will never forget it and i will never regret not going on an expensive honeymoon to some island i cant pronounce. trust me sand is sand, palm trees are palm trees. meet half way and go somewhere local or even a cheap flight somewhere and have fun not blowing a load of cash (or credit even) and you can still have a blast. we made almost $6000 at our wedding in cash gifts. we spent about $1500 of it on the honeymoon and the rest we saved.
 
heatherrae said:
no, I don't hate him. I love him and would give him the shirt off my back. He's a good man. Our divorce probably was more my fault than his.
Click to expand...


I'm starting to think that heatherrae is an alien posing as a woman here on earth....
 
theoak01 said:
Im not sleepin on the couch
Click to expand...


Good for you...that'd be the day when someone would tell me I couldn't sleep in my own bed. The way I see it, I'm 240+lbs....good luck pushing me out of the bed when I decide to lay in it.
 
Married guys should not go to strip bars.

theoak01 said:
well it was line of credit which is cheap,but either way it appears as ive been a selfish prick lately which blew up tonight when I went out for a few beers to a local strip bar with a friend,apparently thats a big deal and Im not sleepin on the couch
Click to expand...
 
Weddings are one of the dumbest things ever.

Why not save that money you would spend on a wedding and take a nice vacation/honeymoon PLUS use the left over for a down payment on a house or something?

Think man think!
 
"I just sat back shut up and didnt say fuck all"

Sorry bro you've already doomed yourself and set a precedent for future decisions.
 
the wedding is important to share with our family and close friends,its just her guest list seems to include twice what mine does,we definately have a different definition of close friends and such,hell nobody from my moms side of the family is even invited,I wanted it cheap but she has this idea of what she wants and saying anything starts an arguement and since she makes the $$ I dont have much sway there

and I agree the strip club thing was stupid,had I known it was gonna blow up the way it did I wouldnt have gone, I still slept in the bed though,she went to the spare room,then we had make up sex this morning.
 
Honeymoon is NEEDED after planning a wedding and that day. It is a great way to get ride of stress afterwards! Plus as it gets closer, you have in the back of your mind, "THE HONEYMOON" makes the BS fights about things easier to get through. Trust me, I just got married and my wife and I said "Bermuda" all the time. It was like a goal to get to with all of the bs. Once it passes, it passes and it gone. It will just become another vacation if you take it later, if you take it later... Best of luck!

theoak01 said:
as you know Im getting married Nov 10 and my wonderful soon to be wife wanted this huge wedding and I just sat back shut up and didnt say fuck all, but now when its coming to honeymoon planning we are fighting about the fact that we might have to put it on credit and pay it off over a few months, she thinks we should wait till next year when we have more money, however we are both so busy I know it wont happen that we have time off together.

so my question is how important is a honeymoon, it means alot to me,mostly because I havent travelled much.

I want opinions,I think it would be a nice way to unwind after all the stress
Click to expand...
 
Dude go!
We had a bigger wedding, a reception with a hosted bar, band, ect. It cost a fortune. So we didn't go on a big honeymoon, and I wish we would have. The wedding was nice , but the honeymoon could have been better. I wish we'd have gone to great lengths for the honeymoon and backed off the wedding. Here is what you need to present to your woman. The wedding is for your friends and family, the honeymoon is for us!

Tell her how much it means to you and that no amount of money spent on the wedding will be as important to you as the honeymoon time spent with her. Go someplace fun. It doesn't have to be Borneo or something as exotic.

There will be arguments about money, kids, whatever, but talk about the money stuff ahead of time. Who's doing what with what money. What kind of goals. If you want the honeymoon why should she be selfish about a big wedding and not be able to afford a honeymoon?

Most divorce is over money or sex.
 
yonkers weights said:
Honeymoon is NEEDED after planning a wedding and that day. It is a great way to get ride of stress afterwards! Plus as it gets closer, you have in the back of your mind, "THE HONEYMOON" makes the BS fights about things easier to get through. Trust me, I just got married and my wife and I said "Bermuda" all the time. It was like a goal to get to with all of the bs. Once it passes, it passes and it gone. It will just become another vacation if you take it later, if you take it later... Best of luck!
Click to expand...


thanks man,I definately agree the honeymoon has been a nice thought after how stressful all this business is. she wants to go somewhere local or some shit like the falls which in november is fucking boring imo, but im not picking any fights over stupid shit,got enough other stuff going on then fighting about a honeymoon
 
wow, I did not know you were getting married. Congrats to you!
I don't think that some huge honeymoon is necessary. Can't you stay in a honeymoon suite not to far away for a few nights?
I was never one to want to go to the islands or anything...As long as I had some alone time with him I was fine!
 
theoak01 said:
as you know Im getting married Nov 10 and my wonderful soon to be wife wanted this huge wedding and I just sat back shut up and didnt say fuck all, but now when its coming to honeymoon planning we are fighting about the fact that we might have to put it on credit and pay it off over a few months
Click to expand...

I'd rather see people spend a lot of money on the honeymoon than on the wedding ceremony.

I've been to some lavish wedding ceremonies for marriages that did not last. At least a honeymoon would be a good vacation.

Mrs Longhorn and I took our honeymoon at the 7 year mark.
 
assuming that you have the financial where-with-all to pay. . .i say go on the honeymoon NOW. . .if you don't go now, you probably never will. . .and even if you do it won't be the same. . .traditions became traditions for a reason. . .plus, there's usually a shit-load of stress leading up to getting married (especially if you do and pay for everything yourself like my wife and i did) and that get-away downtime for a week after is very important (to put things in perspective) imho. . .with regard to the "debt" thing, as long as you are both repsonsible spenders, i say it's no big deal. . .at various times throughout our marriage, my wife and i have had all kinds of debt (house, cars, etc.). . .debt is a fact of life. . .managing it and having a spouse that has similar ideas about money is the real trick. . .while i appreciate your girl's responsible attitude, i think that you can be too responsible sometimes. . .
 
Here is a suggestion,

go on small vacation now ( like something for the weekend just to get away) then a few months down the road when all is good and well go for the real thing it would probally be cheaper if you went in say Feb vs December
 
Get the fuck out of Dodge. GO AWAY!
Even if it is a weekend trip to a bed and breakfast. Do something romantic, it does not have to cost a lot. Just something to look forward to after the wedding. Alone time for you two to unwind together!


theoak01 said:
thanks man,I definately agree the honeymoon has been a nice thought after how stressful all this business is. she wants to go somewhere local or some shit like the falls which in november is fucking boring imo, but im not picking any fights over stupid shit,got enough other stuff going on then fighting about a honeymoon
Click to expand...
 
theoak01 said:
thanks man,I definately agree the honeymoon has been a nice thought after how stressful all this business is. she wants to go somewhere local or some shit like the falls which in november is fucking boring imo, but im not picking any fights over stupid shit,got enough other stuff going on then fighting about a honeymoon
Click to expand...

Smart man - methinks you will have a long and prosperous marriage.
 
Bro, take my advise! Do the honeymoon thing now! We were going to wait 4 ours, and we still are eight years later. We both to busy now.
 
theoak01 said:
as you know Im getting married Nov 10 and my wonderful soon to be wife wanted this huge wedding and I just sat back shut up and didnt say fuck all, but now when its coming to honeymoon planning we are fighting about the fact that we might have to put it on credit and pay it off over a few months, she thinks we should wait till next year when we have more money, however we are both so busy I know it wont happen that we have time off together.

so my question is how important is a honeymoon, it means alot to me,mostly because I havent travelled much.

I want opinions,I think it would be a nice way to unwind after all the stress
Click to expand...
I've been married twice and I actually never had a "big" honeymoon. In fact, I didn't have a honeymoon at all with my second marriage, we took a day off in the middle of the work week, got married and went to work the next day.

You don't need to take a big, expensive trip to have a nice honeymoon. If money is an isse, take a long weekend, three or four days, go somewhere you can drive to and spend it in a nice hotel room that has a good amenities (good bed, large steam shower, fluffy towels), in close proximity of where you you can get nice meals. You will find that those days will be relaxing as hell (not doing a damn thing but rolling around in the sack) and will be something you will look back on with great fondness.

Take a vacation some other time and have fun travelling/sightseeing, then.
 
musclemom said:
I've been married twice and I actually never had a "big" honeymoon. In fact, I didn't have a honeymoon at all with my second marriage, we took a day off in the middle of the work week, got married and went to work the next day.

You don't need to take a big, expensive trip to have a nice honeymoon. If money is an isse, take a long weekend, three or four days, go somewhere you can drive to and spend it in a nice hotel room that has a good amenities (good bed, large steam shower, fluffy towels), in close proximity of where you you can get nice meals. You will find that those days will be relaxing as hell (not doing a damn thing but rolling around in the sack) and will be something you will look back on with great fondness.

Take a vacation some other time and have fun travelling/sightseeing, then.
Click to expand...

heck. . .you can get an all-inclusive trip to the bahamas for less than a g. . .
 
(good bed, large steam shower, fluffy towels)

Translation - Big TV with free satellite and free porn, Jacuzzi Hot Tub, good room service, fully stocked mini fridge.
 
heavy_duty said:
(good bed, large steam shower, fluffy towels)

Translation - Big TV with free satellite and free porn, Jacuzzi Hot Tub, good room service, fully stocked mini fridge.
Click to expand...

I still want to know why my initial post in this thread was so strange?
 
BIKINIMOM said:
I still want to know why my initial post in this thread was so strange?
Click to expand...


I STILL have not had a honeymoon, an engagement ring or even a formal proposal and we will be celebrating one year in hell *cough* I mean, wedded bliss soon. <--strange

Airfare for groom? why was he not already with you? Strange

Dressed as a pirate? strange

two of my girls (we were afraid to tell them that it was my wedding so the third opted to go trick-or-treating with her gf, poor thing cried for days after she found out she missed my wedding) <--very strange



and my sister (trailertrash matron of honor), my brother-in-law (her trailertrash husband) and their three kids. <---fucking strange

I know if you try to explain any of this shit it is going to be totally Weird, bizarre and strange!
 
heavy_duty said:
I STILL have not had a honeymoon, an engagement ring or even a formal proposal and we will be celebrating one year in hell *cough* I mean, wedded bliss soon. <--strange

Airfare for groom? why was he not already with you? Strange

Dressed as a pirate? strange

two of my girls (we were afraid to tell them that it was my wedding so the third opted to go trick-or-treating with her gf, poor thing cried for days after she found out she missed my wedding) <--very strange



and my sister (trailertrash matron of honor), my brother-in-law (her trailertrash husband) and their three kids. <---fucking strange

I know if you try to explain any of this shit it is going to be totally Weird, bizarre and strange!
Click to expand...

LOL oh......

My husband2B was in Texas at the time, while I was still in NJ.

We were married on Halloween LOL so we were all dressed in costumes.

And my husband had NO MONEY when we married so we couldn't afford an engagement ring, honeymoon, etc. yet there are still some ASSHATS on elite who call me a gold-digger. :lmao:
 
Here's the thread w/pics:

http://www.elitefitness.com/forum/chat-conversation/well-we-did-515298.html

And no, we didn't advertise his situation at the time as it really wasn't anyone's business. I did confide in a few close e-friends about it, but didn't broadcast it. Only laughed my fucking ass off when the gold-digger crew asked me, "If he lost all of his money would you still love him?"

DUH - I met him when he had mad bank and I MARRIED HIM BROKE. :qt:

Stupid broad that I am I couldn't even get the freaking gold-digger thing right!
 
heavy_duty said:
(good bed, large steam shower, fluffy towels)

Translation - Big TV with free satellite and free porn, Jacuzzi Hot Tub, good room service, fully stocked mini fridge.
Click to expand...
No, I said what I meant:

Good solid bed (tempurpedic, preferably), Large shower that can comfortably accomodate two, plenty of towels that actually have some acquaintenship with fabric softener.

I don't do mini-bars, I bring my own; ditto food because of allergies.

Jacuzzi hot tub could be nice, but I have a chemical thing, so :sick:

Porn :rolleyes: Whatever floats your boat.

Honestly, the canned shit doesn't do it for us. If we can't get each other's motor revving we'll just play cards :lmao:
 
Sorry I shouldnt have said translation.
I think you posted what girls like then I posted what men like LOL
well I guess some guys need fluffy towels
 
theoak01 said:
as you know Im getting married Nov 10 and my wonderful soon to be wife wanted this huge wedding and I just sat back shut up and didnt say fuck all, but now when its coming to honeymoon planning we are fighting about the fact that we might have to put it on credit and pay it off over a few months, she thinks we should wait till next year when we have more money, however we are both so busy I know it wont happen that we have time off together.

so my question is how important is a honeymoon, it means alot to me,mostly because I havent travelled much.

I want opinions,I think it would be a nice way to unwind after all the stress
Click to expand...
Do it!

Best time in the world.
 
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