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Marriage

LOL He really is the king of his castle, just like Ralph Kramden. He is also the keeper of the remote control. ;)
 
Wow, it's really interesting to read what I posted so many months ago concerning this topic. I have a totally different outlook on life now. A lot of has happened in the months since then to make me really stop and consider what I want. That apartment and Daschund that I mentioned would be easy outs. It would be so easy to say that love is not worth getting hurt over and I'm better off not trying it. Someone helped me see that's not the case. I don't know why I was so scared and unwilling to open myself up before. And yes, there's a chance in any relationship that it won't work, but it's a risk worth taking. I discovered that I am cut out for the married life. I want the kids and the husband. I want to be a good wife, the kind he can be proud of. I want the house and the dog...the whole nine yards. Now, the tough part is actually getting there.
 
velvett said:
That's good.



At least you won't be one of those people who find the right one and then break their heart with the inability to get over the past.



:)


I'm afraid that I will be one of those people.
 
My wife is my soulmate, and I love her more than life itself, but honestly the only reason we actually got married was to promise ourselves to be faithful to each other. We didn't need the big expensive ceremony (we got married in Vegas, just the two of us), we aren't going to have children, we lived together for years before making it official. We could have promised ourselves to each other without the legal papers and lived happily ever after, but marriage just makes it easier to explain it to family and friends. Our lives are no different after being married than it was before, it's just official now.

I think marriage is important for couples having children, but if two people just want to spend the rest of their lives together and they trust one another, then I don't feel it's as important. I know two couples who have lived their whole lives together but never got married, I don't see their love for each other being any less strong than my wife's and mine's.
 
PHATchik said:
I discovered that I am cut out for the married life. I want the kids and the husband. I want to be a good wife, the kind he can be proud of. I want the house and the dog...the whole nine yards. Now, the tough part is actually getting there.


Be careful what you wish for.... What you are describing isn't all that it is cracked up to be.

I know these terms are merely a simplistic way of describing a notion of something that is so much more, but wheneve I hear or see these things I feel so suffocated that I can hardly breathe.

I will never marry.... period. You all are looking at the permanent girlfriend
 
I'm getting married in October. I'm marrying my best friend. We love each other to pieces. I've never felt so comfortable around someone else. After 4 years of living together, we're still excited to see each other at the end of the day and are both a little sad when we leave for work every morning.

We both want the same tings in life. I'm very supportive of his career and he's very supportive of my education (even though neither of us are home much). He's amazing with kids and I've love to have kids with him at some point (in a looooong time). I think it's a mix of formalizing our love/friendship and a business deal. When we first started talking about buying a house a few months ago I made it clear that he wasn't going to be involved or on the paperwork if he didn't plan to marry me. But if he planned to, I was willing to buy it together.

I don't think getting married will be magical and everything will be roses. I think some people think that. We'll have the same problems then that we work on now. But for both of us, it's worth the effort.
 
Raina said:
After 4 years of living together, we're still excited to see each other at the end of the day and are both a little sad when we leave for work every morning.

Out of everything you said these were the most telling statements IMO.

This is the one. :) :)
 
Velvett, Honestly it was a bit of all 3 things you stated.

It's also about making a commitment or contract if you will that helps you
to realize how important THIS relationship is compared to a dating one.
This commitment helps when times get tough to make you realize you have got
to work through it vs: just saying F this and walking away..

Kinda like Car payment that are upside down in value LOL...
 
Raina said:
When we first started talking about buying a house a few months ago I made it clear that he wasn't going to be involved or on the paperwork if he didn't plan to marry me. But if he planned to, I was willing to buy it together.
Raina, congratulations on getting married. I hope you don't feel like you had to twist his arm. I can't imagine why you'd have to, you're a catch. If he doesn't realize that, then...
 
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