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how to fight muscle dismorphia

eviction

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Alright, so i admit i have a problem. When i first decided to juice at 168lbs, I felt like a lil' shrimp. So, now that I'm at 215lbs, I still feel like im small. I told myself before that if i got to about 190lbs i'd be huge. Then i hit 190 and still felt small. Then i did another cycle, saying i'd like to be at 200lbs then i'd stop, thats where i'd look good at. Well I hit 200 and felt small, dropped back down to 185 due to an injury. Then I hit anohter heavier cycle, get to 215lbs, and I still look in the mirror and I don't think i'm big enough. Its like the bigger i get, the more desire I have to get even bigger. My arms went from under 16" to 19", and none of my clothes fit. My first cycle was supposed to be my last cycle, but now that im at 215lbs, 235lbs is looking like my new goal. I'd be friggin scary at that size, so i'm debating on whether I can cope with 215lbs, or go through with my next cycle in april to reach 235lbs. And if i reach that goal, what happens if i feel the same way? I really don't want this to get out of hand. I'm sure some of you have this same problem, and will this urge to turn into the incredible hulk subside?
 
I feel you pain bro. I was in the same boat as you. For me it is changing my goals that had made the difference. I got tired of chasing mass and watching my body art(tatoo) morphing, and my skin spliting with every cycle. I'm now more interested in just being healthy now and I'm looking forward to droping about 20lbs-25lbs(fat and muscle) so that I can compete in a contact sport at a weight class where my height won't put me at a disadvantage. I just changed my goals thats all, I enjoy a lot more being a bad ass at the sport I'm practicing that just looking like one.
 
We all hear you... part of the game.

I've actually gotten to the point where everyone is like "you're too big" "why are you still getting bigger" "stop getting bigger" etc...

So i think i'll stay at this weight for awhile and work on increasing the quality of my muscles.
 
so its all a mind game i guess. Maybe if i do a huge cutter and shred up, lose a lil size just work on strength people will shut up
 
just go for it bro,once its all you can think about all day everyday then seek help,but aslong as you can function in normal life dont sweat it,we all have the bug,I never thought I would see the day where Im just under 200lbs ,now I am there and look the same as I did when I was 165 or so,atleast to me
 
I feel your pain too! I started juicing at 160 lbs after dropping from 180 lbs ripped....due to a knee surgery. Now that I look back I should have held off juicing till I worked up to about 195 or so. That's why I'm always preaching to newbies to wait....even though I didn't. Anyway, so I started at 160 about 4 years ago and reached 250 lbs by last September. I have always been ripped until I put on 47 lbs on my last bulking cycle but a lot of it was fat. So here I was 250 lbs at 24% bodyfat. I still felt small.....and worse, I felt fat at the same time. So I said screw this, I was tired of trying to be bigger than everyone else while wanting to be ripped as well. I was trying to compare myself and catch up to guys that are 30 years old while I'm still 24. Moral of the story, I'm 6 years younger than these guys that are a little bigger and more defined than me.....imagine how I can look by the time I'm their age. So now I have dieted down to 203-205 at about 9.5% BF and feel a whole lot better about myself. I'm now at a respectable size and look very comparable to these guys that are 215-220.......so I guess the answer is to stop comparing yourself to everyone else and realize if your young, you've got plenty of time to make quality gains. It's not a race to get huge, your in it for the long haul. :)
 
Holy shit do I feel the pain of this thread. When I hit 240 I get depressed that I don't have abs. When I'm at 220 with abs I think I look like I did when I was 14. So I have not really ever been happy.
What I did was ask some girls I know that are smokin hot what they like... ripped abs. They were all laughing saying how guys always talk about "how much do you bench". Their point was... they never ask that. They could care less. They want to see some abs, nice arms and feel a hard ass.
Needless to say... I have my work cut out for me. I am going to try and get down to 220 and just keep dialing in the abs... thats not a lot of wieght for 6'3" either. Hopefully I will not kill myself when I see how skinny I look... well at least the girls will think I look good when I'm laying in the coffin. LOL.
 
Big Rick Rock said:
I feel you pain bro. I was in the same boat as you. For me it is changing my goals that had made the difference. I got tired of chasing mass and watching my body art(tatoo) morphing, and my skin spliting with every cycle. I'm now more interested in just being healthy now and I'm looking forward to droping about 20lbs-25lbs(fat and muscle) so that I can compete in a contact sport at a weight class where my height won't put me at a disadvantage. I just changed my goals thats all, I enjoy a lot more being a bad ass at the sport I'm practicing that just looking like one.

what sport are you thinking about?


to all with a REAL body image problem the best thing you can do is talk to someone.. maybe a professional maybe a trusted friend or maybe a family member but talking about it and really trying to adress the problem will help. the more time you spend on the boards and the mroe time you research the next great stack or next great suppliment will most likely only enhance the problem.

it is a really fustrating problem because people normally dont believe you.. or think your joking and that doesnt help your best best is to do what big rick rock said and focus on a healthy body not a big body..

good luck
 
Damn, I was thinking about starting this sort of thread!
I'm now 5'9" 233-237 (changes daily for the last week) and still look like I did when graduated high school @ 155-160!!
 
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