getting married need advise

[brickhouse]

here's the deal i am getting married in 3 weeks and i am 24. i have been with her for 5 years and i love her and care about her alot, butt shit i am getting nervous. its like i am asking myself is she the one, am i ready for this. i feal like i have'nt had time to get out and sew my wild outs or some shit. but i also dont want to lose her. because i dont think i could deal with that. any married guys or gals have any advise thanx

 

[Burning_Inside]

well you might as well go with it now, youll find out if shes not "the one" in a few years. Hey it'd only be a few years of your life wasted..Well not entirely, it will always be a learning experience.

 

[KrazyK]

If you feel that way now, think about how you are going to feel in a year or two. I got married 9 months ago and felt the same way, and now it's driving me nuts. But if you really love her, you will find a way to deal with it. Just make sure you are making the right decision, because it's alot easier to get into marraige than it is to get out of it.
Do you two live together now, and how long have you lived together? The biggest piece of advise I can give you is make sure you like living with her first before you get married. That's a big mistake I made, me and my wife only actually lived together for 3 months before we got married. If we had lived together longer I don't think I would have gotten married to her.
Good luck whatever you decide to do, I hope everything works out ok.

 

[Jimsbbc]

I lived with the one I was with for 3 years. It helped us to get to know each other well enough to make a good decision. That is why i broke up with her. I still see her, but we know that it would have been a fucked up marriage, just bc she was so possesive.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Yea, DON'T DO IT!

j/k......well, actually, no I'm not.

Nobody has a crystal ball, yet WE ARE ALL PRETTY GOOD MONDAY MORNING QUARTERBACKS.

I did not have cold feet at all before or on my wedding day. I was shit scared (because I understood the gravity of the commitment), but I was also dead sure (I knew how much I loved him and I knew that my love would not wane...no matter what). Yet, here I am today (just over 11 years and 4 children later) struggling, suffering, and doing my best NOT to let what was not killed out of me - die.

I don't have much else to say except I wish you and your fiance well.

 

[Jimsbbc]

BM,

There's something going on here i am picking up from your posts, but i know it's none of my business.

 

[Bikini Mod]

....nothing going on my brotha - when this novel ends and a new one begins I will share all that I have learned with the brothas and sistahs of elite.

 

[Milhouse]

After 4 years living common law until last fall my advise would be stay away, but anyways what I will say if you are not sure you better make sure before you go down the isle because if not down the road it will cost you and her financially, mentally and spiritually.

Then again like BikiniMom said there basically are no guarantees in life. Shit my dad has been married twice, my aunt 3 times and the funny part is the couple everyone thought would be the first to self destruct was my uncles marriage and yet almost 30 years of marriage they are happy and even further they have been around each other sonce like age 10. And they are in their mid forties. So at least make sure before you make the plunge.

Myself there is a fat chance I will go down that aisle because I just don't feel like it at this point and I have a potential money pit to fall in and I am not giving that up. So if I have kids big chance they will be out of wedlock, not the most responsible thing but not any worse or better than getting hitched and having a divorce.

 

[fistfullofsteel]

well if you weren't married b-mom i would you make love to you and make all your problems go away, but since you are, maybe in another lifetime.

 

[May1010]

Why do you feel the need to involve the government in your personal relationships?