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Farting (feel free to post your thoughts inside)

after coming back from turkey a few weeks back, i managed to get a really bad stomach ache and diarhea for a week.

preworkout routine as always... protein shake, 50mg efedrine, cup of coffee. so walking to the gym, i let one out and shit came out.

had to reverse back home to shower and change...

the moral of the story.. never pop those efedrines until you're 100% certain that you're gonna make it to the gym
 
MikeyG said:
what the fuck satch?! come on now... i was just eating!

wait!!

dont finish your food yet..

i forgot to mention that it was a watery, brownish kinda diarrhea that ran down my leg as i dont wear undies to the gym.

i could have sworn i saw a few tomato pieces in there too.
 
MikeyG said:
:finger:


real nice bro. why wont you tell us the story about u taking it up the ass then?

well ok.....

it all started when you bent over to pick up those dbols you dropeed.

you ass was loose but it was pleasant nonetheless.

clean your dirty ass next time fat boy...

j/k my man.. you know i love you.
 
oh dear

In 7th grade PE class I sat behind the hottest fucking chick. We were doing situps in tight quarters so her head was about where my feet were. On the way up I ripped the loudest gas ever. She wanted me.
 
Lumberg said:
One of the few things I like about being in a club is with all the noise and activity you can fart at will.

Second of all swamp-ass is when your not exactly clean ass crack gets all sweaty and itchy. It's not a fart.


Actually we call that Monkey Butt here......same meaning though.....I was helping a buddy run an electric line to his new hot tub on Saturday morning...and there were some nasty roots in the ground, so I had to take a few swings with the ol' pick ax.....anywho, I had 4 poblano peppers the night before and two cans of chicken that morning......one swing...two swing....three swing.......Frrrrrmmmmmpppppffffffff.......funniest sounding fart ever......and again one swing.....two swing.....frrmmmmpppffffff......uh oh......splatter cakes everywhere......needless to say I was done for the day.....and told I would have to shower before ever using his hot tub.....:D
 
How about the sneeze and fart at the same time farts. Arent those great. I have had some of those bad boys where I was pretty sure my asshole looked like confetti. Those can pack some serious combustion and psi that they hurt. They also happen to be louder than I could scream.
 
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