You are not alone..
Hi again ms ripped..
dont worry, u are not alone in this... there are millions of people everyday struggling with eating disorders...at my school alone i know about 20...
Here is the real deal though... anorexia is totally about control...which i am sure you already know... it is about having a lack of control in your life and attempting to control your food intake because you fell powerless against everything else around you.... for me that lack of power came from my father, my overall competitive nature in everything i did, and my desire for perfectionism. Honestly, i know it is much easier said than dont but in order to get over this you need to give up some of the control you are trying to hold on to with this food thing. The world does not stop turning if you gain weight. There are many people on these boards who can help you but i think you also need to seek professional help. And also, sometimes the way people talk about food and exercise on this board can be very triggering to a recovering eating disordered patient. Many of these people can gain and drop weight in a matter of days but that is because they are knowledgable and know how to do it correctly. Unless you have suffered an eating disorder, you dont really know what the pain of recovery is like. It is a long and hard struggle but I am fully confident in you that you will get better. Binging is a part of recovery. Your body is so starved and since you keep a low carb diet, of course you are going to crave sugar and carbs. You should see a nutritionist and try to come up with a more balanced diet. I know carbs are scary, trust me, but it is way easier to allow yourself a little than to have to eat 5 pizzas at a time. Someoen on this board help me a lot in creating a meal plan for me to help me get control of my eating because i had gotten to the other end of anorexia and become a binge eater. I am eating more carbs now than i can remember in the past 3 years and i feel great. In two weeks i have lost noticable amounts of weight. there are many stories i could tell you but i am sure u have had ur own experiences. right now the best adivice i can give u is to stop dieting and start living. you are only 20 once in your life and you dont deserve to have to spend the best years of your life obsessing about food. tongiht i messed up, i ate a bowl of oatmeal, a few pieces of fruit and 3 nutri grain bars...but tomorrow i am going to wake up and say hey, it was one time,....and just go on with my life.....
luck and love
lemme know if i can help at all...