Bullshit Resume Lines

[Snuka]

I was looking over my most recent resume and found the funniest line that ACTUALLY LANDED ME THE JOB!

Here goes:

"-Helicoptered management initiatives by fabricating source code to generate credit scores for principal lending institutions including...."

A friend of mine who once pumped gas claimed that he was a 'Petroleum Transport Engineer'.

Would anyone else like to contribute a bullshit line from a resume and the job it was for????

 

[Warik]

I took the initiative in creating the Internet.

-Warik

 

[The Varnsen]

DAMN! Where is Al Gore nowdays?

 

[Warik]

Trying to lose those 40lbs he gained.

-Warik