being GAY.

[HumorMe]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: being GAY.

So you must be gay by association, since you posted on it.

Sorry, I have a wife AND kids.

 

[huntmaster]

I too am sorry to hear about your friend ---- I recently lost a friend from High school who I had not seen in a while--He died in a car wreck, very sad.

It is a shame that the people of faith around your friend did not have a positive influence on him----we must remember, people are people--they will let you down. But God will never let you down. I hope that he new Jesus---I wish I could have shared my faith with your friend.

 

[RyanH]

To me, this is a gift. To create love for youself in a culture that officially despises your way of loving, to cultivate wit to disarm the brutal stupidity of moralism, to live with the deaths of friends (because of such suicides, because of AIDS) and not give up living, to learn to make meaning out of difference instead of the homogenized fantasy of assimilated values -- all of that matures the soul and it's the reason so many gay people end up as humanitarian and religious leaders.

very well-said MB. Do you believe there is a large disparity between suicide by gaymen living in rural areas as opposed to sucide by gaymen living in urban areas.

 

[flexed1]

ryan that could be said for interracial couples, trailer trash, really poor folks, etc. we are only in tune to what we wish to be in tune with. sometimes its easier to ignore or make fun of what we don't understand. and do you know how many kids grow up in broken or single family homes? its no easier for them.

 

[Lao Tzu]

I don't want to sound like a rude asshole here... but killing oneself? Isn't that a bit overboard? Does it really SOLVE anything? Are people truly THAT weak? I'm sorry if I am offending anyone, I truly am... It's just, I have a hard time finding sympathy in my heart for those who take the easy way out of life... rather than taking these challenges head on...

The fact that someone is gay... well, that's their choice... but the whole suicide thing.. .come on.

C

its not the easy way out. it is the only logical way to end pain for some people.


all debating aside, does may1010 really have aids?

 

[RyanH]

Telling people who are in the utter black hole of hatred because of their love that they are "weak" simply denies them what they need -- love -- and hastens their death.

I would love to see someone offer a good rebuttal to this statement.

 

[musclebrains]

very well-said MB. Do you believe there is a large disparity between suicide by gaymen living in rural areas as opposed to sucide by gaymen living in urban areas.

I have never seen any statistic in this regard at all. I seem to recall that the suicide rate among adults for both sexual orienations is roughly the same. It is gay teenagers who kill themselves with terrible, exaggerated frequency. I doubt that it matters whether they are in an urban or rural environment.

I spent the first five years of my newspapering career in small and mid-sized cities and I was always surprised by the tolerance of gay people in those environments. Indeed, my own nature felt far more supported in the small town where I was born than in the large cities to which we later moved.

 

[MattTheSkywalker]

Ryan,

i can't rebut it....nor would I want to. I don't disagree.

But somepeople, when faced with hatred or rejection, find a way to channel it into success in some way - they become extremely hard workers as an escape, and succeed, or they hide themselves in their creativity and become famous (Freddie Mercury?).

Yet so many do not. Any idea as to why?

 

[wyst]

The obvious solution is to change your view. But many don't know how.

The question is how do you reach those people? Who is their voice?

Yes! It's like telling a fat person to get in shape and to build up his muscles. That's fine, but how many people have you known over the years who decided they were going to get in shape but failed? Mental strength is much like physical strength. You only reach it through much hard work, and often you can't reach it alone with someone to tell or show you how to go about doing it. Straight people, at least the lucky ones, have role models. Hell, the ones that don't at least have movies and TVs. How many gay men or women have role models around them they can look up to, when so many gay people are in the closet because of the stupid attitude that even shows here on this board all too often? And how many gay people are there on TV or in the movies? And of those, how many are just the comic relief clowns, or Nambla freaks, or the victims in police shows? Don't see many gay action heros, or romantic leads, or strong minded characters. Things are changing, but it's hard growing up with a lac of role models.

You're all right, it is a journey you ultimately make alone, but most of us at least had a little help. Hell, most of us are crazy strong minded anyhow, compared to the average person. How many average Americans or Canadians or whatever have the mental toughness to do the kinds of things that bodybuilders do? Precious few. As in fitness, so in life. I feel sad for people that are out of shape physically, and I try to help them by being an example and by telling them how I got in shape, when they ask. I suggest that it might be good to ahve the same kind of empathy for people lacking in mental toughness too, and to try and help them along too, instead of judging them.

Okay, that sounded really pompous, sorry.



I almost erased it, but the I thought, what the hell, I *do* think it's true.

Wyst

 

[RyanH]

ryan that could be said for interracial couples, trailer trash, really poor folks, etc. we are only in tune to what we wish to be in tune with. sometimes its easier to ignore or make fun of what we don't understand. and do you know how many kids grow up in broken or single family homes? its no easier for them.

Flexed, what reaction do you generally expect when you tell someone that you are gay?