Do You Have to be Ruthless to be Financially Successful?

[rudeboyja]

No. You help people up the ladder, you don't push them back down.

I make a lot of cash because I help others also make money..

 

[Smurfy]

What you're saying is a truly decent person can become financially successful IF they start young enough, have enough ambition, are willing to work seriously hard, and are personable. Okay, I'll buy that.

As a follow up on that thought: Do you believe a person can be highly financially successful and have a very fulfilling personal life, i.e., happy marriage, good relationship with kids?
The person you're describing is going to be putting no less than 50+ hours a week in the office (or perhaps 80+). I do not believe you can have a good relationship with your kids or spouse if you're spending most of your awake hours at work. You can have a cordial relationship with your family, certainly, but happy? Happiness, particularly when it comes to kids, means spending relaxed quality time with them.

I'm sure it was stressful at times, but my Dad did it.

 

[Bikini Mod]

I'm sure it was stressful at times, but my Dad did it.

That's the goal for me and the Old Grump as well.

 

[Razorguns]

Unfortunately, nobody gave me or my current husband that lesson when we were 18. Now I am 43 and he is 54. Our total household income peaked at well under $100k a few years ago and has only been creeping down ever since. He doesn't want to start over in a new company and neither of us is willing to give up his paid time off.

The only goal we've set is that when he gets old enough to cash in his 401K and pension we're pulling up stakes, selling the house, and starting over somewhere warm. The idea of retirement is out of the question and the house was a piss-poor investment from the word go. I just hope the sale makes enough to pay off the mortgage.

C'est la vie.

I'm just curious if my instincts on this issue are correct. That you make certain choices, and in our society something always suffers, either your personal life or professional success.

It seems that you can be happy personally and a devoted parent but you'll probably only ever be professionally mediocre, at best, if that's the choice you make.

Don't forget the meaning of life: Happiness.

Happiness is easy to achieve. Either have none of the money. Or all of it.

I could go to Alaska, have a hot chick, and live in a cabin for the rest of my life with a guitar - and die a happy man. Money would mean nothing to me.

..or.. achieve 'financial independence'. This is where you don't sweat bills, rent, mortgages, job stress, loans, etc.

For smart middle classers - this was easy. Getting a job in something they love (i'd advocated this from day one here). I know career military, cops, docs, lawyers, vets, shop owners, musicians who LOVE their careers. And they never had to be millionaires.

To fix one's life (which you must before you tackle on the ungodly complex task of making millions - trust me, it's a LOT of work) -- requires nothing more than sitting down and taking a good hard look at yourself.

Make goals. Make plans. Write them down. Find out what makes you happy. Research. Write down problems. Tackle them on ONE by ONE. Create a positive attitude that all those problems ARE solved. Your subconcious will work with you and figure out the answers one by one. While you remain focused on just enjoying life.

Once all that is cleared up. THEN you can focus on more complex tasks - like trying to make gobs of money. I could never write a song, or shoot a film - if I was always worried about a car payment, or hating a day job.

It's not hard. Just takes time and patience and resolve to NOT ACCEPT YOUR CURRENT REALITY.

The last part is something one should tattoo on their heart and ingrain in their subconsious.

r

 

[hanselthecaretaker]

^^^ this I agree with

Every time I don't listen to my gut or break my own rules I screw myself or get screwed.

Uh huh, go on.....

 

[Wulfgar]

you just need to understand the nature of the business you are in. Recognizing opportunity and acting upon it is a skill one develops like any other.
Also cutting overhead is a huge proponent of successful business. I outsource all my data input overseas. Utilize as many cheap advertising techiques as possible. look for any kickback to institute in my company no matter how small it is. etc..

opportunity is around all of us. you just cant let fear and stupidity get in the way of seizing it.

 

[javaguru]

This question keeps cropping up in my mind. I honestly do not know anyone IRL who is really financially successful. Excluding something like a talent for investing, does a person who is REALLY making serious bank need to be at least a little ruthless?

Only when you know that you're getting screwed. Goodwill does go a very long way in a business relationship but it has to go both ways.

 

[chazk]

This question keeps cropping up in my mind. I honestly do not know anyone IRL who is really financially successful. Excluding something like a talent for investing, does a person who is REALLY making serious bank need to be at least a little ruthless?

as lennon said in his song working class hero
" they say there is plenty of room on the top of the hill ,but first you must learn to smile as you kill "

 

[75th]

No, not at all.

I wouldnt consider myself financially successful in the way you are probably thinking, but I get along just fine...and I know that if I keep going at this rate I will reach a level of financial "success" that I think many people would be comfortable with. Nothing major, but respectable. Nor I or the people I work with (who make much more than I do) are cutthroat in any way. Im getting to be successful by treating my clients well and by making sure the people that work for me are successful. If they make money, I make money.

But yeah, it depends on your line of work.

 

[Spartacus]

If you have to be ruthless and/or screw others over to make a buck

you will never have enough