Well, bouncer-soldier. I'm not gonna be drunk, and I don't plan on wearing green. I reckon I've worn enough of it in various forms of camoflage over the years, so please forgive me.
There is always a nice St. Patrick's Day celebration here in Moscow every year, though! The Irish Ambassador and St. Andrew's Society always put a lot of time and careful planning into it. I'll say this about the Ambassador, he surely places a lot of emphasis on Irish matters, that's a fact. He's a very approachable fellow, too.
But I don't think anybody you know will be attending this year, as if they even understood what St. Patrick's Day is. It's mainly a foreign expatriate event.
Enjoy your holiday.
Dexter