Who were you in high school and

[hardrock]

Stoner. Was friends with everyone.

 

[velvett]

Needless to say now I don't relate well to people, don't like most people, am shy & prefer to be alone & am not trusting at all.....what happened to me in hs still hurts to this day & I'll be 35 in July....I was in therapy for quite a long time but the hurt is still there.....

Wow, I'm really sorry to hear that.

 

[velvett]

does it add up?

your high school experience equates well to the personality you have on here, except i wouldn't have guessed the class clown and prankster part. not that you're not funny(you are), it's just that it takes a certain amount of inner-spaz to act out like that. i haven't seen you spaz out on here that i can remember. that was interesting to read.

Yes, actually it does.

I know what you mean about college being "the antithesis of highschool which depressed the living shit out of me considering it's supposed to be the other way around". I did a total of 3 first semesters at 3 different schools and if it didn't gel the 3rd time around I would have truly lost my mind. (Petty sure I did lose it for a while and somehow found myself before too many people noticed).

Actually come to think of it life after 30 has been the best - 20's just sucked ass. High school I was younger, stronger more capable to bounce back - the thick skin vanished from about 18-27.

I've always been in touch with my inner-spaz and klutz for that matter.

I think being a clown was simply a way of keep my private feelings and insecurities hidden and to keep the air in the light if you know what I mean. As far as being a pankster - it was a great way to make a point or aid at being a clown.



Hmm I haven't been called a spaz in at least ten years.

 

[sconoscuito]

basketball player, I got lotta hype my jr year when I moved into new state and joined this private hs.... however I guess I picked the wrong school and the coach didnt seem to be as cool as he first appeared, as a matter of fact he lied to me, so I quit both years from the team since I couldnt get along with anyone on the team and that includes the coach...

the kids a private school were real fake, gay and bunch of pussies... unfurtuntly i was friends with every single one of them and all of them were friends with me, except about 5-6 dudes from the bball team, this guys had to be the biggest losers I've met in my life... the whole school didnt like them, they had no friends what so ever... just bunch of smart rich guys who stayed together and had gay orgies... as a matter of fact I dont even know what they did but they never partied and thought they were cool for that.. most of them despite the fact that they were basketball players never got asked to dances and half of them didnt even go to prom....

and as far as basketball goes, we had a losing team both years... wonder why

and they are gettin even worse now


either way, now im at a jr college playin bball and gotta say this black kids are lot more friendly, understanding, warm whatver you wanna call it than those panzy ass rich hs kids... especially the ones on my team... maybe its cause Im from a different culture but I dont know there was definetly something wrong with kids at hs

now about 90% of those people from hs that used to be best friends dont ever even talk to each other anymore, it was just a bunch of fake friendships, fake relationships ... whatver you wanna call it

I did party alot and got lotta bjs from girls so that helped me get through that piece of shit place...I always thought I could get any girl and I was kinda stuck up I guess when it came to girls but tell you the truth that was only cause I was kinda shy and only wanted the hottest girls

so now I learned how to not be a true bitchass thanks to my hs..

 

[sconoscuito]

oh and I did manage keep a few good friends from hs, some are still in touch but that just cause they just wanna drink and partty so no real friendship or anything

 

[Buddy_Christ]

Jens - i know how you feel. i was shoved into catholic school for 1-3 grade. i was then given the choice of catholic school or public school (probably because my dad didn't want to pay for it anymore) and i chose public school. from 4-6, i was a complete outsider. short, blond, and i wore glasses. in grade school, you wear glasses, you're a nerd. no questions asked. your only friends were other kids with glasses or the few others that were considered to be nerds and no one wanted to talk to them. i was made fun of a lot when all i simply tried to do was make friends. on top of that my mother was such a bitch that a few times before the age of 12 i wanted to take my own life, but obviously didn't.

7th grade was slightly better because it was a different school. 8th grade was worse. i won't even go there. just remembering it is enough to make me want to kill.......and now i've remembered it.

you're not alone Jen. i'm 26 now and there's still people from when i was 14 that if i ran into now, i'd tear them limb from limb. every time i go down into the area i grew up in i pray to just run into one of them. just one. that's all it'll take. just to even see one of those people. i'd snap. completely. no question. and then i'd want more of them. while i might hold back from killing them, i sure as hell would make them feel pain like they've never felt before, and i'd laugh while they screamed.

oh, and when i was in 9th grade, we had the most popular kid in junior high blow his brains out one morning before school (our junior high was 7, 8, 9th grades). he did it at home. he had been one of the people that had made smartass comments to me in grade school. i felt no sympathy for him. i've battled my own inner demons, but i've won every time, which has just made me stronger.

well, gotta dig out the junior high yearbooks now and see if i happen to have any pictures of my mother. good thing i still have ammo. looks like there's going to be another range trip tomorrow.

thanks velvett.

 

[velvett]

thanks velvett.

I'm sorry !


I just thought it would give insight about all of us to each other.

 

[jenscats5]

Wow, I'm really sorry to hear that.

Yeah, thanks....it sucks to a certain extent....it just takes me longer to relate to people but after seeing the dark side of most for all that time & the teachers that told me the bullying was my fault (WTF???) it's hard to see people in a good light.....

My hubby thinks I'm a freak cuz I love my cats so much & never did or do want kids. If I had a kid who I found out treated other kids the way they treated me --- I'd do a Bill Cosby -- kill em cuz I can make a new one just like ya...

 

[sigweed]

i was the shy, athletic, smart guy.

ditto
except my sports were tennis, squash, skiing and vball... so i was kinda outside the jock clique

 

[jenscats5]

Jens - i know how you feel. i was shoved into catholic school for 1-3 grade. i was then given the choice of catholic school or public school (probably because my dad didn't want to pay for it anymore) and i chose public school. from 4-6, i was a complete outsider. short, blond, and i wore glasses. in grade school, you wear glasses, you're a nerd. no questions asked. your only friends were other kids with glasses or the few others that were considered to be nerds and no one wanted to talk to them. i was made fun of a lot when all i simply tried to do was make friends. on top of that my mother was such a bitch that a few times before the age of 12 i wanted to take my own life, but obviously didn't.

7th grade was slightly better because it was a different school. 8th grade was worse. i won't even go there. just remembering it is enough to make me want to kill.......and now i've remembered it.

you're not alone Jen. i'm 26 now and there's still people from when i was 14 that if i ran into now, i'd tear them limb from limb. every time i go down into the area i grew up in i pray to just run into one of them. just one. that's all it'll take. just to even see one of those people. i'd snap. completely. no question. and then i'd want more of them. while i might hold back from killing them, i sure as hell would make them feel pain like they've never felt before, and i'd laugh while they screamed.

oh, and when i was in 9th grade, we had the most popular kid in junior high blow his brains out one morning before school (our junior high was 7, 8, 9th grades). he did it at home. he had been one of the people that had made smartass comments to me in grade school. i felt no sympathy for him. i've battled my own inner demons, but i've won every time, which has just made me stronger.

well, gotta dig out the junior high yearbooks now and see if i happen to have any pictures of my mother. good thing i still have ammo. looks like there's going to be another range trip tomorrow.

thanks velvett.

Crak -- thanks bor!! Sorry but glad you can relate.

What's so very sad is that I can truly understand what kids who bring a gun to school & shoot fellow students, etc feel like.......If I could've had access to rapid fire machine guns I would've brought one to school & killed every single person I saw.....and not regretted it...