The Wrong Motivation

[p60]

Lately going to the gym has been getting much worse. I dread the drive to the gym, and when I get there it doesn't get better. I have to drag myself thru my workouts and its a boring hell.
Infact I'm getting so sick of lifting that lately I've been skipping some workouts.

Then when I thought about it, I realized why I'm not liking this anymore..

because lately I've been doing it for the wrong reasons.

when I started lifting I was in high school sports, and it gave me a thrill do it it, because I was working towards a goal to get on the varsity team or something. It thrilled me to see lifting gains, and I loved it every day.

Somewhere along the timeline, I made a transition. Eventually the entire focus of the weight room became to improve my appearances. At first this was fun, and I enjoyed working towards getting an elite body, (which in my mind was a 5% bodyfat 165 lb 5'8" pimping stud)
after awhile though, this has become an incredible bore. I stopped trying to lose fat after I got down to 10%, and now I'm basically out of goals.
I have no desire to put on anymore size at all. Mainly because I don't really get as much of a thrill out of doing that anymore, and also because I don't want to give myself an image thats easy to stereotype. (yes i worry what other ppl think about me)


so basically I realized that all I'd been doing these last few months was maintaining myself, going in the weight room, lifting the exact same weight every week, trying to lift more sometimes but can't because I don't want to grow more muscle thus I'm not eating enough,
and well basically I'm getting real sick of it.

Trying to keep that certain exact body type that the ladies want seems like a really stupid goal, and the fun in it lasts for a few months, then it becomes a boredom from hell.


The ironic part is that I wasn't even doing this for the 'puss' either. I'm not the average guy, and I have strict moral values, like not having sex before marriage.
So pretty much the only reason why I was doing this was more so for dating, and that girls would maybe like me more.

Then I learned something. The guy has to ask the girl out in all cases, and that I need to work on my personality WAY more than anything else.
I realized that personality matters way more in a relationship on both ends, for my purposes, and that truthfully I shouldn't be so focused and obsessed about appearances, and that as long as they are good i should be fine.

I'd been trying to be a perfectionist all summer, and now I've realized why I hate tanning, hate lifting just for looks, etc.
Because I'm simply not that kind of a person!



But now for the real question and reason for why I made this post,

what should I do now? this affects everything I stood for, and this realization is too much for me.

lets see, here were the other reasons why I lifted:

1. It was exercise (although I'd much rather do cardio, and that is better exercise)

2. It makes me stronger (but since i'm not in sports anymore or dont get in fights much i rarely need the strength)

3. It was a fun hobby to try to lift more each week. (for some reason that just isnt fun anymore)

I dunno, I still think I should do a little lifting, just because it is good for you, but I want to back off a lot.

Do you guys have any ideas for what I should do?

or should I just bug off because I'm obviously not the body builder type, and dont have that desire

 

[Pamela]

I think you may need a break from the gym.

Try doing something outside for fun, like ride a bike
or go on long walks or runs.

Don't ever give it up completly...
Your body and mind just needs a break from your regular
routine.

Good Luck

Pamela

 

[Mysterio]

Look it's P60! So how have the women been treating you?

 

[p60]

alright. i'd have to agree on that one.


but when I come back what should my prime source of motivation be? lol.

with highschool sports gone, getting stronger doesnt give quite the thrills anymore.
strength gains are fun to see, but its almost like i need a bigger reason to do it.
and the other thing is im worried about getting too muscular and giving the wrong impression to ppl. for sure I don't want to look like a muscle head, but now I'm questioning whether I want to even look like a 'player' or not.

anyways, even if i was trying to look like a 'player' i am burnt out from doing that right now.

and maintenance lifting sucks horribly.

 

[p60]

Look it's P60! So how have the women been treating you?

i dunno,
im just back for the hell of it cuz i needed to ask this,

hey,
sorry for rippin on you earlier.

 

[Mysterio]

So you want the athletic look not so much to look like BB?

 

[Mysterio]

i dunno,
im just back for the hell of it cuz i needed to ask this,

hey,
sorry for rippin on you earlier.

Ripped on who me? I don't recall P60.

 

[p60]

Ripped on who me? I don't recall P60.

oh whoops, nm i must have been thinking of someone else.

yea, im going for more of the athletic look than the bodybuilder look.

lately working out for appearances solely though has been very boring and unfufilling tho.

 

[Testo]

Dont sweat it mate, i have phases where i hate going to the gym (but still go) and then phases where i love going and actually look forward to it usually while on the juice or after ending a relationship

Maybe take a week off and see how you feel, you will most likely miss it and want to get back into it asap.

good luck bro.

 

[TheProject]

I agree, taking some time off from the gym sounds like a good plan to me. You may be a bit overtrained.

Secondly, have you considered switching to a PL-style split, and setting your sights on a meet? If you worked out for high school sports before, this might be something that would get you motivated.

 

[p60]

i guess the problem is that I don't really have a goal physique for myself, and I think it's weird trying to achieve one.

I think the sport of bodybuilding is weird in trying to become a massive artistic statue, and I guess it just doesn't appeal to me, lol.
lifting to become stronger did appeal to me back when I was playing football.

I don't know if power lifting is really my thing. I dont know if it would really interest me that much.
Sports are more interesting to me. Maybe thats what I should be doing more of.

Another thing is that I don't want to become big, there is just this stereotype that goes along with big ppl that I just don't want to have to deal with.
call me weak, call me someone who cares too much about what others think,
but I simply dont think its worth it for me, to try to become really strong or really big, when its going to change my image to one that gets stereotyped.

I think the only real solution for me here, is just to lift to be healthy for now, and if I want to do more later then ill go for it.



Report

 

[plornive]

Another thing is that I don't want to become big, there is just this stereotype that goes along with big ppl that I just don't want to have to deal with.
call me weak, call me someone who cares too much about what others think,
but I simply dont think its worth it for me, to try to become really strong or really big, when its going to change my image to one that gets stereotyped.

I think the stereotype of big and muscular people is changing. Anyway, it is possible to maintain a medium sized, lean musculature with a few one-hour workouts per week. You could bike, play football with friends, etc. to stay lean and cardiovascularly fit. Then just hit the gym a few times per week for an hour. I don't see why you are analyzing this so much.

 

[Stuey01]

Join a sports team, just because you don't play high school sport anymore doesn't mean you can't play sport. Is there not a local league of whatever sport you are into, find a team, join up and train for that.

Stu.

 

[HappyScrappy]

I like how people say that they don't want to "become big"

as if one night you go to sleep at 130lbs, and then the next day you wake up at 300lbs and shredded, having to carry that burden around with you, unable to shake that newfound size.