Some thoughts on measuring size progress. As mentioned, I find it extremely useful to chart measurements atleast once a year, with pictures if possible. Strength is easy enough to keep track of, but size doesnt always come with strength gains. Seeing myself all the time and the gains being so slow and gradual, I found that my mind eventually got extremely warped when it came to the perception of my size.
Early on, for the first few years, I felt like housewives were larger than me (at one point they were) and that swarzenegger was fucking massive in his movies. Conan, etc. It seemed unobtainable back then. Now I see him as well built with good shape but not that big. Focusing so much on massive measurements and seeing myself change so much has kept my perspective constantly changing. I still see myself very small but Ive noticed my other perspectives have changed. Now those that looked massive to me dont look that big anymore. Yet I still see myself as small.
The reason I wear that large shirt while training, is because I want to eliminate any mental interruptions. Meaning I dont want to have those arguments in my mind during training, debating whether Im losing size. This used to fuck with my head and my energy levels during training. This eliminates that issue completely. It takes alot of size loss or gain to be noticable in that shirt. Its important to have your mind right with that type of training. If Im leaner with more detail, then I wont look as large in a big shirt, so then I might switch back to tank tops. Im always looking to avoid mental distraction. I have enough demons without any help.
So my perception has become even more warped over time. Thats why I would reccomend taking pictures and measurements atleast once a year. Its important to keep in mind a few things about measurements and scale weight though. Some are very basic, but others are easy to miss.
Measurements can be decieving. When measuring its good to take relaxed and flexed measurements. However you want to measure at the same points in the muscle. If you change where you measure on the muscle, the measurement will change. The idea for me, atleast, is to always measure the largest point of the muscle circumference. For chest, the tape is high up in the arm pits, above the nipples, but try to avoid having the tape bend in the arm pits when the arms are down. With this measurement it can be inconsistant since its such a large space to measure and the tape doesnt always stay straight. I use a mirror but its never perfect. Also keep in mind that if your gut and waist measurements are increasing, then some of those other increases may be fat and not muscle.
The key is consistancy. It doesnt matter how anyone else measures themselves. It matters how you measure shit consistantly. When I post my measurements its based on how Ive been measuring myself, keeping tape as straight as possible. Here is something thats easy to miss though. When you take a measurement of a muscle, you are only measuring a very narrow vertical strip of that muscle (the largest part). You are missing all the other mass around the bicep and tricep, chest, etc. The muscle does not just grow around the largest part. For example, my elbow circumference has grown ALOT. I dont measure that. My lower bicep has grown alot. I dont measure it. Never expect muscle growth to be that linear. If you dont see the largest part of the muscle growing, it may be growing in other areas. I wouldnt go crazy with measuring every segment, but this is just something to keep in mind. You may still be growing in other areas you dont measure. This is why I take two measurements for my waist. Navel and waistline. They vary by alot. You would need to tattoo markers on your body in segments to try and pinpoint each section for accurate measurements. Would be very difficult to do. Not needed.
With alot of muscles, like the bicep. If the bicep has a good peak, then the shape will be very uneven. Similiar shape to a human heart. Impossible to measure without some gapping on the tape. These measurements are never perfect. Ive had my relaxed arm measurement grow by an inch, without effecting my flexed measurement. Cant say why, but clearly things occur that are not easily captured with a few measurements. As mentioned, the tape only shows about a one inch horizontal width.
Regarding scale weight. Scale weight is very easy to understand how inaccurate it can be. You have water retention, undigested food in gut, fat, muscle, etc. You can weigh yourself the same time everyday, even if you have a consistant sleep and shitting schedule, but it doesnt matter. You dont completely empty out every time you shit. All these tools should be used together to try and get an idea of whats going on, thats it. Never good to get too obsessed with that. Ive had times where my muscular measurements were the largest and I got lighter, and vice versa. Ive had alot of things that I tried to make sense of, with bodyweight and measurements, that I couldnt figure out. Dont focus too much on that shit. Just keep doing what you know works. Focus on the future of what you will become.
For me, I knew that I had to transcend my humanity in a way. I felt the need to leave everything I was behind. To completely evolve my mind and body into that of this hellish beast. I wasnt interested in any type of normal attractive look, but what attracted me was this vicious demon like image of what I would become. I hated myself and how I felt, the frailty, but I didnt focus on that shit. Even at 105-115 lbs when I started. I focused on what I knew I would force to happen. My mind and body has evolved to the point where I dont really connect or relate to who I was, even 5 and 10 years ago. This was just how I dealt with my demons but I dont look to use that power for violence anymore, like I did. I keep people at a distance, move through and seek things related to training and food when Im out. If someone works hard to get in my way, Ill remove them from my path, but Im hyper focused on assassinating the goals that I set forth. My hate and rage is still peak level, but Ive numbed out to people moving around me. Someone has to make an effort to engage me. For the most part, that energy goes into my training. Thats why it is such a powerful vent for me, and like an exorcism for my demons. My wiring never allowed me to connect with other humans, and it goes back to the beginning for me. I became more obsessed with a animal like viciousness and something that was terrifying beyond human language. Fucked up images I had in my mind. So it comes from a dark place with alot of hate, but it is alot better than the alternative, if I never found that vent. Im not one to stay on topic. This is just for those that either dont connect with other people or have issues or goals that they deal with through training. Whatever the case may be. I try to give a deeper more detailed insight into my perspective.
Its never a good solution however as it will end in alot of pain and misery. Ive never found a way to deal with my demons otherwise, and when I am unable to do what I do, that demonic possession will reach full force. I havent yet found a way to cope otherwise. Thats why I never pursued long life. My mind is pure fucking chaos when I dont train. Every negative, hateful feeling amplified 1000 times. So I would advise others to seek spiritual strength and things that truly matter. Not just physical power and size. That shit will all be gone and eventually you have to deal with who you are underneath.
Im a christian but not in the typical way. I dont present myself in that way because I dont feel that I am in a position to represent what I believe in. My demons are way too outward. My belief doesnt come from a book solely. It comes from some personal miracles I experienced in my own life. It was something very profound and the timing was too perfect to be a coincidence. I believe that the truth will present itself, and never needs to be forced down anyones throat. That shit never works anyway.
KILL THAT SHIT !!
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