really fucking depressed today

[bigmann245]

im sorry everyone but I have been so depressed lately its not funny. I need to do something but have no motivation to do it. it just seams that so much crap piles on at the same time. I think im taking on too much. but its not just that. there are so freegin many little things, unnecessary things happening. im trying to hold it together but I feel it all coming apart. I am going to break down very soon.


sorry for venting but I am at my wits end...........

 

[H_T_]

being one of the most depressed people on the planet myself, i'll start with hang in there. it'll get better. you can change things to fix this. try and find the triggers. but, above all, hang in there, all problems are temporary.

 

[lickin lollypops]

Here's a and a BIG HUG for both of you!

 

[bigmann245]

thanks humantarget. im trying. it seams so hard right now but im trying.

lickin lollypops your a sweety. thanks for the pick me up...

 

[bigmann245]

im going to bed. sometimes i feel it might be better i dont wake. but everyday like clockwork i do. freegin alarms....

 

[H_T_]

thanks humantarget. im trying. it seams so hard right now but im trying.

lickin lollypops your a sweety. thanks for the pick me up...

fuck yeah, it's hard. but it's nothing you can't fix. one thing you might try is to talk it out or write it down. making something tangible can help you sort it out and then you can make a plan.

 

[lickin lollypops]

lickin lollypops your a sweety. thanks for the pick me up...

No problem sweets! Everyone goes through rough patches once in awhile...

 

[H_T_]

im going to bed. sometimes i feel it might be better i dont wake. but everyday like clockwork i do. freegin alarms....

wow, bro. i was thinking that exact thought earlier. but, fuck it, you might win the lotto or save someones life today..........

 

[bigmann245]

fuck yeah, it's hard. but it's nothing you can't fix. one thing you might try is to talk it out or write it down. making something tangible can help you sort it out and then you can make a plan.

i had someone to talk it out with but for some reason they have distanced themselve from me. i cant blame this person. i would have too. but sometimes you need someone to talk to.

 

[DieselGunz]

Does the gym help?

 

[H_T_]

i had someone to talk it out with but for some reason they have distanced themselve from me. i cant blame this person. i would have too. but sometimes you need someone to talk to.

human contact is a nice thing. isolation or not having a voice is worse than any torture. maybe that person is as overwhelmed as you. space sounds like a good thing right now, but try talking to a friend or even a phone call to a family member.

 

[Lestat]

hang in there man, you are alive, able to talk to us here... you've got something.. things can always get better, and will in time.

 

[RADAR]

get some St John's wort its a mood enhancer , feeling good about yourself is what matters!



RADAR

 

[BrothaBill]

im going to bed. sometimes i feel it might be better i dont wake. but everyday like clockwork i do. freegin alarms....

Yeah, thats the shitty part maing, you can never die, you kill yourself, you just wake up in the hospital, believe me Ive tried, just goes on and on, just make shitty karma for yourself and those around you. It never ends, you kill yourself in this reality, you simply wake up tomorrow having been saved in the nick of time in a new reality, only shittier.
Think about it, you make wake up in a reality with a half brain damaged unable to wipe yourself. See, every reality you leap to when you die is like spinning the big wheel.
Your problems wont be solved by not waking up, b/c its like Groundhog day, you'll always wake up no matter what, trust me, deal with it, or be eternally damned to repeat the same stupid problems over and over again til you just solve them and move on towards enlightenment

I am, of course, talking to you only, a soul out of time, we've both died and we both know it, what its like on the other side. From one to another, you shouldve gotten the instructions and the visions on the other side of the tunnel, which is a very poor euphemism, at least for my journey

Movin around the world and daydream of days that money brings
Chasin material assumin that it's happiness inside
You think that you could buy a better life, no matter the price
But you still, haven't found
Haven't found what you're lookin for
Because I been many places, seen many faces
Shook many hands and mixed with many races
From nowhere to Bombay, did it my way
Got my style from the ghetto, took it straight to Broadway
Been around the world I stepped on seven continents 20 millions later, I settled the score
0
0
We gotta, make a move, by any means necessary
From January and January to January
Look out my window it's a robbery
People still put they ones in the lottery
Big fish always try to eat the small fish
They do anything just to get their last wish
War in the East, there's war in the West
War down South I stay war 'pon the rest
As it's been said, let it be done
And there's nothing new underneath the sun
So we preserve what's destined to come
And share our thoughts and blessings with our daughters and sons

And you stillllll, haven't found, what you're lookin forrrrrrrr
And you stillllll, haven't found, what you're lookin forrrrrrrr
Haven't found what you're lookin for

 

[Razorguns]

im sorry everyone but I have been so depressed lately its not funny. I need to do something but have no motivation to do it. it just seams that so much crap piles on at the same time. I think im taking on too much. but its not just that. there are so freegin many little things, unnecessary things happening. im trying to hold it together but I feel it all coming apart. I am going to break down very soon.


sorry for venting but I am at my wits end...........

Do what i do. Fuck everything. Go into the room, pop in my favorite movie or tv show dvd, put on some incense -- grab some good grub and forget about everything.

When life gets too fast -- slow it the fuck down. Tackle problems the next day .. one by one.

Good luck.

 

[jack sparrow]

Dude, you got all your limbs, legs, arms, fingers toes, and a mind to think with. Those things in itself are a reason to feel good. With those tools, you can do anything. Put them all to work on something you enjoy, and you will find yourself smiling every now and then.

 

[BUBBLES]

Dude, you got all your limbs, legs, arms, fingers toes, and a mind to think with. Those things in itself are a reason to feel good. With those tools, you can do anything. Put them all to work on something you enjoy, and you will find yourself smiling every now and then.

That is exactly how I see the situation too and I don't know why some people get so depressed. A chemical imbalance it must be because no matter how much you tell them the positive side of life depression gets hold of them and they are beat.

I have a friend who is depressed for no reason whatsoever and yet to her it is the end of the world. Its really confusing!!!!!

 

[jack sparrow]

That is exactly how I see the situation too and I don't know why some people get so depressed. A chemical imbalance it must be because no matter how much you tell them the positive side of life depression gets hold of them and they are beat.

I have a friend who is depressed for no reason whatsoever and yet to her it is the end of the world. Its really confusing!!!!!

I'm just happy to walk, talk, and make people laugh. Other than that, making my way and taking care of businiss is all that really matters to me. The rest of the time is my time. I call the shots and I make all the descisions. I kinda like it.

 

[BUBBLES]

I'm just happy to walk, talk, and make people laugh. Other than that, making my way and taking care of businiss is all that really matters to me. The rest of the time is my time. I call the shots and I make all the descisions. I kinda like it.

I am exactly the same way and I wish others were the same.

It drives me nuts when people are always negative about their life FOR NO REASON WHAT SO EVER .

 

[bigmann245]

all i have to say is wow. this is why i love this board. i figured id wake up to a bunch of flames. but you guys are awesome. jack schitt, that means a lot to me considering what all went down between us. i truely mean that.

everyone else i am so thankful for the help and encouragement. just when everything is going smooth it seems like shit falls apart one after another. im not going to get into details but it seams like shit is crumbling down faster than i can pick up the pieces. some days i feel just let it crumble down, no sense in trying to keep it going when its just going to fall anyways. i try do hard each and everyday, but i just keep getting kicked in the teeth. ive been screwed over by so many so called friends its not funny. but dumb ass me goes right back out and makes friends with different people just to have it happen all over again. i give the shirt off my back. i even offered one friend my job cause he needed the money cause he got laid off (this was a part time job i got so that when i got out of the navy i had a job to go to). he told me no that i work too hard and thats not him. then he fucked me over and almost got me kicked out the military with a bad conduct discharge. i even went to jail for a night cause of him and i didnt even see it comming. but again, i go out and make friends and get kicked in the teeth all over again. i never learn. sometimes i feel im better off alone.

 

[stilleto]

i'll surprise you too... hang in there.... tough times are temporary. you'll look back on it and think "it wasn't that bad" or "i'm glad thats over", but it will be over and things will be better.

 

[bigmann245]

i'll surprise you too... hang in there.... tough times are temporary. you'll look back on it and think "it wasn't that bad" or "i'm glad thats over", but it will be over and things will be better.

i hate waiting for that time to come. but you are right. i just got to keep thinking one day at a time. but im a planner and i cant do the one day at a time. i look to far ahead. i suck.....

 

[stilleto]

i hate waiting for that time to come. but you are right. i just got to keep thinking one day at a time. but im a planner and i cant do the one day at a time. i look to far ahead. i suck.....

you do, yes.
its ok to plan, look ahead, or not know what tomorrow will bring. for now, know that your place right NOW is in limbo, and nothing else.
but you still suck.

 

[bigmann245]

you do, yes.
its ok to plan, look ahead, or not know what tomorrow will bring. for now, know that your place right NOW is in limbo, and nothing else.
but you still suck.

seriously bad too.... lol

 

[Tytan]

Hang in there bro....you gotta work through this shit and you know it...there is no alternative and only you can change whatever situation you are in...

 

[StickFigure]

im sorry everyone but I have been so depressed lately its not funny. I need to do something but have no motivation to do it. it just seams that so much crap piles on at the same time. I think im taking on too much. but its not just that. there are so freegin many little things, unnecessary things happening. im trying to hold it together but I feel it all coming apart. I am going to break down very soon.


sorry for venting but I am at my wits end...........

You know i'm always a phone call away orb.

 

[jrlex]

im sorry everyone but I have been so depressed lately its not funny. I need to do something but have no motivation to do it. it just seams that so much crap piles on at the same time. I think im taking on too much. but its not just that. there are so freegin many little things, unnecessary things happening. im trying to hold it together but I feel it all coming apart. I am going to break down very soon.


sorry for venting but I am at my wits end...........

Try this bro....if you have the weekends off, take a friday off and have an extended weekend. But get away form everything and everyone..Get a room at a nerby town, and go out to a restaurantand mingle with the locals..Even if you can,'t picture yourself doing it just do it....sometimes a change of scenery and enviornment is all some people need..

I remember when my Ex would be ranting about shit I would just leave and change the sceanery...fucken worked wonders for me..

 

[bigmann245]

well this weekend im probably hooking up with MTS for the florida georgia game and party. then onnthe 18th of next month im going to the atlanta ef meetup. hopefully i can start moving on with my life after a bit of relaxing times.

 

[hanselthecaretaker]

im sorry everyone but I have been so depressed lately its not funny. I need to do something but have no motivation to do it. it just seams that so much crap piles on at the same time. I think im taking on too much. but its not just that. there are so freegin many little things, unnecessary things happening. im trying to hold it together but I feel it all coming apart. I am going to break down very soon.


sorry for venting but I am at my wits end...........

Yeah bro I've had a few days like that, but squarin up and saying "fuck it" pushing forward will make you feel better.

 

[jrlex]

well this weekend im probably hooking up with MTS for the florida georgia game and party. then onnthe 18th of next month im going to the atlanta ef meetup. hopefully i can start moving on with my life after a bit of relaxing times.

You're going to MTS's party? Fuck you mang! after a night with Matt there's no fucken way you'll be depressed so eat me you fucker.

Go Gators.

 

[Cutiebaby]

hang in there bigmann times get rough but eventually they turn around for the good

 

[bigmann245]

thanks angel. im trying.

and MTS thanks bro. you know why. i needed that.

 

[Sub-Zero]

im depressed but not depressed at the same time, i recommend drugs, and more drugs to deal with the effects of the drugs

 

[Sassy69]

well this weekend im probably hooking up with MTS for the florida georgia game and party. then onnthe 18th of next month im going to the atlanta ef meetup. hopefully i can start moving on with my life after a bit of relaxing times.

These were the things I was gonna bring up. Sometimes when the regular business of the day just isn't making you feel satisfaction, you need to set up some fun times. I'm there w/ ya - I've got a dry run all the way until I get to see you guys. I need to learn to enjoy myself more, smile a little more and probably spare MTS all the gory details, and I will consider this thread my reminder for tonite - tomorrow.

Thx for reminding me

 

[Lestat]

hope you are doing better now bro

 

[bigmann245]

hope you are doing better now bro

yea actually i am. still hard though. but i think its looking better. i just have to stick to my guns is all.

 

[bigmann245]

These were the things I was gonna bring up. Sometimes when the regular business of the day just isn't making you feel satisfaction, you need to set up some fun times. I'm there w/ ya - I've got a dry run all the way until I get to see you guys. I need to learn to enjoy myself more, smile a little more and probably spare MTS all the gory details, and I will consider this thread my reminder for tonite - tomorrow.

Thx for reminding me

yea i definately hear ya. i am looking forward to meeting you. matt has told me a little about you so im sure we are going to get along just fine. mts is a very good bro. i spoke to him earlier. made me feel better.

a lot of good bros on this thread.

 

[H_T_]

P.S. : you happy, well adjusted motherfuckers need to chime right the fuck out. mind your happy fucking bizness and be gone. "I can't understand why you're unhappy", well, get the fuck out, then. go ask yo' fucking mommy and daddy why people are sad. don't tell me i need to be appreciative of the life i've got. do live like i do? fuck no. have you had a hard life? doubt it. walk a mile in someones shoes before you start passing judegment, you limpwristed queefs. must be nice having all that positive reinforcement with EVERY fuckng thing you do.

 

[HiDnGoD]

human contact is a nice thing. isolation or not having a voice is worse than any torture. maybe that person is as overwhelmed as you. space sounds like a good thing right now, but try talking to a friend or even a phone call to a family member.

My wife suffers from depression. She's not that bad, but still, it's difficult being with someone who is down all the time. The thing is she is so much better than me, she & she doesn't even see it. But she's getting help & it's tolerable.
Have you thought of getting help Bigmann? I know people don't like to admit this sort of thing, they feel weak. But depression is bigger than anyone.
Look after yourself. Remember, you are #1.

 

[H_T_]

wow, i'm cranky at 3 am. sorry.

 

[bigmann245]

My wife suffers from depression. She's not that bad, but still, it's difficult being with someone who is down all the time. The thing is she is so much better than me, she & she doesn't even see it. But she's getting help & it's tolerable.
Have you thought of getting help Bigmann? I know people don't like to admit this sort of thing, they feel weak. But depression is bigger than anyone.
Look after yourself. Remember, you are #1.

i have been getting help for the last 3 years ever since i severely broke my ankle and found out i was getting kicked out of the navy for it. medical discharge with retirement but still i wanted to do 20 years like my entire freegin family did and i cant. then after 7 surgeries im told it is a permanant painful condition that will not get better over time but in fact worse as time goes on. i was very highly active. i played all sorts of sports while in the navy. the last being semi-pro football. thats where i hurt my ankle. for reference see alien amp pharms sig. the guys ankle is the exact same thing that happened to me. anyways, my life has completely been changed forever. i can not do cardio and believe me i love to run. i was the fastest lineman on my team. i was out running recievers and db's. not the 40 but long distance around the entire field. but now i cant even walk the field without pain. but now i have crap building up that truthfully i should have taken care of years ago but i was too stuborn to listen and figured i can stick it out, it will get better and then live happily ever after. wrong..... i made a decision the other day that will effect my family. its a long story, as if this one isnt long enough... lol. anyways, i feel cheated, lied to, and let down by the most important person in my life. and on top of that i seam to be the guy friends take advantage of. i go out of my way for people. i give the shirt off my back. ive even offered to switch jobs with a friend cause he needed money and i got paid more but his response was i work too hard and thats not him. then he gets caught cheating on his wife and swears i had somethig to do with it and calls the navy and tells them im doing coke and fakeing my ankle injury. i almost got dishonorably discharged cause of that. good thing my docs backed me up and all the piss tests were clean. i never have and never will do coke. but it seams like as soon as i get comfortable with friends they turn on me and fuck me over.

you see i use to have a friend that i could call and talk to about all this. now i have to get it out on a freegin chat board like an idiot. this friend was a very good friend and i hope is just taking some space because there was a lot going on in their life as well. i know how listening to others problems when you have problems of your own is hard and can be overwhelming. but i just hope this person comes back when they are ready.

 

[HiDnGoD]

I have a friend who is depressed for no reason whatsoever and yet to her it is the end of the world. Its really confusing!!!!!

My wife & my friend both feel like this. My wife especially knows she has it good. A decent husband, a healthy kid, a good job, making great money, yet some days she doesn't want to get out of bed. That's the frustrating part for people with depression. They know there's no reason to feel the way they do, & they sometimes can't be bothered to try.

 

[Razorguns]

They know there's no reason to feel the way they do, & they sometimes can't be bothered to try.

Unfortunately a lot of people think prescrip drugs are the answer. And get addicted to shit like Prozac.

They are usually found later with a self-inflicted bullet to their head.