reading makes me have to poop

[HappyScrappy]

I suppose I've conditioned myself. it used to be if I had to make poopy, and I thought it might be awhile, then I'd try to find something to read.
now it is to the point that if I pick up something to read, then I have to take a dump nearly immediately.

man, that would make studying a bitch were I to go back to school.

I just got a new book from amazon and now I'm gonna have some quality time on the throne of despair.

 

[smallmovesal]

frorider isn't here

 

[the nature boy]

reading is fundamental for poop.

 

[68GT350]

Lol...You said "poopie." What a crackhead.

 

[Code]

Pooping makes me read.

 

[Nathan]

I'm so lonely.

 

[Stumpy (The Fucking dumbass Piece of Shit!)]

HappyScrappy,

How about getting a new username? Druzhok, Sultan, or possibly Zhuchka would be more appropriate than your current one.

 

[the nature boy]

speaking of poop, I used to date this broad, and she told me she had this ex of hers who had this strange fetish. He wanted to lie on his back with a piece of plexi-glass on top of him while she took a dump on the plexi-glass. It kind of freaked her out a bit. Don't get me wrong, she was a freak in the sack but I guess this was too much for her. So they settled on her pissing on him in the shower. You see, it's all about comprimise.

 

[Stumpy (The Fucking dumbass Piece of Shit!)]

speaking of poop, I used to date this broad, and she told me she had this ex of hers who had this strange fetish. He wanted to lie on his back with a piece of plexi-glass on top of him while she took a dump on the plexi-glass. It kind of freaked her out a bit. Don't get me wrong, she was a freak in the sack but I guess this was too much for her. So they settled on her pissing on him in the shower. You see, it's all about comprimise.

Ach, Scheisse!

 

[the nature boy]

Ach, Scheisse!

where have YOU been?

 

[HappyScrappy]

I don't know who this Stumpy character is, but I like their style. I demand everyone change their names now. preferrably something russian.

anyway, the update is, I went and painted the toilet, and read my neural net book, then I thought I was done and got back out here and now it seems that stuff is still shifting around and I probably need to go again.

I tell ya, this pooping stuff is just a big hassle.
well, I suppose the real hassle is the wiping. there is only so much wall space left for me to wipe on. I need a new apartment.

 

[Stumpy (The Fucking dumbass Piece of Shit!)]

where have YOU been?

(In Ronald Reagan's voice): "I don't know."

 

[Stumpy (The Fucking dumbass Piece of Shit!)]

I don't know who this Stumpy character is, but I like their style. I demand everyone change their names now. preferrably something russian.

Druzhok, Sultan, and Zhuchka were all Pavlov's dogs' names.

 

[spongebob]

pooping makes me bleed sometimes.

 

[the nature boy]

Re: Re: reading makes me have to poop

pooping makes me bleed sometimes.

are you sure you're doing it right?

 

[HappyScrappy]

Druzhok, Sultan, and Zhuchka were all Pavlov's dogs' names.

lol - I totally missed that allusion.
my bad.

 

[the nature boy]

lol - I totally missed that allusion.
my bad.

that's twice you've used the word "allusion" today.

 

[HappyScrappy]

that's twice you've used the word "allusion" today.

what are you alluding to?

glad someone is counting.

 

[spongebob]

Re: Re: Re: reading makes me have to poop

are you sure you're doing it right?

i think so, i sit down, strain and breath, then relax, then strain and breath again, i repeat this excruciating exercise till all excrement has been excreted, then i exhale.

seriously though, i think its caused by my impatience. i want to get in there and take care of business as quickly as possible. especially when im somewhere unfamiliar and i am scared of poopus-interruptus. this causes me to strain extra hard and this cause small blood vessels to break. the end.

 

[spongebob]

(In Ronald Reagan's voice): "I don't know."

welcome back!

 

[Stumpy (The Fucking dumbass Piece of Shit!)]

welcome back!

Thanks for the warm welcome.

 

[the nature boy]

Re: Re: Re: Re: reading makes me have to poop

i think so, i sit down, strain and breath, then relax, then strain and breath again, i repeat this excruciating exercise till all excrement has been excreted, then i exhale.

seriously though, i think its caused by my impatience. i want to get in there and take care of business as quickly as possible. especially when im somewhere unfamiliar and i am scared of poopus-interruptus. this causes me to strain extra hard and this cause small blood vessels to break. the end.

make sure you're hydrated, especially in the morning, and always be sure to rock back and forth.