question about cheating and friends?

[Megalomaniac]

So a friend and I were talking about SO cheating. I stated that if mine was I wouldn't want a friend to let me know. My reason is that my friends don't belong in my biz and if I she is and I don't know then I need the brutal slap in the face to some how wake me up in this world.

He felt that is what friends are for.

Thoughts?

 

[javaguru]

So a friend and I were talking about SO cheating. I stated that if mine was I wouldn't want a friend to let me know. My reason is that my friends don't belong in my biz and if I she is and I don't know then I need the brutal slap in the face to some how wake me up in this world.

He felt that is what friends are for.

Thoughts?

Very situation happened in college with one of our roomies. He was at home and she came over to hang out and ended up hooking up with some dude. I was at drill that weekend but was told what happened and the four of us had a meeting. None of us wanted to get directly involved but Jeff talked to her and told her to tell him or we would. Long story short, she lied and claimed to have told him but never did. Jeff mentioned it in passing a few months later and he was royally pissed we didn't tell him right away.

 

[Megalomaniac]

Very situation happened in college with one of our roomies. He was at home and she came over to hang out and ended up hooking up with some dude. I was at drill that weekend but was told what happened and the four of us had a meeting. None of us wanted to get directly involved but Jeff talked to her and told her to tell him or we would. Long story short, she lied and claimed to have told him but never did. Jeff mentioned it in passing a few months later and he was royally pissed we didn't tell him right away.

Interesting. Royally pissed? How long was he mad/did he just get mad at you guys and get over it? IMHO you guys did the perfect thing, at least how I would have wanted it to be. Do you think in hind site you should have done it the other way?

 

[javaguru]

Interesting. Royally pissed? How long was he mad/did he just get mad at you guys and get over it? IMHO you guys did the perfect thing, at least how I would have wanted it to be. Do you think in hind site you should have done it the other way?

He was pissed for a short period of time, we explained why we chose the course of action. Well, knowing she would lie about it.....I think we agreed to do the right thing but she was a shady wiminz.

 

[ceo]

I would think that if you approached a friend with said info, you'd better have a cut-n-dry, evidence filled case to present. I mean it better be more than, "I saw her having coffee with her ex." Shit better be absolutely undeniable or your friend may take her word over yours, then you're short one more friend.

 

[needtogetaas]

I would think that if you approached a friend with said info, you'd better have a cut-n-dry, evidence filled case to present. I mean it better be more than, "I saw her having coffee with her ex." Shit better be absolutely undeniable or your friend may take her word over yours, then you're short one more friend.

yup.

 

[needtogetarmy]

It depends if your friend is the one nailing your SO lol

BTW Friends are supposed to let you know.

 

[Megalomaniac]

It depends if your friend is the one nailing your SO lol

BTW Friends are supposed to let you know.

I like my friends to stay out of my biz, I don't want them telling me. I want to be handling my business well enough to know what is going on before they do. If they find out before me then either they are to close to my biz or I'm not handling it very well.
If she is willing to cheat on me with a friend she would be willing to do it with a stranger. If someone has to be getting it I'd rather have it be a friend then a stranger.

 

[Megalomaniac]

He was pissed for a short period of time, we explained why we chose the course of action. Well, knowing she would lie about it.....I think we agreed to do the right thing but she was a shady wiminz.

She was or they all are? LOL

I just hope that I have good enough friends to handle things the way it sounds you and your friends do.

 

[mountain muscle]

If your friends won't tell you, they are not friends. I expect my friends to tell me, that is why I chose friends carefully. Women come and go. You should always be able to trust your friends.

 

[javaguru]

She was or they all are? LOL

I just hope that I have good enough friends to handle things the way it sounds you and your friends do.

Do your friends ever listen when it comes to love? My best friend and I have conversations but we both know we won't listen to the advice.

 

[Megalomaniac]

Do your friends ever listen when it comes to love? My best friend and I have conversations but we both know we won't listen to the advice.

Exactly.

MM I'll ask the question again. Why the hell would your friends find out she is cheating before you? To me that would just let me know that I have absolutly no idea whatsoever about what is going on in my life. I mean if someone on the outside knows more about my sexual life then I do then I'm living life blind. If I am living life blind then I really don't want anyone to tell me be somehow it is working for me.

 

[javaguru]

Exactly.

MM I'll ask the question again. Why the hell would your friends find out she is cheating before you? To me that would just let me know that I have absolutly no idea whatsoever about what is going on in my life. I mean if someone on the outside knows more about my sexual life then I do then I'm living life blind. If I am living life blind then I really don't want anyone to tell me be somehow it is working for me.

You know the EF rule, she's already cheating on you. To be serious, some people have character and some don't.

 

[mountain muscle]

Exactly.

MM I'll ask the question again. Why the hell would your friends find out she is cheating before you? To me that would just let me know that I have absolutly no idea whatsoever about what is going on in my life. I mean if someone on the outside knows more about my sexual life then I do then I'm living life blind. If I am living life blind then I really don't want anyone to tell me be somehow it is working for me.

If your friends saw her out hooking up with some guy is what I was referring to.

You never let your girl out without you? Maybe during the work week they saw her out all over some guy at the lunch she told you she had to "work".

Don't be so silly to think it couldn't happen to you bro. There are a million situations she could cheat without you around but just might run into some of your friends.

 

[Megalomaniac]

If your friends saw her out hooking up with some guy is what I was referring to.

You never let your girl out without you? Maybe during the work week they saw her out all over some guy at the lunch she told you she had to "work".

Don't be so silly to think it couldn't happen to you bro. There are a million situations she could cheat without you around but just might run into some of your friends.

I'm saying that I attempt to keep my relationships healthy enough and open enough to where "cheating" doesn't happen. I you take the trill out of being a low life sneaking around on someone then why would they do it? When I was younger I had it happen to me, I learned from the situation.

 

[GoldenDelicious]

id want to be told. living in ignorance is nice and all, but since i got over being told the tooth fairy didnt exist, i think id live