Pop quiz hot shots...

[jnevin]

My girlfriend wants to give me head until I burst. We've never gotten that far before. (We end up having sex before the finale.) Problem is, she's insisting we do this tonight. I, dumbass, mixed my shake with milk instead of water this afternoon. I'm blowing more dirt than my grandfather ever did with a higher frequency that a hummingbird's wings flapping. And potent. Is there a quick solution for this? What do you do? What do you do?

 

[CFZB]

I have NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT ...but i want to help.

 

[jnevin]

Milk makes me fart. I don't want to let one go while she services me.

 

[BileStew]

The ramblings of a mind insane.

 

[jnevin]

The ramblings of a mind insane.

At best. Is that you Jebus?

 

[CFZB]

Milk makes me fart. I don't want to let one go while she services me.

AH HAA!!! I see..hrm....Gas Ex?

 

[jnevin]

AH HAA!!! I see..hrm....Gas Ex?

That shit works? How fast?

 

[CFZB]

That shit works? How fast?

Pretty fast I guess..(lol) I would hurry though cause that would suck..no pun intended.

unless you got MAD sphinkt control.

 

[browndog1]

"blowing dirt"

hhahahahahaha...

 

[hamstershaver]

go fire a missle that should help

 

[Beachbum1546]

Gas-X like PW said or Beano.

 

[CFZB]

did you break out the gas mask?

 

[EnderJE]

lol and this whole thread and of the image...

 

[Ganryu]

Dutch oven, baby. Dutch oven.

 

[slickdadd]

Go sit and the toilet and just thundermug it hard. You don't want to pass up a bj, and you definitely don't want to make her hair blow in the wind while servicing you.

 

[shawnerk]

give it to her -HAHAHA! This late at night- prolly already did- Lucky bastard!!!!

 

[H_T_]

jus pretend nothing happened if you rip ass, blame it on your dog, if you have one.....be like, "what smell?, i don't smell anything...." tell her the shitpipe broke in the street.........but, damn, lol, you're in a tite spot.

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

have her plug your butt with her finger. rnch swears by it

 

[jnevin]

All went very well. Gas-x plus a thunderous 30 second fart followed by a measly shit nugget exoecised the demons. Pants fit better actually. Nothing a half-bottle of Febreeze and a shower couldn't fix. So dsmn glad I didn't end up peeling the polish off of her nails.

 

[hamstershaver]

lol shit nugget

 

[jnevin]

lol shit nugget

That little fucker flew out with such force I got the cold water sphincter splash. I didn't warm up for a couple of minutes. Suddenly I have a bidet.