On Mothers day just remember 1 thing OK

[heavy_duty]

It is mothers day NOT WIFES DAY

I love this topic, it comes up every year

Do something for your mom not your wife, that is your kids' job.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Jesus H Christ... is your wife not the mother of YOUR children?

I could never understand men who had this idea.

So then, for Father's Day is it not your wife the one who helps YOUR kids make cards for you and show you other bits of appreciation when they are little?

The children follow the example of the parents... don't they?

And who best to teach a child that the greatest gift that he can give them is TO LOVE HER.... IF NOT THEIR FATHER?

 

[needtogetaas]

Jesus H Christ... is your wife not the mother of YOUR children?

I could never understand men who had this idea.

So then, for Father's Day is it not your wife the one who helps YOUR kids make cards for you and show you other bits of appreciation when they are little?

The children follow the example of the parents... don't they?

And who best to teach a child that the greatest gift that he can give them is TO LOVE HER.... IF NOT THEIR FATHER?

A men.

 

[GUARDIAN]

It is mothers day NOT WIFES DAY

I love this topic, it comes up every year

Do something for your mom not your wife, that is your kids' job.

starting a trend eh?

 

[Sub-Zero]

Jesus H Christ... is your wife not the mother of YOUR children?

I could never understand men who had this idea.

So then, for Father's Day is it not your wife the one who helps YOUR kids make cards for you and show you other bits of appreciation when they are little?

The children follow the example of the parents... don't they?

And who best to teach a child that the greatest gift that he can give them is TO LOVE HER.... IF NOT THEIR FATHER?

sorry, i normally think BM is way out of line, and too "mememe", and pro women and doesnt think of the mans enuff...

but i definately agree with her.

hubbys job to dote upon his babymama, just like its her to turn to make a big deal over the babydad on fathersday.

i give my grandma a card, on mothersday...and my mom a card/present/whatever.

mothersday was/is as big as a birthday in our home

 

[ceo]

Jesus H Christ... is your wife not the mother of YOUR children?

I could never understand men who had this idea.

So then, for Father's Day is it not your wife the one who helps YOUR kids make cards for you and show you other bits of appreciation when they are little?

The children follow the example of the parents... don't they?

And who best to teach a child that the greatest gift that he can give them is TO LOVE HER.... IF NOT THEIR FATHER?

Yep. totally correct you are.

 

[bigmann245]

crap, when is mothers day again?

 

[Bikini Mod]

crap, when is mothers day again?

LOL You've had plenty of "warning". It is the second Sunday of May in the United States.

 

[heavy_duty]

Jesus H Christ... is your wife not the mother of YOUR children?

I could never understand men who had this idea.

So then, for Father's Day is it not your wife the one who helps YOUR kids make cards for you and show you other bits of appreciation when they are little?

The children follow the example of the parents... don't they?

And who best to teach a child that the greatest gift that he can give them is TO LOVE HER.... IF NOT THEIR FATHER?

Do you swallow on fathers day?

 

[velvett]

BAH

Neither my father nor myself ever did anything good enough for my mother - GOD I hate these commercial redundant holidays.

I think I know what Heavy is talking about - I know many girls/women that expect from their husbands a piece of jewelry for every child they have on mother's day and recognition on each of their children's birthdays. And if they do not receive it there will be hell to pay, so I can see why a guy might think "JFC when does it end?".

 

[vixensghost]

I'm sad reading this thread.

 

[EnderJE]

Meh. Everyone gets a card. If it says "Mother's Day" on it, all the better.

 

[silverstar1025]

It is mothers day NOT WIFES DAY

I love this topic, it comes up every year

Do something for your mom not your wife, that is your kids' job.

Not when you have young kids. It is up to Dad to do something nice to help them. Just like we do the same on Father's Day. Nothing wrong with appreciate your spouse on these days. Besides we do lots of things for the husband that Mommy doesn't do for him anymore. My hubby buys better gifts for me now than his mom. I am the mother of his kids and I have taken over all the things his Mom did for him. So what is wrong with that? I cook his meals, wash his clothes,etc etc. Of course you are still supposed to remember your Mom and do something for her, but your wife should be just as important.

 

[silverstar1025]

Jesus H Christ... is your wife not the mother of YOUR children?

I could never understand men who had this idea.

So then, for Father's Day is it not your wife the one who helps YOUR kids make cards for you and show you other bits of appreciation when they are little?

The children follow the example of the parents... don't they?

And who best to teach a child that the greatest gift that he can give them is TO LOVE HER.... IF NOT THEIR FATHER?

Exactly!

 

[Arabian]

Good Post HD

 

[GUARDIAN]

my 3 dogs have saved up a couple months worth of treats that they r using to buy gifts for their mommy.

 

[Sub-Zero]

BAH

Neither my father nor myself ever did anything good enough for my mother - GOD I hate these commercial redundant holidays.

I think I know what Heavy is talking about - I know many girls/women that expect from their husbands a piece of jewelry for every child they have on mother's day and recognition on each of their children's birthdays. And if they do not receive it there will be hell to pay, so I can see why a guy might think "JFC when does it end?".

anyone who expects presents or special treatment pisses me off in general, and ruins the "specialness" and motivation to give a present in the first place

 

[cindylou]

anyone who expects presents or special treatment pisses me off in general, and ruins the "specialness" and motivation to give a present in the first place

I totally agree - though it seems most of the people who feel like this expect special treatment on their days/occassions but bitch when its time to show someone else that they are special too

 

[cindylou]

breakfast and some picked flowers and household chores done on that day would satisfy any mother I'll bet

i dont have kids - i have to do all the buying on mothers day

my gifts are the time i spend which each mother and maybe a cheap trendy accessory that they woudnt buy themselves.

maybe a flower pot for their house that i put together or whatever

 

[Raptorex]

mothers are under-valued x 100

 

[Bikini Mod]

breakfast and some picked flowers and household chores done on that day would satisfy any mother I'll bet

i dont have kids - i have to do all the buying on mothers day

my gifts are the time i spend which each mother and maybe a cheap trendy accessory that they woudnt buy themselves.

maybe a flower pot for their house that i put together or whatever

It should NEVER be about money CindyLou and it sounds you got *get it* 100%. As our children grow and leave us (as they should if you raise them properly) what better gift to get than THE GIFT OF TIME WITH THEM?!?!

And Vel - I understand what you are saying but that type of behavior is a direct reflection on who that man chose as a WIFE. That still doesn't mean that a man shouldn't help his young children make cards or cook THE MOST DISGUSTING breakfast/whathaveyou.

I would be thrilled with a hug from each of my children, but that won't be the case for the third year in a row. You see all the money in the world won't bring a single hug or a kiss from them...

The mother should behave no differently towards her husband. I hope to all that is right and wonderful in this life that THIS YEAR the man that I married who was not the man who fathered my children will get *the ultimate gift* by seeing the woman he loves being able to mother her children. There are many reasons why I love my husband but the fact that he has willingly taken on this fight and won't give up, no matter how tough fighting for MY KIDS... well that is something that money could never buy and yet another reason why I would never forsake him.

Yet another reason why a man should look for so much more than *mere* physical beauty when choosing a life partner.

 

[bigmann245]

It should NEVER be about money CindyLou and it sounds you got *get it* 100%. As our children grow and leave us (as they should if you raise them properly) what better gift to get than THE GIFT OF TIME WITH THEM?!?!

And Vel - I understand what you are saying but that type of behavior is a direct reflection on who that man chose as a WIFE. That still doesn't mean that a man shouldn't help his young children make cards or cook THE MOST DISGUSTING breakfast/whathaveyou.

I would be thrilled with a hug from each of my children, but that won't be the case for the third year in a row. You see all the money in the world won't bring a single hug or a kiss from them...

The mother should behave no differently towards her husband. I hope to all that is right and wonderful in this life that THIS YEAR the man that I married who was not the man who fathered my children will get *the ultimate gift* by seeing the woman he loves being able to mother her children. There are many reasons why I love my husband but the fact that he has willingly taken on this fight and won't give up, no matter how tough fighting for MY KIDS... well that is something that money could never buy and yet another reason why I would never forsake him.

Yet another reason why a man should look for so much more than *mere* physical beauty when choosing a life partner.

so the fact that your smokin hot has no play in the matter? jk jk, he is more of a man than most of the males on this board can ever dream to be.

 

[nefertiti]

Ugh, my dad and I always did something nice for my mom on mother's day...always. Just as my mom and I did nice things for father's day. We usually gave gifts that would please the person being honored, but would be enjoyed by the whole family, and we'd all go out to eat together. I guess for us, then, it was more "family day." Things like a grill and a hammock for my dad, rose bushes with a trellis my dad and I built for my mom. There are ways to make these "commercial redundant" holidays special and personal.

But then, no one in my family ever made a big deal about expecting material things, so it was more fun to be the giver when you knew it wasn't being taken for granted.

 

[blueta2]

It is mothers day NOT WIFES DAY

I love this topic, it comes up every year

Do something for your mom not your wife, that is your kids' job.

I've always had the same theory.

I concur

Unless the kids are too young

 

[cindylou]

For my husband's mom we all go up north to the cabin to fish, barbeque and drink beer and ride on 4wheelers its an all day thing on Sat.

for my mom I invite her to my house for dinner and conversation on Sunday after church

mohter's day weekend

 

[BBR100]

It should NEVER be about money CindyLou and it sounds you got *get it* 100%. As our children grow and leave us (as they should if you raise them properly) what better gift to get than THE GIFT OF TIME WITH THEM?!?!

And Vel - I understand what you are saying but that type of behavior is a direct reflection on who that man chose as a WIFE. That still doesn't mean that a man shouldn't help his young children make cards or cook THE MOST DISGUSTING breakfast/whathaveyou.

I would be thrilled with a hug from each of my children, but that won't be the case for the third year in a row. You see all the money in the world won't bring a single hug or a kiss from them...

The mother should behave no differently towards her husband. I hope to all that is right and wonderful in this life that THIS YEAR the man that I married who was not the man who fathered my children will get *the ultimate gift* by seeing the woman he loves being able to mother her children. There are many reasons why I love my husband but the fact that he has willingly taken on this fight and won't give up, no matter how tough fighting for MY KIDS... well that is something that money could never buy and yet another reason why I would never forsake him.

Yet another reason why a man should look for so much more than *mere* physical beauty when choosing a life partner.

I don't know what happened but that's pretty rotten for both you and for them.
It's been 5 years since my ex-wife and I split but I always make sure they get or do something for their mom on mother's day.

 

[fistfullofsteel]

just another way for companies to suck every last cent out of a guy. most married guys are happy if they get sex from their wife on father's day, because their wives stop putting out. how fucking sad and pathetic is that?

 

[vixensghost]

I pride myself in knowing that my mom and dad had Mother's/Father's Day EVERY day when I had them in my life. A daily call, reminders of how much I(we) loved them, and how lucky I was to be their child. The simple I love You phrase can outshine anything!

I feel VERY blessed knowing my child learned from example; and gives these gifts to her daddy and I on a daily basis.

 

[fistfullofsteel]

I pride myself in knowing that my mom and dad had Mother's/Father's Day EVERY day when I had them in my life. A daily call, reminders of how much I(we) loved them, and how lucky I was to be their child. The simple I love You phrase can outshine anything!

I feel VERY blessed knowing my child learned from example; and gives these gifts to her daddy and I on a daily basis.

Your dad was a great man. He was a NY Giants fan. He is a fellow comrade.

 

[vixensghost]

So true Fist.

 

[Bikini Mod]

I pride myself in knowing that my mom and dad had Mother's/Father's Day EVERY day when I had them in my life. A daily call, reminders of how much I(we) loved them, and how lucky I was to be their child. The simple I love You phrase can outshine anything!

I feel VERY blessed knowing my child learned from example; and gives these gifts to her daddy and I on a daily basis.

You know ma'am, I have said this before and I will keep on saying it: The world would be a much better place if there were more people/parents like you and your husband, your parents (and I suspect) your husband's parents.

 

[heavy_duty]

Not when you have young kids. It is up to Dad to do something nice to help them. Just like we do the same on Father's Day. Nothing wrong with appreciate your spouse on these days. Besides we do lots of things for the husband that Mommy doesn't do for him anymore. My hubby buys better gifts for me now than his mom. I am the mother of his kids and I have taken over all the things his Mom did for him. So what is wrong with that? I cook his meals, wash his clothes,etc etc. Of course you are still supposed to remember your Mom and do something for her, but your wife should be just as important.

Holy shit are you joking? "I have taken over all the things his Mom did for him"

are you his moma or his wife or is it the same thing to you?

 

[heavy_duty]

I don't know what happened but that's pretty rotten for both you and for them.
It's been 5 years since my ex-wife and I split but I always make sure they get or do something for their mom on mother's day.

Marc
Why do you have to make sure they do something for their mom? If you did not "make sure" would they then forget all about mom?
Maybe it was just the way you wrote it.

My kids are 4 & 6 and are making all kinds of stuff at school already for mothers day. No need for me to have to remind them about it, they are already excited and prepared.

 

[heavy_duty]

He is more of a man than most of the males on this board can ever dream to be.

Drama at its best!

 

[Bikini Mod]

Marc
Why do you have to make sure they do something for their mom? If you did not "make sure" would they then forget all about mom?
Maybe it was just the way you wrote it.

My kids are 4 & 6 and are making all kinds of stuff at school already for mothers day. No need for me to have to remind them about it, they are already excited and prepared.

What if making little cards/etc was NOT part of the curriculum?

Every year the kindergarten and 1st grade teachers at my kids old elementary school would end up buying MOST of the kids' the cheapie little plants for the kids so that they could have a crappy flower to bring home to their mothers. Most of the kids' moms are the ones to prepare all the stuff for their kids' school stuff. How messed up is it that if THE MOM doesn't give the kid the couple bucks for them to buy their mommy a cheapie little stinkie plant then 95% of the dads - FORGET. So who feels badly? THAT LITTLE KID.

So you were saying?

Children learn from their parents' example, as most of the board members are demonstrating by their posts.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Drama at its best!

You think that "the drama" that my husband has willingly taken on is amusing?

Well let me be the first to say that I am pleased that my childrens' suffering is a source of amusement and entertainment for you.

 

[biteme]

I think all these stupid days should be done away with... I'm a father and I don't like father's day either.... Only good thing is it's an excuse for the family to get together... We should do it without having to have those dumb designated days.

 

[nefertiti]

Some of you are honestly a bunch of curmudgeons. There's nothing wrong with having a special day to honor each of your parents, or the mother/father of your children. Sure, I told my parents I loved the all the time, did things for them all the time. But there really isn't harm in a "designated" day to have it be about that person. It can be fun for everyone involved unless you're going into it with a lemon in your mouth.

Jesus.

 

[cindylou]

there are tons of sons who wouldnt see their mother at all if it were not for the designated holidays. I dont know about you guys but I'm busy - I rarely see my grandmother on my dad's side except holidays like these

 

[Cutiebaby]

What if making little cards/etc was NOT part of the curriculum?

Every year the kindergarten and 1st grade teachers at my kids old elementary school would end up buying MOST of the kids' the cheapie little plants for the kids so that they could have a crappy flower to bring home to their mothers. Most of the kids' moms are the ones to prepare all the stuff for their kids' school stuff. How messed up is it that if THE MOM doesn't give the kid the couple bucks for them to buy their mommy a cheapie little stinkie plant then 95% of the dads - FORGET. So who feels badly? THAT LITTLE KID.

So you were saying?

Children learn from their parents' example, as most of the board members are demonstrating by their posts.

exactly, my daughters school does not support any holidays at all due to many different cultures and backgrounds. Therefore the only way she will know it is moms day is if someone at home tells her about it.

 

[heavy_duty]

What if making little cards/etc was NOT part of the curriculum?

Every year the kindergarten and 1st grade teachers at my kids old elementary school would end up buying MOST of the kids' the cheapie little plants for the kids so that they could have a crappy flower to bring home to their mothers. Most of the kids' moms are the ones to prepare all the stuff for their kids' school stuff. How messed up is it that if THE MOM doesn't give the kid the couple bucks for them to buy their mommy a cheapie little stinkie plant then 95% of the dads - FORGET. So who feels badly? THAT LITTLE KID.

So you were saying?

Children learn from their parents' example, as most of the board members are demonstrating by their posts.

At your kids school? LOL this is 2008 not 1978
my kids make awesome shit every day. You should have picked a better school.

 

[billfred]

It is mothers day NOT WIFES DAY

I love this topic, it comes up every year

Do something for your mom not your wife, that is your kids' job.

I strictly adhear to this every year. Drives my wife crazy but after 22 yrs, she accepts it.

 

[heavy_duty]

You think that "the drama" that my husband has willingly taken on is amusing?

Well let me be the first to say that I am pleased that my childrens' suffering is a source of amusement and entertainment for you.

Lady
read the part I quoted. I think what the dude said was ultra dramatic.

 

[heavy_duty]

Some of you are honestly a bunch of curmudgeons. There's nothing wrong with having a special day to honor each of your parents, or the mother/father of your children. Sure, I told my parents I loved the all the time, did things for them all the time. But there really isn't harm in a "designated" day to have it be about that person. It can be fun for everyone involved unless you're going into it with a lemon in your mouth.

Jesus.

Nef I agree with you. It is a day where kids do stuff for mom though. Not husband for wife. It is not wife day

 

[heavy_duty]

exactly, my daughters school does not support any holidays at all due to many different cultures and backgrounds. Therefore the only way she will know it is moms day is if someone at home tells her about it.

Get her out of that school, this kind of training is not doing her any good.
Put her in a school that supports exactly what she is taught at home or in her church or her own culture.

Learning one way at home then another in school is too much of a conflict.

 

[Cutiebaby]

Get her out of that school, this kind of training is not doing her any good.
Put her in a school that supports exactly what she is taught at home or in her church or her own culture.

Learning one way at home then another in school is too much of a conflict.

yeah no shit..Just because other cultures feel the way that they do there is no reason why my kid should have to do without..I went out and bought all valentine day shit then the day before I get a notice that they do not honor holidays due to some children that do not celebrate them..Guess it goes for all holidays and special days..Instead they have fun days where they wear silly hats, pj's, and dress silly.

I personally am not happy about it but whatever 1 more month and she is done there.

 

[nefertiti]

Nef I agree with you. It is a day where kids do stuff for mom though. Not husband for wife. It is not wife day

I always did things in conjunction with my other parents. As i said, my dad and I did something for my mom, my mom and I went shopping for dad. It was a family affair, and I see nothing incongruent about that. My mother and father saw both days as days to honor "mothers" and "fathers" in our immediate family, not specifically the mother and father who bore us. For example, my parents always send a little something to my sister and my brother's wife on mother's day as well (as they are both mothers). I guess I just grew up in a family that gives freely and without bitterness.

 

[heavy_duty]

I always did things in conjunction with my other parents. As i said, my dad and I did something for my mom, my mom and I went shopping for dad. It was a family affair, and I see nothing incongruent about that. My mother and father saw both days as days to honor "mothers" and "fathers" in our immediate family, not specifically the mother and father who bore us. For example, my parents always send a little something to my sister and my brother's wife on mother's day as well (as they are both mothers). I guess I just grew up in a family that gives freely and without bitterness.

Don't try to sweeten my bitterness

 

[velvett]

And Vel - I understand what you are saying but that type of behavior is a direct reflection on who that man chose as a WIFE. That still doesn't mean that a man shouldn't help his young children make cards or cook THE MOST DISGUSTING breakfast/whathaveyou.

I never said he shouldn't make a card or meal.

 

[velvett]

There are ways to make these "commercial redundant" holidays special and personal.

It's not possible, a special moment brought forth through a sincere emotion can not be done when it s expected of someone to do for another.

 

[velvett]

anyone who expects presents or special treatment pisses me off in general, and ruins the "specialness" and motivation to give a present in the first place

Exactly!

 

[the_oak]

I always use days like this to show M'Lady how much she is valued in my household.
I help the kids arrange special treats and send a large bouquet of flowers to her work on friday so her catty co-workers realize her value as well.
She comes home beaming on friday....and stays that way through the weekend.

 

[roadwarrior]

mothers are under-valued x 100

+1 many times over... for my mom, mom in law, grandma, great grandma, and most of all my wife who makes everything in our lives work right.

 

[Bikini Mod]

At your kids school? LOL this is 2008 not 1978
my kids make awesome shit every day. You should have picked a better school.

Ummmm you are missing the point as always. The school system that my children attended at the time (my youngest is only 11) were on of THE BEST in the State of NJ. How is it the responsibility of THE TEACHER to teach YOUR CHILD to honor their mother? I thought that stuff started at home. Lucky for your kids that it IS part of the curriculum (according to you).... eh?

 

[Bikini Mod]

Lady
read the part I quoted. I think what the dude said was ultra dramatic.

Sir my reading comprehension skills are just fine thankyouverymuch. Piss poor job on the back-peddle though because I called you out on it publicly. There are very few men ANYWHERE that could hold a candle to my husband. THAT = FACT. Deal.

Still, I am glad that my children's suffering has brought you entertainment, that coupled with your sentiments on this thread show your character.

BRAVO!!!

 

[heavy_duty]

Sir my reading comprehension skills are just fine thankyouverymuch. Piss poor job on the back-peddle though because I called you out on it publicly. There are very few men ANYWHERE that could hold a candle to my husband. THAT = FACT. Deal.

Still, I am glad that my children's suffering has brought you entertainment, that coupled with your sentiments on this thread show your character.

BRAVO!!!

LOL The day I back-peddle on you there will be six moons in the sky.

try again and read s-l-o-w

The guy said "He is more of a man than most of the males on this board can ever dream to be"

IMO this is an ultra dramatic statement -

How many males on the forum have met your husband face to face? How many even know the guy?

I mean "ever dream to be"

give me a break

 

[heavy_duty]

Ummmm you are missing the point as always. The school system that my children attended at the time (my youngest is only 11) were on of THE BEST in the State of NJ. How is it the responsibility of THE TEACHER to teach YOUR CHILD to honor their mother? I thought that stuff started at home. Lucky for your kids that it IS part of the curriculum (according to you).... eh?

missed the point again ol-lady

I said my kids make awesome shit as in CRAFTS AND ART duh that IS part of the Curriculum

 

[heavy_duty]

Ummmm you are missing the point as always. The school system that my children attended at the time (my youngest is only 11) were on of THE BEST in the State of NJ. How is it the responsibility of THE TEACHER to teach YOUR CHILD to honor their mother? I thought that stuff started at home. Lucky for your kids that it IS part of the curriculum (according to you).... eh?

Oh man I really don't think you want to start a "lucky for your kids" dissing contest so I'm just gonna pretend you didnt go there EH!

 

[Bikini Mod]

LOL The day I back-peddle on you there will be six moons in the sky.

try again and read s-l-o-w

The guy said "He is more of a man than most of the males on this board can ever dream to be"

IMO this is an ultra dramatic statement -

How many males on the forum have met your husband face to face? How many even know the guy?

I mean "ever dream to be"

give me a break

We will give you all the breaks you need, because obviously you need many.

Check this out: just as we take what MOST of the other board members post up at face value, so do MOST of the other members take our posts at face value. Says alot about character, don't you agree?

And as for who has met my husband face to face? What does that have to do with another man recognizing the magnitude of my husband's manhood for fighting tooth and nail for children that he didn't make? Would you do such a thing? Wait a minute. Nevermind, the answer is clear when you are resentfull of the notion that a man help his young child make a card for his mommy to honor her on mother's day. Based on this, I withdraw the question.

Your pettiness shines through with each of your posts progressively. All you need to do is go back and read how many MEN on this thread have echoed my sentiments.

Darlin', I don't know you AT ALL but based on your posts on this thread alone... I DONT WANT TO.

Have a wonderful day.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Oh man I really don't think you want to start a "lucky for your kids" dissing contest so I'm just gonna pretend you didnt go there EH!

I have no clue what you are talking about. I merely made mention to YOUR COMMENT about how "I should have chosen another school because making cards for their mother for mother's day was apparently not part of the curriculum."

Again... pisspoor back-peddle.

Good day. I have said all that I have wanted to say.

Peace.

You are the type of person that you are and so shall you remain.

 

[heavy_duty]

I have said all that I have wanted to say.

We only wish

 

[nefertiti]

It's not possible, a special moment brought forth through a sincere emotion can not be done when it s expected of someone to do for another.

Sorry, Vel, I just don't agree. From experience. My family taught the value of loving to give over loving to receive. It was never a matter of giving what was expected, even on a set day. You can speak for yourself, but you definitely can't speak for all.

No one in my family ever had an attitude of "I expect etc etc etc" on x day. Just because something isn't 100% a surprise doesn't mean it's expected, or worse, taken for granted.

In other settings, I've had valentines days where I've done elaborate things for the guy I was with. It was always genuine, fun, and sincere - I like these kinds of days. Sure, I do nice things on other days...but i love planning for these days and deciding how I am going to make it special and personal. What predetermined days mean...is entirely up to the people involved.

Like I said....these days can be FUN. All can enjoy...unless you walk into them already deciding they are bullshit. It doesn't have to have a thing to do with what someone expects....but for someone who loves being a giver, it can be yet another in *many* excuses to go all out for someone you love. Christmas is fun for me, not because of what I might get, but because of the joy I get from getting great, and personal gifts for others.

Bottom line, it is what you make of it...period. No one can speak for all.

 

[BBR100]

Marc
Why do you have to make sure they do something for their mom? If you did not "make sure" would they then forget all about mom?
Maybe it was just the way you wrote it.

My kids are 4 & 6 and are making all kinds of stuff at school already for mothers day. No need for me to have to remind them about it, they are already excited and prepared.

That's great that they're excited and prepared in school. I feel it's important that they know I think it's important to show an appreciation for their mom on this day. I remember a Mother's Day that I didn't do anything for my mom and saw the hurt in her face. I'll never forget it and never let it happen again. Moms and Dads efforts can be taken for granted, especially, by egocentric children.

 

[cindylou]

Sorry, Vel, I just don't agree. From experience. My family taught the value of loving to give over loving to receive. It was never a matter of giving what was expected, even on a set day. You can speak for yourself, but you definitely can't speak for all.

No one in my family ever had an attitude of "I expect etc etc etc" on x day. Just because something isn't 100% a surprise doesn't mean it's expected, or worse, taken for granted.

In other settings, I've had valentines days where I've done elaborate things for the guy I was with. It was always genuine, fun, and sincere - I like these kinds of days. Sure, I do nice things on other days...but i love planning for these days and deciding how I am going to make it special and personal. What predetermined days mean...is entirely up to the people involved.

Like I said....these days can be FUN. All can enjoy...unless you walk into them already deciding they are bullshit. It doesn't have to have a thing to do with what someone expects....but for someone who loves being a giver, it can be yet another in *many* excuses to go all out for someone you love. Christmas is fun for me, not because of what I might get, but because of the joy I get from getting great, and personal gifts for others.

Bottom line, it is what you make of it...period. No one can speak for all.

great post nef

i agree with both

it all depends on the person - the family.

my mother has never expected a damn thing from me

you know what I think im going to give my mom for mother's day this year?

my husband. lol. for a day.

my dad is an AWFUL handyman - he is completely WORTHLESS. lol. He could come over and sharpen the lawnmower blade and do some handy work around the house and stuff. he would do it anywy - but putting his picture in a card with a big ol cheesy grin and be at her beck and call all day long for whatever day she chooses - lol - she's going to LOVE IT. haha i cant wait.

 

[Bikini Mod]

That's great that they're excited and prepared in school. I feel it's important that they know I think it's important to show an appreciation for their mom on this day. I remember a Mother's Day that I didn't do anything for my mom and saw the hurt in her face. I'll never forget it and never let it happen again. Moms and Dads efforts can be taken for granted, especially, by egocentric children.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Sorry, Vel, I just don't agree. From experience. My family taught the value of loving to give over loving to receive. It was never a matter of giving what was expected, even on a set day. You can speak for yourself, but you definitely can't speak for all.

No one in my family ever had an attitude of "I expect etc etc etc" on x day. Just because something isn't 100% a surprise doesn't mean it's expected, or worse, taken for granted.

In other settings, I've had valentines days where I've done elaborate things for the guy I was with. It was always genuine, fun, and sincere - I like these kinds of days. Sure, I do nice things on other days...but i love planning for these days and deciding how I am going to make it special and personal. What predetermined days mean...is entirely up to the people involved.

Like I said....these days can be FUN. All can enjoy...unless you walk into them already deciding they are bullshit. It doesn't have to have a thing to do with what someone expects....but for someone who loves being a giver, it can be yet another in *many* excuses to go all out for someone you love. Christmas is fun for me, not because of what I might get, but because of the joy I get from getting great, and personal gifts for others.

Bottom line, it is what you make of it...period. No one can speak for all.

 

[Bikini Mod]

great post nef

i agree with both

it all depends on the person - the family.

my mother has never expected a damn thing from me

you know what I think im going to give my mom for mother's day this year?

my husband. lol. for a day.

my dad is an AWFUL handyman - he is completely WORTHLESS. lol. He could come over and sharpen the lawnmower blade and do some handy work around the house and stuff. he would do it anywy - but putting his picture in a card with a big ol cheesy grin and be at her beck and call all day long for whatever day she chooses - lol - she's going to LOVE IT. haha i cant wait.

 

[velvett]

Sorry, Vel, I just don't agree. From experience. My family taught the value of loving to give over loving to receive. It was never a matter of giving what was expected, even on a set day. You can speak for yourself, but you definitely can't speak for all.

No one in my family ever had an attitude of "I expect etc etc etc" on x day. Just because something isn't 100% a surprise doesn't mean it's expected, or worse, taken for granted.

In other settings, I've had valentines days where I've done elaborate things for the guy I was with. It was always genuine, fun, and sincere - I like these kinds of days. Sure, I do nice things on other days...but i love planning for these days and deciding how I am going to make it special and personal. What predetermined days mean...is entirely up to the people involved.

Like I said....these days can be FUN. All can enjoy...unless you walk into them already deciding they are bullshit. It doesn't have to have a thing to do with what someone expects....but for someone who loves being a giver, it can be yet another in *many* excuses to go all out for someone you love. Christmas is fun for me, not because of what I might get, but because of the joy I get from getting great, and personal gifts for others.

Bottom line, it is what you make of it...period. No one can speak for all.

I think the major factor here is what type of family you came from and I can tell you mine, was nothing like yours. Holidays were a source of happiness for you growing up and holidays for me were simply a reminder of the insincerity and selfishness of humans.

My mother would buy me birthday and Christmas gifts growing up that she would like for herself and even after asking me as a child what I wanted she would buy something else then punish me that I wasn't grateful enough.

I only send my mother flowers to be cordial for mothers day and her birthday and I never skimp on anything but she would call me to complain about the poor quality of flowers that florist sent out, or that they were not cut right or that the delivery man left them outside in the bad weather. Now that I have a fantastic florist I can send flowers and not have to hear from her at all.

When it comes to my family every day should be daughter's day for the hell she put me though the first 17 years of my life. Not everyone has a story book home life and some people are simply not worthy of such affection - holiday or no holiday.

Fortunately my father and I see holidays exactly the same - we have some kind of unspoken understanding.

For those close to me they know I don't do holidays, a card at times to remind them that they are loved and appreciated but what they also know is that when they are feeling down or life has gotten the better them I am the person that will be there for them to count on. So if it's a cake, flowers, a meal at their favorite dive, electronics or just an ear to listen to them, I will figure out what they have been wanting or need to cheer them up then that is what they will have.

The best gift ever is to give someone something you know they have wanted but wouldn't buy for themselves and give it to them when they least expect it.

That is love, respect and loyalty - not some Hallmark holiday label on a calender.

You love someone make sure they know as often as possible because one day you may no longer have the opportunity.

 

[Bikini Mod]

You love someone make sure they know as often as possible because one day you may no longer have the opportunity.

I understand Velvett... neither one of us had a mother that was stellar from the sound of it. Even now my mother has been dying, suffering horribly for months and all I can say is that I had a conversation with her couple months back and even though she never apologized to me for all of the terrible things that she has done RECENTLY (not even gonna talk about growing up) at the very least she recognized the magnitude of the pain that I have gone through. So that was enough for me. I suppose it will have to be, won't it? On the one hand I must remain cold, but on the other hand that woman is MY MOTHER and it kills me that she is the way she is, but I also recognize that there isn't a damned thing that I can do to change her, nor do I feel the need to bear guilt for it.

Strange we are brought into this world defenseless and looking to another (our mother) for our every need, for guidance and support. Some of us got *some good* (obviously as we wouldn't have turned out to be good people if we didn't get SOME of that) but many of us got way too little of it through no fault of our own. I mean, how could it be as not one of us ASKED to be born.

That is why I believe that ANY WOMAN who took the time to go out of her way and MOTHER US (Yea, even adults NEED THAT) should be remembered in some small way. Does it HAVE to be on "the day" that Hallmarked picked? Of course not. I am with you that EVERY DAY should be a holiday and NO, I am not talking about presents. I am talking about a sincere hug and the question, "How are YOU feeling today?".... and then sit there and REALLY listen to the reply.

There is a special sort of love when a woman gives as she *mothers* and it has nothing to do with whether or not her uterus has been stretched.... Maybe I am too emotional because of my life circumstances, but I don't think that is necessarily a bad thing.

As I stated on another thread I can think of THREE women right now who have mothered me because my own is incapable.

I am not into commercialization either. I HATE IT... but I don't think there is any harm in having *seasonal* celebrations. Rituals are part of what make us human and how could a ritual that cherishes the love of mothers be a bad thing?

 

[Bikini Mod]

PS - Velvett because it couldn't fit in the Knote I still have the book AND the black box. In that box I have one of my most prized possessions. It is a piece of penny candy that my Mari bought me on the last field trip that I accompanied her on. Of course, I didn't know at the time it would be that way... She only had "X" amount of money to buy gifts in the gift shop and, of course, because she was with me that meant her father didn't give her ANY money, so you know that we are talking SMALL amount. She only had enough to buy a piece of candy for her father and each of her sisters and herself. You have no idea how surprized I was when on the bus she put a piece of candy in my hand and said, "No mami, I didn't buy this one for me. I bought it FOR YOU - silly mami."

How ridiculous is it that I STILL have that piece of 25 cent candy TWO YEARS LATER and I keep it in THAT box....?

 

[velvett]

PS - Velvett because it couldn't fit in the Knote I still have the book AND the black box. In that box I have one of my most prized possessions. It is a piece of penny candy that my Mari bought me on the last field trip that I accompanied her on. Of course, I didn't know at the time it would be that way... She only had "X" amount of money to buy gifts in the gift shop and, of course, because she was with me that meant her father didn't give her ANY money, so you know that we are talking SMALL amount. She only had enough to buy a piece of candy for her father and each of her sisters and herself. You have no idea how surprized I was when on the bus she put a piece of candy in my hand and said, "No mami, I didn't buy this one for me. I bought it FOR YOU - silly mami."

How ridiculous is it that I STILL have that piece of 25 cent candy TWO YEARS LATER and I keep it in THAT box....?

See, that's what I'm talking about.
That's love.

 

[Bikini Mod]

See, that's what I'm talking about.
That's love.

Yes, I am quite blessed. She was only 9 years old.

I have this ridiculous idea in my head that when I do finally get my girls back I will show her the black box (that I also have old baby pics of and some random baby teeth LOL) and see if she remembers the candy.

I am willing to wager that she will... and even if she doesn't I hope that she will be touched when I tell her why I kept it all this time, because it was a selfless gift from HER.

I still have all the little rinkydink dollar store gifts and notes and cards that have survived all of the moving I have done. Lots of the stuff is broken but NO ONE is allowed to touch...

You are SO RIGHT when you said that we should cherish those that we love because one day you are saying good-bye to them as they head off to school and the next day you aren't their mother anymore...

Fathers be kind to your children and teach them how to love and respect their one and only mother as children are selfish by nature. Don't assume or leave such an important task up to a stranger.

And mothers be patient with and supportive of your children's fathers. They are human and tire too. Your children should always look upon them like they are ten feet tall... even though they are as fragile and flawed as YOU are.

And for those of us who had *less than stellar* parents, let's try to be aware of other men and women who are attempting to parent us and try not to focus on what you didn't get from your parents, but rather appreciate what the universe is giving you NOW....

AND PAY THAT FORWARD.

 

[puddlemonkey]

I have said all that I have wanted to say.

I understand Velvett... neither one of us had a mother that was stellar from the sound of it. Even now my mother has been dying, suffering horribly for months and all I can say is that I had a conversation with her couple months back and even though she never apologized to me for all of the terrible things that she has done RECENTLY (not even gonna talk about growing up) at the very least she recognized the magnitude of the pain that I have gone through. So that was enough for me. I suppose it will have to be, won't it? On the one hand I must remain cold, but on the other hand that woman is MY MOTHER and it kills me that she is the way she is, but I also recognize that there isn't a damned thing that I can do to change her, nor do I feel the need to bear guilt for it.

Strange we are brought into this world defenseless and looking to another (our mother) for our every need, for guidance and support. Some of us got *some good* (obviously as we wouldn't have turned out to be good people if we didn't get SOME of that) but many of us got way too little of it through no fault of our own. I mean, how could it be as not one of us ASKED to be born.

That is why I believe that ANY WOMAN who took the time to go out of her way and MOTHER US (Yea, even adults NEED THAT) should be remembered in some small way. Does it HAVE to be on "the day" that Hallmarked picked? Of course not. I am with you that EVERY DAY should be a holiday and NO, I am not talking about presents. I am talking about a sincere hug and the question, "How are YOU feeling today?".... and then sit there and REALLY listen to the reply.

There is a special sort of love when a woman gives as she *mothers* and it has nothing to do with whether or not her uterus has been stretched.... Maybe I am too emotional because of my life circumstances, but I don't think that is necessarily a bad thing.

As I stated on another thread I can think of THREE women right now who have mothered me because my own is incapable.

I am not into commercialization either. I HATE IT... but I don't think there is any harm in having *seasonal* celebrations. Rituals are part of what make us human and how could a ritual that cherishes the love of mothers be a bad thing?

PS - Velvett because it couldn't fit in the Knote I still have the book AND the black box. In that box I have one of my most prized possessions. It is a piece of penny candy that my Mari bought me on the last field trip that I accompanied her on. Of course, I didn't know at the time it would be that way... She only had "X" amount of money to buy gifts in the gift shop and, of course, because she was with me that meant her father didn't give her ANY money, so you know that we are talking SMALL amount. She only had enough to buy a piece of candy for her father and each of her sisters and herself. You have no idea how surprized I was when on the bus she put a piece of candy in my hand and said, "No mami, I didn't buy this one for me. I bought it FOR YOU - silly mami."

How ridiculous is it that I STILL have that piece of 25 cent candy TWO YEARS LATER and I keep it in THAT box....?

Yes, I am quite blessed. She was only 9 years old.

I have this ridiculous idea in my head that when I do finally get my girls back I will show her the black box (that I also have old baby pics of and some random baby teeth LOL) and see if she remembers the candy.

I am willing to wager that she will... and even if she doesn't I hope that she will be touched when I tell her why I kept it all this time, because it was a selfless gift from HER.

I still have all the little rinkydink dollar store gifts and notes and cards that have survived all of the moving I have done. Lots of the stuff is broken but NO ONE is allowed to touch...

You are SO RIGHT when you said that we should cherish those that we love because one day you are saying good-bye to them as they head off to school and the next day you aren't their mother anymore...

Fathers be kind to your children and teach them how to love and respect their one and only mother as children are selfish by nature. Don't assume or leave such an important task up to a stranger.

And mothers be patient with and supportive of your children's fathers. They are human and tire too. Your children should always look upon them like they are ten feet tall... even though they are as fragile and flawed as YOU are.

And for those of us who had *less than stellar* parents, let's try to be aware of other men and women who are attempting to parent us and try not to focus on what you didn't get from your parents, but rather appreciate what the universe is giving you NOW....

AND PAY THAT FORWARD.

lol

 

[Bikini Mod]

lol

What can I say? I found something positive to share w/Velvett that I didn't mind sharing with the board.

Not into spreading hate... that shit gets old fast. Now spreading somethig positive, that just NEVER gets old w/me.



PS - Happy MotherFucker's Day Puddle.

 

[puddlemonkey]

I just found it funny lol. I didn't actually read any of it

 

[Bikini Mod]

I just found it funny lol. I didn't actually read any of it

liar, Liar, PANTS ON FIRE!!!

 

[cindylou]

lol and to all of u!

 

[nefertiti]

The best gift ever is to give someone something you know they have wanted but wouldn't buy for themselves and give it to them when they least expect it.

That is love, respect and loyalty - not some Hallmark holiday label on a calender.

You love someone make sure they know as often as possible because one day you may no longer have the opportunity.

I definitely agree on the last part....I always do frivilous things for my parents and siblings. I make more than my mom, dad, brother and sister COMBINED, so there are lots of things I can do for them. Things they don't need, but would enjoy and would never have the expendable income to get for themselves.

 

[heavy_duty]

I live in the big city, own more than one business and run in the rate race so I think the best thing one can give is their time. Kids and old folks need it and enjoy it.

 

[heavy_duty]

Ummmm you are missing the point as always. The school system that my children attended at the time (my youngest is only 11) were on of THE BEST in the State of NJ. How is it the responsibility of THE TEACHER to teach YOUR CHILD to honor their mother? I thought that stuff started at home. Lucky for your kids that it IS part of the curriculum (according to you).... eh?

Yet another successful yanking of the chain.
I thought you would have remembered I got you with this same topic last year.

 

[Pat_McCrotch]

Jesus H Christ... is your wife not the mother of YOUR children?

I could never understand men who had this idea.

So then, for Father's Day is it not your wife the one who helps YOUR kids make cards for you and show you other bits of appreciation when they are little?

The children follow the example of the parents... don't they?

And who best to teach a child that the greatest gift that he can give them is TO LOVE HER.... IF NOT THEIR FATHER?

I always feel anger coming from your posts. I bet your a cool chick ot hang with in downtown grapevine. I think the bar I have been to twice there is rusty's? Tons of Bikes outside.

Does the grump fish?

 

[Pat_McCrotch]

BAH

Neither my father nor myself ever did anything good enough for my mother - GOD I hate these commercial redundant holidays.

I think I know what Heavy is talking about - I know many girls/women that expect from their husbands a piece of jewelry for every child they have on mother's day and recognition on each of their children's birthdays. And if they do not receive it there will be hell to pay, so I can see why a guy might think "JFC when does it end?".

and how many days of the year do we get? maybe 2. Fathers day and our birhtday. Everyother hoilday is about the wominz.

 

[heavy_duty]

She's just so easy to torment and torture.

 

[Pat_McCrotch]

mothers are under-valued x 100

and daddy's x 1000

 

[Pat_McCrotch]

just another way for companies to suck every last cent out of a guy. most married guys are happy if they get sex from their wife on father's day, because their wives stop putting out. how fucking sad and pathetic is that?

It fucking sucks!!!!! Sometimes we have to resort to begging. I told mine I will never ever beg for sex again, but can we please have it one more time.

 

[Powerbuilder333]

starting a trend eh?

Let's hope so...

 

[Pat_McCrotch]

Some of you are honestly a bunch of curmudgeons. There's nothing wrong with having a special day to honor each of your parents, or the mother/father of your children. Sure, I told my parents I loved the all the time, did things for them all the time. But there really isn't harm in a "designated" day to have it be about that person. It can be fun for everyone involved unless you're going into it with a lemon in your mouth.

Jesus.

I had to look that one up. lol

 

[Pat_McCrotch]

exactly, my daughters school does not support any holidays at all due to many different cultures and backgrounds. Therefore the only way she will know it is moms day is if someone at home tells her about it.

and did needtoo do his job?

 

[Pat_McCrotch]

I always use days like this to show M'Lady how much she is valued in my household.
I help the kids arrange special treats and send a large bouquet of flowers to her work on friday so her catty co-workers realize her value as well.
She comes home beaming on friday....and stays that way through the weekend.

Doesn that make you feel good knowing you honored her in front of her co-workers? I love doing this but mine works in an OR an cannot get flowers there.

 

[Bikini Mod]

I always feel nger in your posts. I bet your a cool chick ot hang with in downtown grapevine. I think the bar I have been to twice there is rusty's? Tons of Bikes outside.

Does the grump fish?

No anger at all... When I am angry THERE IS NO DOUBT. LOL

The tavern we hang out at is The Tap Inn or we go down the other end of Main Street = Wilhoite's.

Well we haven't fished but he used to live on a boat so I am thinkin the old man is fairly proficient.

You in the Dallas/Ft Worth Metroplex? We should hang out sometime.

 

[Pat_McCrotch]

No anger at all... When I am angry THERE IS NO DOUBT. LOL

The tavern we hang out at is The Tap Inn or we go down the other end of Main Street = Wilhoite's.

Well we haven't fished but he used to live on a boat so I am thinkin the old man is fairly proficient.

You in the Dallas/Ft Worth Metroplex? We should hang out sometime.

I would love to hang with yall but I moved to california. I lived in mckinney and went to school in sherman. Lived in arlington for about a year right off 20 and ummm..damn i foget.... had a green in it. Lived with my girlfriend at the time. Just as you were coming in to arlington.

I fished Joe Pool many times and caught my biggest Hog there. 7 lbs 23.5 inches long.

 

[Bikini Mod]

I would love to hang with yall but I moved to california. I lived in mckinney and went to school in sherman. Lived in arlington for about a year right off 20 and ummm..damn i foget.... had a green in it. Lived with my girlfriend at the time. Just as you were coming in to arlington.

I fished Joe Pool many times and caught my biggest Hog there. 7 lbs 23.5 inches long.

LOL everytime we ride/drive by any body of water he says, "I wonder if there is fish in there."