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I know I know.
You're thinking "Damn bor, why would you get married, when you could have any woman you wanted, whenever you wanted her?"
It wasn't on purpose I swear. It was a prank gone bad, and now I'm sort of stuck.
So I'm out drinking with some friends the other night, and they decide they want to see some belly dancers. I'm all like, ok, cool, girls with low cut skirts and halter tops shaking their behinds. I'm down witht hat.
So were sitting at a small table next to some foreign guys, and they're going back and forth, the conversation is geting heated, and of course Im curious as to what is up. So I lean over and ask one of the guys " Dude, you seem upset, anything we can do to help." So he explains to me that he's negotiating a marriage for his daughter, and they're arguing over the size of the dowry. So I ask him, how much are you offering, and he says a hundred thousand (insert foreign word). Of course I'm curious, but cautious, because Im thinking she must be a real dog if hes willing to part with that much cash for her. So I casually ask him if he has a picture of his daughter. With a little wariness, he takes one out and shows me. The girl is gorgeous. Tan dark haired abd beautiful. So now Im realy suspicious, and I want to know if she still weighs the same as she did in the pic, if there is any hidden deformity etc. He assures me that his daughter is perfect in every way.
Right, all dads say the same thing.
So I ask what if the marriage doesnt work out, do you have to return the dowry. He assures em that would never happen, and if for any reason the daughter fails to please her husband, he can send her home in shame, and the family would decide whether or not she would even be allowed to live. Im thinking, well that sucks for her, but its always nice to have an out. You guys know what I mean
So my mind is working quick. Im thinking what the hell, even if 100k whatever the hell he says only comes out to $5 American, who cares, I mean Id do her for free. And if I get bored, I can always send her back. Plus Im getting tired of doing my own ironing, and since she probably doesnt speak english, she likely wont care what show Im watching on TV, they would all be gibberish to her anyway. So I tell him if the others wont agree, I'd gladly accept her for 100k of whatever you said.
Your thinking, yeah , what could go wrong, thats a sweetheart deal if I ever heard one. well hears the fly in the ointment. Apparently the currency of these people is sheep. I know your laughing thinking damn bor, where you gonna keep 100k sheep. Its even worse than that, I have to give him 100k sheep. Well it doesnt take to long before this guy is demanding payment, and apparently failure to do so would violate some kind of family honor, which wouldnt be healthy for me. So now I got to come up with 100,000 sheep.
LOL
WTF am I supposed to do? I don't even own any sheep. So I need some help. Im thinking of maybe buying 1000 sheep, and hoping they reproduce, you know like dogs or bunnies. But they need to do that fast, cause I only have six months to make payment. Any suggestions on how to make sheep especially horny? Im thinking of adding some alcohol to the water troth, and maybe playing some Barry White on loud speakers. Maybe some good sheep porno would help get everyone in the mood.
Also, if anyone has abny spare sheep they could part with, it would really be appreciated. This is a matter of life and death.
Thanks guys. Any help or advice is appreciated
You're thinking "Damn bor, why would you get married, when you could have any woman you wanted, whenever you wanted her?"
It wasn't on purpose I swear. It was a prank gone bad, and now I'm sort of stuck.
So I'm out drinking with some friends the other night, and they decide they want to see some belly dancers. I'm all like, ok, cool, girls with low cut skirts and halter tops shaking their behinds. I'm down witht hat.
So were sitting at a small table next to some foreign guys, and they're going back and forth, the conversation is geting heated, and of course Im curious as to what is up. So I lean over and ask one of the guys " Dude, you seem upset, anything we can do to help." So he explains to me that he's negotiating a marriage for his daughter, and they're arguing over the size of the dowry. So I ask him, how much are you offering, and he says a hundred thousand (insert foreign word). Of course I'm curious, but cautious, because Im thinking she must be a real dog if hes willing to part with that much cash for her. So I casually ask him if he has a picture of his daughter. With a little wariness, he takes one out and shows me. The girl is gorgeous. Tan dark haired abd beautiful. So now Im realy suspicious, and I want to know if she still weighs the same as she did in the pic, if there is any hidden deformity etc. He assures me that his daughter is perfect in every way.
Right, all dads say the same thing.So I ask what if the marriage doesnt work out, do you have to return the dowry. He assures em that would never happen, and if for any reason the daughter fails to please her husband, he can send her home in shame, and the family would decide whether or not she would even be allowed to live. Im thinking, well that sucks for her, but its always nice to have an out. You guys know what I mean
So my mind is working quick. Im thinking what the hell, even if 100k whatever the hell he says only comes out to $5 American, who cares, I mean Id do her for free. And if I get bored, I can always send her back. Plus Im getting tired of doing my own ironing, and since she probably doesnt speak english, she likely wont care what show Im watching on TV, they would all be gibberish to her anyway. So I tell him if the others wont agree, I'd gladly accept her for 100k of whatever you said.
Your thinking, yeah , what could go wrong, thats a sweetheart deal if I ever heard one. well hears the fly in the ointment. Apparently the currency of these people is sheep. I know your laughing thinking damn bor, where you gonna keep 100k sheep. Its even worse than that, I have to give him 100k sheep. Well it doesnt take to long before this guy is demanding payment, and apparently failure to do so would violate some kind of family honor, which wouldnt be healthy for me. So now I got to come up with 100,000 sheep.
LOL
WTF am I supposed to do? I don't even own any sheep. So I need some help. Im thinking of maybe buying 1000 sheep, and hoping they reproduce, you know like dogs or bunnies. But they need to do that fast, cause I only have six months to make payment. Any suggestions on how to make sheep especially horny? Im thinking of adding some alcohol to the water troth, and maybe playing some Barry White on loud speakers. Maybe some good sheep porno would help get everyone in the mood.
Also, if anyone has abny spare sheep they could part with, it would really be appreciated. This is a matter of life and death.
Thanks guys. Any help or advice is appreciated
