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Manowar
- Thread starter samoth
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ErikZ said:
Thats the problem! There is no way I'm going to hail crap, and there is no kill!
You've been brainwashed!
PuddleMonkey said:
Never!
BTW, I got Manowar's most recent single and fifth DVD last week. The second disc in the DVD has the footage from the first annual int'l Manowar fan club, with, like, an hour of Medieval Times-style amature swordplay and reenactment! The first DVD has Manowar's Earthshaker show in front of 25K fans in HD (26 HD cams = over 100 Tb's!!!), a 100-member philharmonic orchestra, a 100-member philharmonic choir, and FOH sound levels over 108 dB! Joey was awarded a doctorate in music from a national university for his recent work as well. Manowar calling out Wagner's relative was great, lol.
Hail and kill!
Powerbuilder333
Timeout? No, timeouts are for Plats
'Til The Blood On Your Sword Is The Blood Of The King!
Manowar has some of the coolest lyrics ever, which will always keep them in my top 5 favorite bands of all time.
Manowar has some of the coolest lyrics ever, which will always keep them in my top 5 favorite bands of all time.
HA! I've never seen this, lol.
http://www.fubarm.com/articles/funuz/11181999/manowar.htm
MANOWAR Vocalist Eric Adams Commits Suicide [Of course this is a joke article, we all know that Gods cannot die]
Manowar bass player, Joey Demaio, made a startling announcement on Monday, stating that a member of the metal brotherhood, lead vocalist Eric Adams, had commited suicide early Saturday morning when he found out that he had a friend who is not into metal.
"At first I thought the whole friend thing just a silly rumor," Joey said in the comfort of his completely leather clad home of big tittied metal bitches, "but when we finally confronted him, we learned the sad truth. I am here to announce a sad loss to the Manowar Brotherhood. Eric Adams, our former lead vocalist of 12 years had a friend who is not into heavy metal… and now Eric is dead."
Reports of those close to the band said Eric first met the cause of all this grief, Frank Fitts, at the Sacramento bar, Harleys and Bitches, during Manowar's recent tour of the west coast. "He seemed like a really great guy," explained Manowar tour manager and lead gaffer, Jim Hoover, "he said he loved to rock, drink and fuck and that's what Manowar's all about."
"Oh, fuck yeah," the saddened ex-vocalist echoed this sentiment in his final interview before killing himself, "he sure knew how to drink and fuck and we'd go to all these bars and fuck all these big tittied women. How was I to know? Man, those were some great nights. Heavy metal rules!!!"
Things reportedly got a little suspicious when during one night of drinking and fucking, Frank wore a Jethro Tull T-shirt. "I remember that night very well," said Manowar guitarist Karl Logan, "we were all drinking and fucking at the Backdoor Leather Bitches Saloon and hear comes Frank walking in with this fucking Tull shit on. I, of course, was instantly offended, but Eric didn't seem to mind so much. So, I fucking went off on him. I told that there's heavy metal or no metal all, and if Frank was into that flutey-hippy Tull shit, he was a wimp and a poser and he'd better just leave the bar."
"What can I say, I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt," defended Eric. "Man, the way he filled out those tight leather pants, I figured the dude had to be metal. And besides, fans send me all kinds of fucked up shit and maybe someone just gave him the shirt and maybe he in got dressed in the dark or something." The situation reportedly came to a head when the lead singer visited Frank's house.
"Yeah, we were out drinking and fucking one night and rode our Harley to Frank's place. I knew if I could just sneak a peak at his CD collection I would know for sure. We were just hanging on his leather couch and I decided to force the issue. I was like Frank, you seem like a cool guy and I know you like to drink and fuck, but I'm in the mood to fucking rock man. Crank up that stereo of yours man and let's melt our faces off. Heavy metal kicks ass!!!"
"Frank put in a Pink Floyd CD," said Manowar drummer Scott Columbus with a smirk. "I fucking knew he was a wimp and a poser and that was also the time we knew Eric had to leave the band." Which, in Manowar, is no small task. "When you're part of Manowar, you're in for life," explained Joey Demaio. "We signed our record contract in blood and Manowar is not just a band, it's a way of life. The only way out of this brotherhood is to die. Joey committed high treason in this heavy metal government and he had to leave. But we loved him like a brother and therefore offered him a respectable heavy metal suicide." On Friday night lead singer reportedly turned in his leather cod piece to the band and on Saturday morning the lead singer was found dead after he and his Harley Chopper were found crashed into the side of the Harleys and Bitches Bar and Grill. Pinned to his leather jacket was this suicide note, which FuBARM obtained from our resourceful columnists:
Hail to thee my metal brethren! If you are reading this, I have ridden my Harley to the big titty bar in the sky. For I had done a terrible thing. I had a friend who was not into heavy metal and in doing so, I have failed all that is Manowar. Frank seemed nice enough, but let this just be a lesson: wimps and posers can be well disguised as cool metal dudes. Learn from my lesson and ostracize everyone you know until they are into heavy metal and worthy of your friendship. You never know who might be a wimp and poser in disguise! Keep drinking and fucking! Long live Heavy Metal!!!
When asked about Manowar's future, Karl Logan was confident. "There's not one vocalist on this planet who wouldn't get on they're hands and knees and beg to be in this band. We are the greatest band on the planet and death to false metal." When asked about how they could possibly be serious because they really are the cheesiest metal band on the planet and are only famous in Europe, a country who loves Kylie Monogue, Joey Demaio replied, "Death to thee metal poser!!! All other bands play, Manowar kill!!!"
When asked if killing was wrong, Joey replied, "shut up."
http://www.fubarm.com/articles/funuz/11181999/manowar.htm
MANOWAR Vocalist Eric Adams Commits Suicide [Of course this is a joke article, we all know that Gods cannot die]
Manowar bass player, Joey Demaio, made a startling announcement on Monday, stating that a member of the metal brotherhood, lead vocalist Eric Adams, had commited suicide early Saturday morning when he found out that he had a friend who is not into metal.
"At first I thought the whole friend thing just a silly rumor," Joey said in the comfort of his completely leather clad home of big tittied metal bitches, "but when we finally confronted him, we learned the sad truth. I am here to announce a sad loss to the Manowar Brotherhood. Eric Adams, our former lead vocalist of 12 years had a friend who is not into heavy metal… and now Eric is dead."
Reports of those close to the band said Eric first met the cause of all this grief, Frank Fitts, at the Sacramento bar, Harleys and Bitches, during Manowar's recent tour of the west coast. "He seemed like a really great guy," explained Manowar tour manager and lead gaffer, Jim Hoover, "he said he loved to rock, drink and fuck and that's what Manowar's all about."
"Oh, fuck yeah," the saddened ex-vocalist echoed this sentiment in his final interview before killing himself, "he sure knew how to drink and fuck and we'd go to all these bars and fuck all these big tittied women. How was I to know? Man, those were some great nights. Heavy metal rules!!!"
Things reportedly got a little suspicious when during one night of drinking and fucking, Frank wore a Jethro Tull T-shirt. "I remember that night very well," said Manowar guitarist Karl Logan, "we were all drinking and fucking at the Backdoor Leather Bitches Saloon and hear comes Frank walking in with this fucking Tull shit on. I, of course, was instantly offended, but Eric didn't seem to mind so much. So, I fucking went off on him. I told that there's heavy metal or no metal all, and if Frank was into that flutey-hippy Tull shit, he was a wimp and a poser and he'd better just leave the bar."
"What can I say, I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt," defended Eric. "Man, the way he filled out those tight leather pants, I figured the dude had to be metal. And besides, fans send me all kinds of fucked up shit and maybe someone just gave him the shirt and maybe he in got dressed in the dark or something." The situation reportedly came to a head when the lead singer visited Frank's house.
"Yeah, we were out drinking and fucking one night and rode our Harley to Frank's place. I knew if I could just sneak a peak at his CD collection I would know for sure. We were just hanging on his leather couch and I decided to force the issue. I was like Frank, you seem like a cool guy and I know you like to drink and fuck, but I'm in the mood to fucking rock man. Crank up that stereo of yours man and let's melt our faces off. Heavy metal kicks ass!!!"
"Frank put in a Pink Floyd CD," said Manowar drummer Scott Columbus with a smirk. "I fucking knew he was a wimp and a poser and that was also the time we knew Eric had to leave the band." Which, in Manowar, is no small task. "When you're part of Manowar, you're in for life," explained Joey Demaio. "We signed our record contract in blood and Manowar is not just a band, it's a way of life. The only way out of this brotherhood is to die. Joey committed high treason in this heavy metal government and he had to leave. But we loved him like a brother and therefore offered him a respectable heavy metal suicide." On Friday night lead singer reportedly turned in his leather cod piece to the band and on Saturday morning the lead singer was found dead after he and his Harley Chopper were found crashed into the side of the Harleys and Bitches Bar and Grill. Pinned to his leather jacket was this suicide note, which FuBARM obtained from our resourceful columnists:
Hail to thee my metal brethren! If you are reading this, I have ridden my Harley to the big titty bar in the sky. For I had done a terrible thing. I had a friend who was not into heavy metal and in doing so, I have failed all that is Manowar. Frank seemed nice enough, but let this just be a lesson: wimps and posers can be well disguised as cool metal dudes. Learn from my lesson and ostracize everyone you know until they are into heavy metal and worthy of your friendship. You never know who might be a wimp and poser in disguise! Keep drinking and fucking! Long live Heavy Metal!!!
When asked about Manowar's future, Karl Logan was confident. "There's not one vocalist on this planet who wouldn't get on they're hands and knees and beg to be in this band. We are the greatest band on the planet and death to false metal." When asked about how they could possibly be serious because they really are the cheesiest metal band on the planet and are only famous in Europe, a country who loves Kylie Monogue, Joey Demaio replied, "Death to thee metal poser!!! All other bands play, Manowar kill!!!"
When asked if killing was wrong, Joey replied, "shut up."
Editorial Review:
"Manowar is a band that has set standards, broken records and won great accolades during its storied career. Known to their worldwide supporters as the "Kings Of Metal", the band has constantly redefined heavy metal by combining peerless musicianship and song writing with their undeniable commitment to true metal and their devoted fans. The band has always made the solemn pledge to create original music that is louder than hell and stronger than steel. The long standing lineup of vocalist Eric Adams, guitarist Karl Logan, drummer Scott Columbus and bassist Joey DeMaio is truly a force to be reckoned with in the studio and on stage. In addition they are the originators of the musical styles known as power metal and true metal.
As Manowar now prepares to unveil their tenth studio album, expectations from fans are higher than ever and Manowar are sure to exceed those expectations. The new album Gods Of War is Manowar's first entry in a cycle of concept albums; each a tribute to a different war god. Gods Of War brings out the greatest of Manowar's musical attributes by utilizing both epic song structures and dramatic narratives. Much like Ragnarok - the final battle at the end of the world - when listening to Manowar's epic saga, the earth will shake, the walls will crumble and only true fans of metal will remain standing, heads held high, with the triumphant glimmer of a battle well-fought in their eyes.
Gods Of War features brand new cover artwork by the world's leading fantasy artist Ken Kelly, as well as a scorching mix done by the unparalleled Ronald Prent.
Besides the normal Jewel Case version, Gods Of War will also be released as a limited edition in an embossed metal slipcase containing a high grade mediabook bound in leather.Furthermore, this limited edition will feature a bonus DVD with unreleased material about the making of this album and some special behind-the-scenes footage. A double-vinyl LP in a gatefold sleeve will also be available.
In their career Manowar has released 9 studio albums, two live albums and 5 DVDs with sales of over nine million records worldwide, as well as silver and gold records and numerous other industry awards. The last studio album Warriors Of The World was a critically-acclaimed worldwide chart topper, reaching gold status in Germany."
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