The Machine: man I appreciate the advice. I kinda took some baby steps today. I was over at my friend's house today (got my parents car) and made out with a hot chick and she grabbed my cock...but I turned her down...I couldn't do anything more, I just couldn't. It was fucked up but she is going to be there until Sunday...
I told my ex about it and tomorrow is her big decision. It is her last day to enroll at the local school and she was acting like she doesn't know if she is or not. We are going to meet up, maybe for the last time tomorrow. I could hear it in her voice....she isn't stringing me along. She doesn't know where her life is heading or if she is going to make the decision she will regret for the rest of her life...
I am currently drunk off my ass and wired, and listening to "Cold - Stupid Girl" on repeat, it's kinda cool. All I can think about is being with my baby.
I was telling alot of stories to my friend tonight...He was telling me how he could relate, he is a little older than me and has been through some fucked up shit with a girl he was with for 3 years (this same girl tried to fuck me, lol). He was telling me the same thing, let the fuck go, just let it go. We are gonna hit the clubs this weekend fo sho, regardless. I guess no matter what I think the best thing that can happen for me is my ex to just break it off and make her decision. I got plenty of support now, I just...can't make the decision on my own....I just can't....