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HappyScrappy
New member
This morning I woke up as I usually do, soaked in sweat, half naked on the floor of the bathroom. I stood up and hacked into the sink, enjoying the patterns it left as it made its way down the marbled surface over the gold sink fixtures.
I looked into the mirror and let forth a wild yawp that only us living on the edge, pushing life to the extreme, the edge can do - you know, all that kinda stuff that makes the metaphorically challenged quake in their booties.
I looked into the mirror and knew that I was gonna have a great day - I was nearly swooning myself right at that moment, let alone the impression I knew I would leave on the countless droves of women that would be throwing themselves at me all day. I ran some dish soap through my hair and I gargled rubbing alcohol and then went out on my way, nearly tripping over my pants that were conveniently around my ankles - a nice reminder that I still had to pee.
After relieving myself in the shower I made my way out to the kitchen. Here I did 500 pushups and then flexed in the reflective surface of my very expensive refridgerator. My most muscular pose is one of my best features aside from my hair. I cracked open the freezer and ate a few jello pops - I'm on a diet.
I ran to the door - I do a lot of cardio these days - and shuffled over to my car. I'd tell you what it is, but you'd just be jealous. But it has tinted windows and a really big muffler, so try to contain the rage that I know must be building inside.
I sped off to the gym where I was about to show women what men were meant to look like. I tossed on my headband and entered the establishment with a "can I get a HELL YEAH!" and then proceeded to slap random people on the back in order to garner as much attention as I could from the awed public inside.
I walked over to the bench and put a whole bunch of weight on there and then grunted a lot and made farting sounds with my hand in my armpits (supersizeme gave me this lil' tip and I must say that my bench skyrocketed up 5lbs that first week I tried it - it has since gone down 20lbs, but life is a constant struggle).
After lots of screaming and pushing, sweating and a few farts, I got the weight up and down once and then threw it back... my work was done here.
As I predicted, women were swooning left and right... my plan was working perfectly - I have a way of dealing with people... it is part of living my life to the fullest.
I have to pee - perhaps I will elaborate more later - I have a nap and some modesty lessons on my way first.
ROCK ON!!!
I looked into the mirror and let forth a wild yawp that only us living on the edge, pushing life to the extreme, the edge can do - you know, all that kinda stuff that makes the metaphorically challenged quake in their booties.
I looked into the mirror and knew that I was gonna have a great day - I was nearly swooning myself right at that moment, let alone the impression I knew I would leave on the countless droves of women that would be throwing themselves at me all day. I ran some dish soap through my hair and I gargled rubbing alcohol and then went out on my way, nearly tripping over my pants that were conveniently around my ankles - a nice reminder that I still had to pee.
After relieving myself in the shower I made my way out to the kitchen. Here I did 500 pushups and then flexed in the reflective surface of my very expensive refridgerator. My most muscular pose is one of my best features aside from my hair. I cracked open the freezer and ate a few jello pops - I'm on a diet.
I ran to the door - I do a lot of cardio these days - and shuffled over to my car. I'd tell you what it is, but you'd just be jealous. But it has tinted windows and a really big muffler, so try to contain the rage that I know must be building inside.
I sped off to the gym where I was about to show women what men were meant to look like. I tossed on my headband and entered the establishment with a "can I get a HELL YEAH!" and then proceeded to slap random people on the back in order to garner as much attention as I could from the awed public inside.
I walked over to the bench and put a whole bunch of weight on there and then grunted a lot and made farting sounds with my hand in my armpits (supersizeme gave me this lil' tip and I must say that my bench skyrocketed up 5lbs that first week I tried it - it has since gone down 20lbs, but life is a constant struggle).
After lots of screaming and pushing, sweating and a few farts, I got the weight up and down once and then threw it back... my work was done here.
As I predicted, women were swooning left and right... my plan was working perfectly - I have a way of dealing with people... it is part of living my life to the fullest.
I have to pee - perhaps I will elaborate more later - I have a nap and some modesty lessons on my way first.
ROCK ON!!!
