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Kids...!!!

The Ranger

The Ranger

New member
I think they're too many kids in the world right now......You have to earn the right from childhood to adulthood.

How dare he say???

PLAYGROUNDS

Pure and simple....Good Ole Fashioned 70's style PLAYGROUNDS.

Not these fairy tail wonderlands he have today. Where there's powdery, soft sand, or scented wood chips.

Naw Baby-Doll....

I'm talking asphalt....Yes sir, hard as fuck, skin your goddamn knees, bust your head, break your fucking bones, hot as holy hell...ASPHALT.

That's why when you young'uns see us 30 and over crowd talking about scars and broken bones....We earned every damn one.

BUT.....Let us not forget the Teeter-Tooter shall we....Invented by some German Back-Quack....Or often refered to as the fat-fuckers revenge. Though I have seen, many, many times, it used as a means to launch the class midget into space....heh heh heh.

Monkey Bars!!!!!....Sit down young'uns....Monkey bars back in the day were 12 stories tall....And some fucking clown decided to shape it like a rocket for shits and giggles...May that bastard rot in hell!!!....And some smart ass 12th grader always got a kick out of smearing the top bar with vasoline....I hope you die too....

Slides....Yeah Right Babe....Pull my finger and I'll whistle jingle bells for ya too....Slides today....attached to one side of the swing I might add.....2 FEET TALL.....2 FEET mind you....Back in the day....We called that a ramp!!!......Us old broken fuckers remember that gem! We fucking invented vert....difference is....they got rich, we got broken bones showing them how to do it....heh heh heh

OUR SLIDES....Our Slides were 6 stories tall....Solid, shiney, hot, mid-July, leave burn scars... METAL....Not slanted....true verticle....Ladies remember this polyester, short pants, summertime, wonder....heh heh heh

Hey....How about Lawn Darts.....Hehh heh heh....Remember this classic piece....Take sharpened dart, attach areo-dynamic wings, walk backwards 20 feet....then toss in the direction of your asshole cousin Bobby's feet....I think there was a few other parts....something about a plastic rings....well, anyway it ended up in an asswhupping and another scar...

Bikes, ramps, skateboards, even shit that hasn't been invented yet....we did that to dammit....Cause we got SCARS...We did that shit, barefooted, no shin guards, elbow pads, knee pads, helment....Naw Sir...We did it flat out....And stayed scabby for it most of the summer as well....

So go back to your playstation(We called it PONG...did that shit to)....Then watch Survivor and mutter how you could do that shit...Yup....We invented Survivor too...But, back in the day....We called it a backyard camp out....Hehh heh heh hehjh

See...The shit you watch and wish you could do...been there...done that, and now we're adults....And bery, beryy, toned(In Elmer Fudd voice)

Goodnight....That is all....

Ranger
 
Agree! No more kids unless they can have playground battle scars like The Ranger and the Dcup! Sorry Mommies and Daddies you have to get rid of your kids! It is the humane thing to do! The non playground pain they will experiance is just to cruel! Man do I miss Bicycle tag, BB gun Wars, Rock fights, and Smear The Queer!

PS lawn darts are the shit! Almost ended the Dcup as an eight year old, but it was well worth it!
 
Fcuk Yes....Stand up parents....UNITE I tell ya....Remember the kinda shit we got for Christmas and Birthdays...???

Wrist-Rockets and Red Ryder BB Guns....For what dare the young'uns ask???

Why to do battle against each other...And our parents knew...All they ever said was..." Don't shot at the eyes! "

And what the fuck do you think was the first thing we aimed at....heh heh heh

Bowl Two....

Ranger
 
The Ranger said:

So go back to your playstation(We called it PONG...did that shit to)....Then watch Survivor and mutter how you could do that shit...Yup....We invented Survivor too...But, back in the day....We called it a backyard camp out....Hehh heh heh hehjh

Ranger
Click to expand...

Great post man. Its just so true, Whenever I go anywhere with my mother she is always asking where all the kids are? and why arent they out playing? And I begin to explain that they are all sitting home paying video games and watching TV. Kids dont know how to have a good time anymore, its sad.
 
Shit man, they didn't even have cures for the kinda diseases we had back in the day.....so we fucking cured ourselves.....

No one remembers flip-flop toes....We Do.....Our flip-flops back in the day were rubber, with a plastic razor blade between your toes....You's be out wlaking trying to act like the shit....and some cocksucker would walk up behind you and step on your heel...the forward momentum would cause the rest of the foot to snap forward at warp speed....thus splitting the toes webbing from toe joint to knee cap.....

Cured by an 8th grade girl who put toilet paper between her toes...and BANG!!!

Yup....We invented that to....

Heh heh heh heh

Bowl three


Ranger
 
Hell fucking yes!!!

The current 18 year olds think they invented "extreme". What a bunch of horse shit.

Here's how we played lawn darts. My buddy and I would stand about 40-50 feet apart. 1 person would have both darts. The first dart was thrown as high as you could on a arc that would hit close to the other guy. You threw the other dart as hard as you could on a much shallower angle, also trying to hit the guy, and trying to make sure both darts hit at the same time. The whole purpose of the game was to survive. We even had a wooden fence as a backstop on 1 side and as dull as those darts were, often times 1 dart would hit the fence and stick in about an inch or 2. Now, THAT'S a good fucking time!

Skateboarding! They have all these same little parks with all sorts of padding now. We had a freshly paved long ass hill in the middle of my neighborhood. The goal... SURVIVE! Start at the top and haul ass all the way down. At the bottom of the hill was a "T" intersection where not only did cars drive by, but the road changed to a rougher gravel. IF you could make the turn onto the road you were at the top of another hill only on rougher pavement. HELMETS???? We don't need no stinking helmets!!!! You were a god if you could do the whole course without bailing out. (Which I could do :D )

Street Luge? BAH!!! We invented it. When we mastered the downhill run, we started doing sitting down on our old ass skateboards!!!

I live my life by 1 simple motto "Chicks dig scars"
 
Wind surfing....heh heh heh...

1 wagon
2 broom handles
1 large sheet
1 huge ass hill
and
last
of all
1 big double dare....

Wind surfing, sky diving, and sky acrobatics in one 15 second decent....

We done it all, and did it our way baby....heh heh heh

Breather.....<pant>

Ranger
 
Hey Fro,

How about night lawn darts....2 kids, two darts, stand back to back, throw high as you can at the same time.....then run like fucking holy hell.....

We called it Suicide Darts.....

Ranger
 
I think we all know who really invented "base jumping"...

I DID!! And every other kid that climbed up on the house and jumped off with either a sheet or an umbrella for a parachute!
 
Suicide Darts!! :FRlol: Never tried that one. We used to soak tennis balls in gasoline though. Light em up and kick em down the street and night and they look cool as hell. We would also play a form of racketball. Kick the flaming tennis ball against a wall and try to hit your buddy.



It's no wonder I was fast and agile kid.
 
frorider6 said:
Hell fucking yes!!!

The current 18 year olds think they invented "extreme". What a bunch of horse shit.

Here's how we played lawn darts. My buddy and I would stand about 40-50 feet apart. 1 person would have both darts. The first dart was thrown as high as you could on a arc that would hit close to the other guy. You threw the other dart as hard as you could on a much shallower angle, also trying to hit the guy, and trying to make sure both darts hit at the same time. The whole purpose of the game was to survive. We even had a wooden fence as a backstop on 1 side and as dull as those darts were, often times 1 dart would hit the fence and stick in about an inch or 2. Now, THAT'S a good fucking time!

Skateboarding! They have all these same little parks with all sorts of padding now. We had a freshly paved long ass hill in the middle of my neighborhood. The goal... SURVIVE! Start at the top and haul ass all the way down. At the bottom of the hill was a "T" intersection where not only did cars drive by, but the road changed to a rougher gravel. IF you could make the turn onto the road you were at the top of another hill only on rougher pavement. HELMETS???? We don't need no stinking helmets!!!! You were a god if you could do the whole course without bailing out. (Which I could do :D )

Street Luge? BAH!!! We invented it. When we mastered the downhill run, we started doing sitting down on our old ass skateboards!!!

I live my life by 1 simple motto "Chicks dig scars"
Click to expand...

That's right all of this "Jackass" crap had nothing on us! That was just typical when school was out we would do that shit! As pre teens even! All these Johnny Knoxville wanabees dying! Us old school kids would survive anything, cause we were tough and we hid Playboys, cigs, and old beer in our dirt forts!
 
DcupSheepNipples said:


That's right all of this "Jackass" crap had nothing on us! That was just typical when school was out we would do that shit! As pre teens even! All these Johnny Knoxville wanabees dying! Us old school kids would survive anything, cause we were tough and we hid Playboys, cigs, and old beer in our dirt forts!
Click to expand...

My friend and I split a beer we found in a ditch on the side of the road. :FRlol:
 
frorider6 said:
Suicide Darts!! :FRlol: Never tried that one. We used to soak tennis balls in gasoline though. Light em up and kick em down the street and night and they look cool as hell. We would also play a form of racketball. Kick the flaming tennis ball against a wall and try to hit your buddy.



It's no wonder I was fast and agile kid.
Click to expand...

I loved bat attack! Two wooden baseball bats! One for each kid! you ran around and beat the shit out of each other until someone called uncle! Paint ball today WTF is that! Pure Pussy if you ask me!
 
My brother and I attacked the neighbor's house one 4th of July midnight with about $80 worth of fireworks. They were the snobs of the subdivision and they had just built a new pool and we were trying to pollute it as much as possible.

Fucking out of control kids.... Oh wait, that was when I was 18. :D
 
Anyone remember making potatoe guns.....cut out cans, tape a shit pile of them together, leave a hole at the bottom, fill with lighter fluid, add tennis ball or potatoe....then strike a match and insert into hole....

Heh heh heh

Ranger
 
When I was 8, which was just about 25 years ago, I shot my neighbour in the ass with my BB gun, now yoiu can get locked up for that shit!
 
When I got bored and didn't have any friends to play with, I would shoot my BB gun straight up in the air and stand as still as possible and try to have the BB hit me. Fun for hours.
 
I lived near a big plot of desert, we would take our 80cc dirtbikes out there and set bums forts on fire, much fun.
 
Anyone remember making potatoe guns.....cut out cans, tape a shit pile of them together, leave a hole at the bottom, fill with lighter fluid, add tennis ball or potatoe....then strike a match and insert into hole....
Click to expand...

I posted plans pre Plat. of a potato gun! Other than a few members every one thought i was crazy old fool! PVC pipe works better! I can't even list all the potential lethal weapons home made explosives and flammable liquids that I used to "Play" with as a old school kid! Today you would end up in Camp X-Ray in Cuba if you played like us old school kids did!
 
Ffactor said:
Did you have one of them pump up BB guns that could shoot .177 caliber pellets too?
Click to expand...

Pellets were and still are the shit! I think I single handly killed off several species of lizards and birds! Take that PETA, I was a minor! What ya gonna do now?
 
Last edited:
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.........2 ten year olds, 2 wrist rockets, 2 frogs, 2 model cars, lighterfluid, 1 pack of matches, and most of all...1 pack of firecarckers.

Need I say more.....

Remember getting a HUGE piece of cardboard, like a refridg came in....then wiat until the grass is good and burnt from the hot ass sun....hit a fucking killer hill and haul ass to the bottom.....

Sleds....We had SLEDS back in the day....Solid metal runners, and sharp as fuck....kids still cringe when we recall that horrible affliction....Frostbite-Sled Fingers.....Luckily, it generally cured itself after three years of steady thawing.....

Ranger
 
The Ranger said:
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.........2 ten year olds, 2 wrist rockets, 2 frogs, 2 model cars, lighterfluid, 1 pack of matches, and most of all...1 pack of firecarckers.

Need I say more.....

Remember getting a HUGE piece of cardboard, like a refridg came in....then wiat until the grass is good and burnt from the hot ass sun....hit a fucking killer hill and haul ass to the bottom.....

Sleds....We had SLEDS back in the day....Solid metal runners, and sharp as fuck....kids still cringe when we recall that horrible affliction....Frostbite-Sled Fingers.....Luckily, it generally cured itself after three years of steady thawing.....

Ranger
Click to expand...

I lacked snow! But we did the old Fridge down the steep grassy hill! No helments no pads and when you hit a boulder it looked like a car wreck! Sniff Sniff to be a old school kid again! So many scars, so many stories:bawling:
 
The Ranger said:
4 Little Words.....

DIRT BIKE MUFFLER SCARS

Ranger
Click to expand...

Fuck that, muffler scars are for pussys! I got one right off the carburetor of one of my bikes and it left bar b q lines on my thigh!

Before you ask Ranger...Yes I am. Bwhwhahahahahahaha
 
kronk said:


Fuck that, muffler scars are for pussys! I got one right off the carburetor of one of my bikes and it left bar b q lines on my thigh!

Before you ask Ranger...Yes I am. Bwhwhahahahahahaha
Click to expand...

That's all! Me and my buddies used to throw scolding hot water over each other! Who ever went longest without screaming with flesh falling off would win! That was just a joke, but in another 20-30 years I bet that's what I will tell my grandkids!
 
....and another thing. Kids seem to spend a lot of time indoors now days. I live in MN. It didn't matter how cold it was in the winter or how hot it was in the summer-- my mom was always screaming "go play outside". Our life was constant physical activity.

When it was hailing out my grandma would always give us measuring cups to collect ice chunks in. lol Now a kid wouldn't be allowed to go out in the hail...and if they did they'd need a mouth gaurd and a helmet.
 
Hell, now that I recall some of the things I did, I guess I'm lucky to be alive!

I remember one time, I found a bag in the basement of my neighbors house with some bullets in it. I called up some friends, we got some gasoline, and went in the woods. We lit a fire and threw some in it, then ran like crazy. One time I just barely got missed! What the hell was I thinking?!

The old playground my mom would take me to had this huge slide, about 2 stories high, in the shape of a rocket ship, you would climb to the top, and go down that hot ass metal slide in the summer. The whole structure was really shakey too. I always thought it would just crumble one day. Good times!

Sleding was the best! I would always look for a bigger hill. When I was in the 4th grade, I went to a school that had a steep slope, that was made of rocks, that led from the 3rd floor level, to the ground level which was the playyard. It was a real nice snowstorm one day, and I decided that would be better than any hill. Nearly shit my pants going down, hell, I probably did. Again, lot's of fun!

I seriously feel bad for kids today. It's all about video games, tv and online. If I sat in front of the tv all day, unless I was sick, my mom would turn it off, and make me go outside. Hell, she never had to! I always wanted to go out. Toss the football around, take my model rockets, and bend the rod so I could now launch them as little missles at shit LOL, go ride bikes, etc.

Remember when there was the one fat kid in school, and everyone made fun of him? Now you look around, or visit an old school of yours, you will see the fat kids are now the majority. I guess watching tv, and playing video games all day won't just rot your mind, but your body too!


ps. I did love my atari 2600 and c64 though. Always good for late night fun. :D
 
I just thought of a tale my dad told me. When he was a kid their town had blood drives at the local fire department. After the drives, the people running the show would toss the used needles and little hoses with blood leftover in them behind the building. So of course the kids would pull them out of the garbage and stick them in each other, dogs, cats, etc. lol That just wouldn't happen now....it's a great mental picture though.
 
Damn, I had almost forgot those muffler scars! I didn't have a minibike though! :( I did however score a moped when I was 11 for $40.00, I mowed a couple of lawns, and took that sucker. I would ride all around the creek woods in it, and one time a cop stopped me, told me I needed a license and plate to drive it! I told him I had thought it was a minibike. Oops, oh well! Me and a friend were popping wheelies on it, and the tire popped, fell to the side, and gave us both a nasty ass muffler burn. Ahhh, the joys of being a kid.
 
C3bodybuilding said:
, take my model rockets, and bend the rod so I could now launch them as little missles at shit LOL,
Click to expand...
Haha, We made the coolest Shoulder Fired rocket launcher using a model rocket kit, and a peice of PVC tube. It was deadly.
 
this is what we did when we were bored

boobs2.gif
 
Hahahahahahahahahahahahqhha.....too fucking funny......

Neighbor's pets.....heh heh heh....remember those days....<evil snicker>

Ranger
 
Ranger you are killing me -- Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Lawn darts werent' big, but anyone ever play "Spread" w/ a good pocket knife? We didn't pay $120 for our tennis shoes back then so it didnt' matter as much I guess.

Anything you could shoot or blow up with a bb gun or a ladyfinger was fair game!

Ahhhh, the good ol' days :)
 
What no one going to mention why m-80's were outlawed? It's because kids were letting them explode in their hands/pockets/animals etc. Now that is work!! Hell you used to be able to buy small explosive packs at any store, now you have to go to a special store show I.D.-and sign some crap document . What about school, it used to be the teachers beating ass with a 2x4 not some punk kid trying to bully some weak puny midget kid, also people knew how to shoot rifles and handguns, not this shooting sideways crap. I'm not even bringing up Happy Fun Ball......
 
Snipe hunting, playing ghost in the graveyard.....amking out and getting to feel a chix tit's and bragging about it the next day.....hahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Hand-be-downs....try that shit with kids today....

And we had play clothes and school clothes....Seems like this is forgotten as well.....

Ranger
 
kids

Do they even make knee patches for jeans anymore. I don't think I had one pair of toughskin jeans that the knees were'nt worn out of them. I bet moms nowadays wouldn't even know how to sew patches on jeans if they had to.
 
DB, I had almost forgotten about firecrackers! I told my friend once, that it had a delayed fuse, and to hold it, if he dropped it, it wouldn't go off. Hold it after the fuse is gone for at least 2 seconds. LMAO His hand was pitch black, and bleeding, nothing too bad though!


And yes Ranger, creeks were an endless source of saturday fun. With trees, the streams, mud, rocks... you could have days loads of fun!

As for the wooden paddles from the teacher, damn I remember that! One of my old teachers had a holes drilled into the paddle, so it would suck up some of your skin when she smacked you with it! This was in the 80s too. Crazy! Today if a teacher used that on you, it would be lawsuit time, but funny, there were no school shootings back then either. Hmmmm, maybe a good ol' ass whupping is what kids need! I know it gave me some character lol.
 
Heh heh heh....School Paddles, God does that bring back memories...When we were in the 3rd grade, there was this horrible rumor the Principal had and electric paddel...We believed that shit back then....

Our teachers would march us to lunch, and carry their paddles by their side, it was almost like they were walking a beat on some city corner in New York....

Could you imagine if that went on today in schools!!! My God, 60 minutes would have a field day with that.....

All this shit about kids killing teachers and students because they were picked on by classmates...Boo-Fucking-Hoo....

They don't know what being picked on was....Back in the day, we were down right cruel to fuckers, and yes we fought like hell, but no one ever got shot, no one ever got stabbed, and eventually we became closer friends because of it.....

Easter Sunday....Make a kid go outside today....

Let me ask all of you a question....

When was the last time you even heard of a kid lately bragging about getting stitches??? Back in the day, you were measured by how many stitches you got over the summer....Hahahahahahahahahahahaha

Peace,

Ranger
 
How about those wood burning sets...Remember those gems?? I had permenate scars until I was 18 from that Christmas wonder...And nothing ever came out the way shit looked on the box....

And that field goal game where you smash the head of the kicker and he kicks the ball 300 feet.....heh heh heh....or, the football game that just virbrated and the little men just bounced around on that metal playing field....

Ah....The good ole days of fun and wonderment....

Ranger
 
I still have a scar next to my right eye from 4th grade, when fat ass Betty Mendez decided to jump on the back of the see-saw on the opposite side I was on. Only time I've ever been Airborne.
 
ahhhh dodge ball....how i used to love to cream people in that game....nothing like pounding someone you dislike in the face with a small red playground ball....hehehehe
 
Dodge ball....Nowdays they have a volleyball, football, basketball, etc. For any game the children wish to play....

We had that red, rubber ball....You could use that fucker for anything, kick the hell out of it, punt it, dodge ball, basketball, kickball...etc. One ball fit all sports....

Wonder if they still make that red bastard???

Heh heh heh

Ranger
 
The Ranger said:

Why to do battle against each other...And our parents knew...All they ever said was..." Don't shot at the eyes! "
Click to expand...

Yeah, I remember this, sadly. I honest to God saw a friend get shot directly in his eye. He lost all sight from that side, and the most disgusting thing was - not that his eyeball bloomed out like mashed potatos - but he was only 7 years old.

You don't really think about this kind of shit when you are at that age. You think you will live forever and never get seriously hurt.
 
Clackers ---- Two balls of glass on a string. Objective...hit them together as hard and fast as possible. LOL!!! I busted two sets up.
 
Little league baseball from the time I was able to swing a bat and thought I could hit a ball. Where the hell did "T" ball come from?
 
AAP said:


Yeah, I remember this, sadly. I honest to God saw a friend get shot directly in his eye. He lost all sight from that side, and the most disgusting thing was - not that his eyeball bloomed out like mashed potatos - but he was only 7 years old.

Click to expand...

We had a guy in junior high/high school like that. He was in a wheel chair for doing something fucked up with a dirtbike.

Then he and a friend had the balls to go out and play shoot em up with BB guns, shooting at each other (vision: kid in wheelchair playing "Bandit" with a BB gun) :D

He had one eye shot out because of that. On one hand it was sadly funny because of his shitty luck. On the other it was sad, because he was already fucked up, and this incident made it worse.
 
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