Joke Centre!

[GrandMaster]

alright, thought i would try something out...
since lots of us are at work.. home bored,.. loafin' at the comp reading up...
we all could use a laugh...so post ur jokes here.

i'll go first, i have nothing rite now, but i'll try

1. Two irish men walk out of a bar one nite!...........





..........what? it could happen!!


2. Guy at the Whorehouse
This guy goes to a whorehouse and says to the Madam, "I want to get screwed."

The Madam tells him to go up to room #12 and knock on the door. The guy walks up to the door, knocks on it, and says, "I really want to get screwed, bad!"

A very sexy voice replies "Just slide $20 under the door."

So the man slides the $20 under the door and waits... Nothing Happens! He knocks on the door again, and yells out "I want to get screwed!"

The sexy voice behind the door answers, "Again?"




.... i tried lol cant think rite now

 

[psychedout]

Heres one of my favorites:

A a guy and his wife have been having sex for 20 years. But the guy always insists on turning the lights off when they have sex. Never in there 20 years together have the ever been turned on. One day, the lights mysteriously came on while they were having sex. She looked down and saw her husband was using a dildo.

She got up swearing and said "explain this to me! explain this to me!"

His reply "I can explain this, but you explain the kids!"

 

[help4john]

Q: What's the difference between a rooster and a prostitute?

A: A rooster says "Cock-a-doodle-doooo" and a prostitute says "Any cock will do!"

Pretty shitty, huh.

Q: What did the potato chip say to the battery?

A: If you're "Everyready", I'm "Frito-Lay"

They seem to be getting worse so I'll stop now.