ITT, we post hilarious quotes from The Office

[MichaelScott]

not as well as me dwight or 75th

 

[beefcake28]

Dwight Schrute: I.D. badges are long overdue. Security in this office park is a joke. Last year, I came to work with my spud gun in a duffel bag. I sat at my desk all day, with a rifle that shoots potatoes at 60 pounds per square inch. Can you imagine if I was deranged?

 

[MichaelScott]

''Why can't boys play with dolls?..Why does society force us to use urinals when sitting down is far more comfortable? ''
--'Boys and Girls'

 

[75th]

I taught Mike some phrases to help with his interracial relations. You know, things like "fleece it out," "going mach 5," "dinkin flicka."

You know, things us negros say.

 

[beefcake28]

Dwight: OK, do me. Something stereotypical so I can get it really quick.
Pam: OK, I like your food.
Dwight: Outback steakhouse. [Australian accent] I'm Australian, mate!
Michael: Pam, come on. "I like your food." Come on stir the pot. Stir the melting pot, Pam! Let's do it. Let's get ugly. Let's get real.
Pam: OK. If I have to do this, based on stereotypes that are totally untrue, that I do not agree with, you would maybe not be a very good driver.
Dwight: Oh, man, am I a woman?

 

[MichaelScott]

Michael: Ugh...who's ahead in points?
Pam: Well, I think they're even. At various times you gave Jim 10 points, Dwight a gold star and Stanley a thumbs up.

 

[75th]

Michael: Ugh...who's ahead in points?
Pam: Well, I think they're even. At various times you gave Jim 10 points, Dwight a gold star and Stanley a thumbs up.

See if theres a conversion chart in the back.

 

[beefcake28]

Michael: Hey, Pam, how would you, like to be our cheerleader today? You know, some, ah, pigtails? A little, ah, halter top, you could tie that up. And you know, something a little, just, youthful, for a change. Just this once?
Pam: I don't think so Michael. Besides, I can't cheer against my fiance.
Jim: I'll do it. Wear a little flouncey skirt if you want, and...
Michael: Yeah, I bet you would. Just try not to be too gay on the court. And by gay I mean, um, you know, not in a homosexual way at all. I mean the uh, you know, like the bad-at-sports way. I think that goes without saying.

 

[beefcake28]

Michael: Guys, beef! It's what's for dinner! Who wants some man meat?
Dwight: I do! I want some man meat!
Jim: Michael, Dwight would like your man meat.
Michael: Well then my man meat, he shall have. There you go. Deliciousity.
Stanley: [Stanley's fork breaks.] Of course.

 

[MichaelScott]

lol i loved that scene