i'm kinda pissed.

[stilleto]

I took off from work on friday.

Today I came in and found out that on friday, a rather large woman from the accounting department (across the hall from me) started choking on a piece of candy. This other, TINY woman jumped up and tried to do the heimlich maneuver on her, but couldn't get her arm around her. people were screaming for help, and trying to get her to throw herself over a chair or something, but all of our chairs are on wheels. eventually, someone hit her hard enough to dislodge it, which also caused her to vomit all over the accounting department.

She plopped herself down in a chair to recover, but the chair (on wheels) slid out from under her. she's ok now, and in work.


but I friggin' missed the whole thing.

 

[jerkbox]

fark.....that woulda made for some awesome pics

 

[jnevin]

pics

 

[jh1]

Damn.

(LOL)

 

[chewyxrage]

damn

just think you coulda saved her

 

[yonkers weights]

Check the security camera for the replay!!! POST IT!

 

[the_clockwork]

lolololol

that's sick

 

[stilleto]

damn

just think you coulda saved her

yeah. or gotten pics.

 

[jnevin]

LOL @ the thought of someone taking camera phone pics from the doorway as the manatee choked.

 

[alien amp pharm]

I remember being at a high school basketball game and this HUGE man went and came back with about $80 worth of food. Hotdogs, popcorn, candy, 2 drinks. etc etc. and he was by himself.

He tripped over the bleecher seat and smacked it HARD. Food went flying in the air everywhere and he nearly landed on 2 tiny kids a couple rows down.

Me and my 3 buddies could not stop laughing, no matter how hard we tried.
I kinda felt bad, but it was one of those uncontrollable laughs. People were looking at us like we were heartless.

 

[jerkbox]

a rather large woman from the accounting department (across the hall from me) started choking on a piece of candy.

if I had been there, I woulda told her that this was god's way of telling her to stop stuffing her fat face, then laughed a little and said just kidding.

 

[jnevin]

if I had been there, I woulda told her that this was god's way of telling her to stop stuffing her fat face, then laughed a little and said just kidding.

lol

 

[stilleto]

I remember being at a high school basketball game and this HUGE man went and came back with about $80 worth of food. Hotdogs, popcorn, candy, 2 drinks. etc etc. and he was by himself.

He tripped over the bleecher seat and smacked it HARD. Food went flying in the air everywhere and he nearly landed on 2 tiny kids a couple rows down.

Me and my 3 buddies could not stop laughing, no matter how hard we tried.
I kinda felt bad, but it was one of those uncontrollable laughs. People were looking at us like we were heartless.

i hate to admit this





but i'm laughing at the thought.
this woman who choked is just coming back to work after being out for months with that flesh eating virus.

 

[stilleto]

if i believed in god, i'd think it would punish me for this thread.

 

[jnevin]

i hate to admit this





but i'm laughing at the thought.
this woman who choked is just coming back to work after being out for months with that flesh eating virus.

Oh jesus. She eats so much that her body eats itself?

 

[Sub-Zero]

if I had been there, I woulda told her that this was god's way of telling her to stop stuffing her fat face, then laughed a little and said just kidding.

lol i always wanna yell at fat people when i see them get candy or a bunch of cookies or something, but i realize its not my place,

fucking fatties who dont even try

 

[jerkbox]

Oh jesus. She eats so much that her body eats itself?

lol...that's fucked up....


I bet bean bean would hit it

 

[jnevin]

lol...that's fucked up....


I bet bean bean would hit it

As long as the ass isn't too stank.

 

[jerkbox]

lol i always wanna yell at fat people when i see them get candy or a bunch of cookies or something, but i realize its not my place,

fucking fatties who dont even try

if i was a big fat person like jnev, i'd be a total closet eater

 

[jackangel]

if i believed in god, i'd think it would punish me for this thread.

any God that I believe in would high-five me for this thread.

holy lollers

 

[slat1]

The only thing that story is missing is her splitting her pants when the chair fell out from under her.

If I was there I would have picked the candy up.. looked at it.. and said "oh" like I was admiring it and then popped it in my mouth and kept walking.

 

[stilleto]

any God that I believe in would high-five me for this thread.

holy lollers

i like your god then.

 

[jnevin]

if i was a big fat person like jnev, i'd be a total closet eater

LOL

Beerbonging alfredo sauce?

 

[fistfullofsteel]

you have to lose some weight, you almost died. how are your favorite sunglasses that you dropped in the toilet?

 

[stilleto]

you have to lose some weight, you almost died. how are your favorite sunglasses that you dropped in the toilet?

ok. that was me. this wasn't.

but my glasses are good now.

 

[jackangel]

i like your god then.

my god also approves of tongue-kissing as a noted exception to the whole adultery thing.

 

[stilleto]

my god also approves of tongue-kissing as a noted exception to the whole adultery thing.

really? this is awesome! I love tongue-ing!!

 

[jackangel]

really? this is awesome! I love tongue-ing!!

tease

 

[heatherrae]

I took off from work on friday.

Today I came in and found out that on friday, a rather large woman from the accounting department (across the hall from me) started choking on a piece of candy. This other, TINY woman jumped up and tried to do the heimlich maneuver on her, but couldn't get her arm around her. people were screaming for help, and trying to get her to throw herself over a chair or something, but all of our chairs are on wheels. eventually, someone hit her hard enough to dislodge it, which also caused her to vomit all over the accounting department.

She plopped herself down in a chair to recover, but the chair (on wheels) slid out from under her. she's ok now, and in work.


but I friggin' missed the whole thing.

BWA HA HA HA!

When I first started at a new law firm in Cincinnati, one of my secretaries somehow managed to staple my brief to the palm of her other hand. It was one of the BIG staples for more than 30 sheets or so. All the paralegals and secretaries were running around freaking out, as she bled all over my damned brief.

I made her sit down and got my bloody brief off of her palm and she brought me Godiva chocolates the next day.

good fun!

 

[gotmilk]

fat people do not choke on candy. Their throats are too wide.

common people.

 

[ksharp01]

if i believed in god, i'd think it would punish me for this thread.

there are several times a day that I will say or do something that makes me think the say thing....I say "I'm going to hell for that" to many times

I could go to the mall and sit there all day just making fun of people.
Hey, if it makes me feel better about myself...then it should all be good right. lol yeah, I'm terrible

 

[Sub-Zero]

BWA HA HA HA!

When I first started at a new law firm in Cincinnati, one of my secretaries somehow managed to staple my brief to the palm of her other hand. It was one of the BIG staples for more than 30 sheets or so. All the paralegals and secretaries were running around freaking out, as she bled all over my damned brief.

I made her sit down and got my bloody brief off of her palm and she brought me Godiva chocolates the next day.

good fun!

this is precisely why i wear boxers

 

[stilleto]

BWA HA HA HA!

When I first started at a new law firm in Cincinnati, one of my secretaries somehow managed to staple my brief to the palm of her other hand. It was one of the BIG staples for more than 30 sheets or so. All the paralegals and secretaries were running around freaking out, as she bled all over my damned brief.

I made her sit down and got my bloody brief off of her palm and she brought me Godiva chocolates the next day.

good fun!

LOL...

oh, and EWWWW!!

and YUM!

 

[string_bean00]

As long as the ass isn't too stank.

right!