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If you could change one thing - do one thing different

Cardinal Slin

Cardinal Slin

New member
If you could change one thing in your life, go back in time and correct one path you took, or rectify one issue that you feel was wrong - what would it be?

What would you like to change?

Moi: I was pretty much sheltered my whole life and it has kinda made me a quiet, not so extroverted person which people often mistake for being up myself or unsociable.

I am only - after 10 years - fixing this and coming out of the shell! While I do consider myself smart, knowledgable and inteligent, I do feel I could have furthered myself had I been more open and outgoing...

Post up, be honest, I wanna hear your stories
 
Cardinal Slin said:
How fat bro? Has your life changed a lot other than the increase in confidence?
Click to expand...

i have the same amount of confidence iv always had. by the time i realized being fat was bad, or even really what it was, i started to fix the problem, like 8th grade., i didnt know i was disgusting untill around then.

i also would have never gotten a computer untill college
 
SublimeZM said:
i have the same amount of confidence iv always had. by the time i realized being fat was bad, or even really what it was, i started to fix the problem, like 8th grade., i didnt know i was disgusting untill around then.

i also would have never gotten a computer untill college
Click to expand...

I don't know if being fat is something that is truly bad. I believe this depends on the percentage of fat the body holds and how healthy that person is. Some fat/overweight people are much healthier than average sized people. I also think it comes down to the individual.

When I start increasing muscle and I notice more people looking at me, shallow or not, my confidence increases. I imagine the same goes for someone who loses body fat.

Am glad you lost the weight and it made ya happy mate.
 
Cardinal Slin said:
I don't know if being fat is something that is truly bad. I believe this depends on the percentage of fat the body holds and how healthy that person is. Some fat/overweight people are much healthier than average sized people. I also think it comes down to the individual.

When I start increasing muscle and I notice more people looking at me, shallow or not, my confidence increases. I imagine the same goes for someone who loses body fat.

Am glad you lost the weight and it made ya happy mate.
Click to expand...

im not so sure it made me happy or unhappy. the only time iv ever noticed people checking me out is when i was on a segway tour, i felt like a rockstar all the babes lookin at me.

what means are you taking to be more extroverted?
 
Long story but it has to do with a girl.
 
not got married
 
I'd go back to every one of my x-girlfriends and apoligize for not being the way that I should have been for them.

If you can consider that "going back".
 
I've done many terribly regrettable things, too many. Most if not all drug/alcohol related. I'm not sure if this can qualify for the thread, but I wish that somehow I could have done somethig to get diagnosed with ADD at a young age, say 10-12. It wasn't a "known" problem back in the 60's and 70's, at least not by that name, but I wish someone would have seen the sympotoms and had put me on a path to get help. The anxiety I cured with alcohol, the cocain and speed cleared my thinking, it made for a bad combination, but they did make me feel "normal". As an adult, I wish I would have seen the destruction that i was doing to myself and my family, ADD or no ADD, I wish I had chosen not to keep using.
 
txbondsman said:
I've done many terribly regrettable things, too many. Most if not all drug/alcohol related. I'm not sure if this can qualify for the thread, but I wish that somehow I could have done somethig to get diagnosed with ADD at a young age, say 10-12. It wasn't a "known" problem back in the 60's and 70's, at least not by that name, but I wish someone would have seen the sympotoms and had put me on a path to get help. The anxiety I cured with alcohol, the cocain and speed cleared my thinking, it made for a bad combination, but they did make me feel "normal". As an adult, I wish I would have seen the destruction that i was doing to myself and my family, ADD or no ADD, I wish I had chosen not to keep using.
Click to expand...

Well bro...

You have done them, you realise they are wrong and you wish you could go back and fix them... I think 95% of going back is complete - physically going back is impossible now but you have learned, regretted and for sure put that in to 'the different you' for lack of better words.

You realised the destruction and am sure (would hope LOL) having taken a stand against it.

PROPS
 
Two things - when I was a kid I would have told my parents what a shitty job they were doing in totally screwing me up.

I would go back and get decent grades in university. It closed a lot of doors now that I really wish were open and I can't invest 3 years to change it now.
 
Cardinal Slin said:
Well bro...

You have done them, you realise they are wrong and you wish you could go back and fix them... I think 95% of going back is complete - physically going back is impossible now but you have learned, regretted and for sure put that in to 'the different you' for lack of better words.

You realised the destruction and am sure (would hope LOL) having taken a stand against it.

PROPS
Click to expand...

OH CS, I do. I do....
Most of the "fixing" I do by staying sober, that's payoff for my family. I have 8 years clean/sober now. I still try and "fix" some of the past by helping others that would like to get/stay sober, it's the least I can do. I asked N2 if I could start an EF substance abuse group, luckily he said yes and it's been a sucess I think. That's the stand that I take on a daily basis...
 
ponyfitness said:
I would go back and get decent grades in university. It closed a lot of doors now that I really wish were open and I can't invest 3 years to change it now.
Click to expand...

^^ yes, me 2
 
I was addicted to valium/xanax, weed, ghb and alcohol for a long time. Luckily 4 years ago I kicked it all. I just woke up one day and said fuck it, life has so much more to offer than this and hardly touched anything ever again. Ghb and valiums/xanax not used for more than 5 years at least. Weed - once or twice a year so it's not big deal and alcohol maybe on the weekends. It was damn hard in the beginning. Sleeping only an hour a night, sometimes not at all but as time goes by it gets easier.

All the best bro and am glad you are an elite mentor!

Wishing you and the Group all the success in 2009 (not being cheesy) but sincerely meaning it.
 
BNG said:
Just changing one thing? I'd still feel guilty later for only doing one.
Click to expand...

I did not get bad grades but could have definitely done better.

I guess my regret was just being the loser only caring about drugs and partying and not really making any friends. Now being much older I could have a lot more good people around me had I done the right thing back then rather than just using people.

Live and Learn I guess, it's the life journey.
 
is that, you would have never hired any attorney OR you would have never hired an unmarried attorney. Clear yourself, one word or less...
 
Cardinal Slin said:
I was addicted to valium/xanax, weed, ghb and alcohol for a long time. Luckily 4 years ago I kicked it all. I just woke up one day and said fuck it, life has so much more to offer than this and hardly touched anything ever again. Ghb and valiums/xanax not used for more than 5 years at least.
Click to expand...

My Dr's have written me open scripts for Xanax, Valium, Lorazepam, Rohypnol, and several other things. Some of them are to combat side effects from other meds that I must take and some of them are to help with medical conditions. All are "as needed" though. All are dirt cheap here too.

Recently I got to thinking that I was addicted so I've taken the last 10 days and not used any of them. Fairly happy with it.

Mind if I shoot you a PM about your experiences?

(feel free to delete this post if it is too personal)
 
txbondsman said:
is that, you would have never hired any attorney OR you would have never hired an unmarried attorney. Clear yourself, one word or less...
Click to expand...

I've been represented by unmarried attorneys.

That's not the direction I was headed.

I simply would never have hired an attorney. I would have spent my money elsewhere and achieved a much more desirable result for anyone/everyone involved in my life.
 
b fold the truth said:
My Dr's have written me open scripts for Xanax, Valium, Lorazepam, Rohypnol, and several other things. Some of them are to combat side effects from other meds that I must take and some of them are to help with medical conditions. All are "as needed" though. All are dirt cheap here too.

Recently I got to thinking that I was addicted so I've taken the last 10 days and not used any of them. Fairly happy with it.

Mind if I shoot you a PM about your experiences?

(feel free to delete this post if it is too personal)
Click to expand...

what are all the drugs for?
 
b fold the truth said:
My Dr's have written me open scripts for Xanax, Valium, Lorazepam, Rohypnol, and several other things. Some of them are to combat side effects from other meds that I must take and some of them are to help with medical conditions. All are "as needed" though. All are dirt cheap here too.

Recently I got to thinking that I was addicted so I've taken the last 10 days and not used any of them. Fairly happy with it.

Mind if I shoot you a PM about your experiences?

(feel free to delete this post if it is too personal)
Click to expand...

Absolutely you can send me a PM mate.

One thing that studies have not really been done on is when doctors give you one drug to combat the sides of another. It can be dangerous but usually is not that bad.

I know someone who is on 7 drugs to overcome the sides of the first, second, third drugs they are on.... God damn hate doctors sometimes.
 
SublimeZM said:
what are all the drugs for?
Click to expand...

I have severe ulcerative colitis. A couple of years ago I was taking 16 diff meds a day. Most of them to combat the effects of another.

The high dose of cortisone that I've taken regularly gave me severe high blood pressure, insomnia, paranoia, etc... Coming off of it gave me arthritis, kidneys nearly shut down, etc...

A lot of benzos can be used during a flare up of my disease..to help settle my body down a little. I've found that most things didn't work that well (valium and lorazapam didn't) but the others work really well "when needed".
 
there's lots of stuff that i'd love to have a "do-over" on. . .only so i could try a little harder the 2nd time. . .but, i'd be afraid to "change" anything as that would most likely have an effect on where i am right now. . .which is exactly where i am supposed to be. . .well. . .that's not exactly true. . .looking back. . .at some of the dumb shit i did, and half-hearted attempts that i made, it's a fucking miracle that i am "here" at all, let alone with all the blessings that i have received in my life. . .i have more than i expected, and more than i deserve. . .and i could live like this forever. . .but if the good Lord needs me tomorrow. . .it's ok. . .'cause i already won :)
 
b fold the truth said:
I have severe ulcerative colitis. A couple of years ago I was taking 16 diff meds a day. Most of them to combat the effects of another.

The high dose of cortisone that I've taken regularly gave me severe high blood pressure, insomnia, paranoia, etc... Coming off of it gave me arthritis, kidneys nearly shut down, etc...

A lot of benzos can be used during a flare up of my disease..to help settle my body down a little. I've found that most things didn't work that well (valium and lorazapam didn't) but the others work really well "when needed".
Click to expand...

wow bro that sounds like a rough battle. does it fuck with your training real bad?
 
digimon7068 said:
there's lots of stuff that i'd love to have a "do-over" on. . .only so i could try a little harder the 2nd time. . .but, i'd be afraid to "change" anything as that would most likely have an effect on where i am right now. . .which is exactly where i am supposed to be. . .well. . .that's not exactly true. . .looking back. . .at some of the dumb shit i did, and half-hearted attempts that i made, it's a fucking miracle that i am "here" at all, let alone with all the blessings that i have received in my life. . .i have more than i expected, and more than i deserve. . .and i could live like this forever. . .but if the good Lord needs me tomorrow. . .it's ok. . .'cause i already won :)
Click to expand...

and that sounds like you're a fighter!
 
SublimeZM said:
wow bro that sounds like a rough battle. does it fuck with your training real bad?
Click to expand...

Having diarrhea 6-12x a day, most every day, for sure does.

I went from being 280+ lbs to force feeding, taking HRT, and doing everything I can and was still under 240 lbs bodyweight. I dropped 200 lbs on my deadlift and 100 lbs on my overhead and never missed a workout. Chronic arthritis in every bone (made sleep impossible) as well.

But I'm having fun...
 
b fold the truth said:
Having diarrhea 6-12x a day, most every day, for sure does.

I went from being 280+ lbs to force feeding, taking HRT, and doing everything I can and was still under 240 lbs bodyweight. I dropped 200 lbs on my deadlift and 100 lbs on my overhead and never missed a workout. Chronic arthritis in every bone (made sleep impossible) as well.

But I'm having fun...
Click to expand...

Hey mate - so sorry to hear this :(

Wish you all the best in recovering.

Is there anything that can be done?
 
Cardinal Slin said:
Hey mate - so sorry to hear this :(

Wish you all the best in recovering.

Is there anything that can be done?
Click to expand...

That's where all my meds have came in. I came off everything but one main med for a long while till I had more set-backs and now I've started the HRT and benzos when needed. Trying to get as low dose and as far away from them as possible though.

Long road, one to learn from, and my bodyweight is around 290 at the moment. I've been 291 clean this year as well.
 
txbondsman said:
OH CS, I do. I do....
Most of the "fixing" I do by staying sober, that's payoff for my family. I have 8 years clean/sober now. I still try and "fix" some of the past by helping others that would like to get/stay sober, it's the least I can do. I asked N2 if I could start an EF substance abuse group, luckily he said yes and it's been a sucess I think. That's the stand that I take on a daily basis...
Click to expand...

Not sure if I've said this before, but....
Everything I did then, good or bad, made me who I am today.
We will not regret the past, nor shall we close the door on it.
 
i guess i could of changed something before my wife left i dont know what. but if could do one thing different it would be something to keep her in my life. i dont even know if that was ever possible.
 
When I was 20 I was deployed overseas and started lifting weights. I quit for all the usual (wrong) reasons. Took 20 years before I got serious.
If I would have kept that up, I'd be a monster today.
 
ricco561 said:
Not sure if I've said this before, but....
Everything I did then, good or bad, made me who I am today.
We will not regret the past, nor shall we close the door on it.
Click to expand...


You are right man...completely.

I'd like to go back and apologize to my ex girlfriends because I wasn't a good boyfriend to them, but the situations with them led me to be a good man for my wife.

I'd apologize to each of them today if I knew how to get in touch with them.
 
b fold the truth said:
You are right man...completely.

I'd like to go back and apologize to my ex girlfriends because I wasn't a good boyfriend to them, but the situations with them led me to be a good man for my wife.

I'd apologize to each of them today if I knew how to get in touch with them.
Click to expand...

amen brother. . .i'm right there with you. . .i have a clarity now that i didn't have before. . .luckily, i still exchange christmas cards with most of my old acquaintances. . .and i've apologized to most of them too. . .
 
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