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I Honestly Try....

H_T_

H_T_

Da Pope
Platinum
to be mature, but find it hard to resist making fart noises when my gf or someone else bends over or get behind her and pretend to hump her doggiestyle. maybe grab her head and make slurping noises. i don't think i'll ever grow out of this. but it's ok, cuz i think it's funny, and that's all that matters....
 
and i also will grab anything that seems fitting like a summer squash or cricket bat and hold it near my crotch and hop around with a goofy look on my face. if you get close, i'll fake hump you....
 
You must be a joy to live with.


I have yet to meet a man who does not giggle like a lil school girl when it comes to the subject of farting. It must tickle you men, cuz you'd think it was the funniest thing going on when it happens to you.

My husband thinks it funny to fart then throw the covers over my head. You'd think he'd get the idea I do not find any humor in that lil stunt. Nope, he'll do it everytime!

And they say we are difficult to live with...
 
Tytan said:
She secretly hates it....That`s proly why you do it huh?
Click to expand...
she's kind of a prissy girly girl. never swears or spits. gets mad when i ask her to give me a blowjob.....wtf?
 
vixensghost said:
You must be a joy to live with.


I have yet to meet a man who does not giggle like a lil school girl when it comes to the subject of farting. It must tickle you men, cuz you'd think it was the funniest thing going on when it happens to you.

My husband thinks it funny to fart then throw the covers over my head. You'd think he'd get the idea I do not find any humor in that lil stunt. Nope, he'll do it everytime!

And they say we are difficult to live with...
Click to expand...

My husband wouldn't even poop when he thought I was near the door. LOL We will be married one year soon and he just got comfortable enough to fart in front of me. Me?.... I been breaking wind from the word GO...

'Course, I don't EVER ask anyone to "pull my finger". :rolleyes:
 
lol@ Kini.

I'd give a lot if the "good ole" days of first dating were here again. My hubby would turn red if he slipped a burp out in front of me. Now, he burps and blows the burp my way so I can smell it. Where did my man with manners go?
 
BIKINIMOM said:
My husband wouldn't even poop when he thought I was near the door. LOL We will be married one year soon and he just got comfortable enough to fart in front of me. Me?.... I been breaking wind from the word GO...

'Course, I don't EVER ask anyone to "pull my finger". :rolleyes:
Click to expand...
:lmao:

In my house it's the other way around, I'm the one who locks up and my husband has used farts to punctuate conversation (and always has) :rolleyes:

And that's after 13+ years together. The man has actually bribed me to fart noisily and I just can't bring myself to do it (course I'm 42 and blush at the drop of a hat too, so ...)
 
LOL

Sorry, but unlike guys who think that it's funny to force farts, etc I can't help it. My GI tract is fugged up, so it's a very UNsexy problem. I honestly feel sorry for my husband sometimes... But then I think to myself, "Hey, he is a guy so this must be somewhat pleasurable." :lmao:
 
BIKINIMOM said:
LOL

Sorry, but unlike guys who think that it's funny to force farts, etc I can't help it. My GI tract is fugged up, so it's a very UNsexy problem. I honestly feel sorry for my husband sometimes... But then I think to myself, "Hey, he is a guy so this must be somewhat pleasurable." :lmao:
Click to expand...


Dear God, are you one of those people who get the walking farts in a grocery store? lol

There was an old man in line ahead of me in the grocery store a few weeks back. Poor old guy was walking and tooting up a storm. It became so funny I could NOT contain my laughing. I was getting dirty looks from the old fart. God, I hate those uncontollable laughs, no matter how hard you try and stop, it gets worse, I had tears from laughing so hard.His dirty looks were making me laugh so damn hard.
 
vixensghost said:
Dear God, are you one of those people who get the walking farts in a grocery store? lol

There was an old man in line ahead of me in the grocery store a few weeks back. Poor old guy was walking and tooting up a storm. It became so funny I could NOT contain my laughing. I was getting dirty looks from the old fart. God, I hate those uncontollable laughs, no matter how hard you try and stop, it gets worse, I had tears from laughing so hard.His dirty looks were making me laugh so damn hard.
Click to expand...

Hehehehehee

For me walking farts = public disaster waiting to happen. :worried:

When I get little toots, 9 out of 10 times there had better be a facility REAL closeby. It's not pretty. I get pale, break out in a sweat (you know where you get the beads of perspiration about your upper lip), and if I don't go like NOW.... goodness knows what comes next. Actually I do know and it ain't fun or pretty. :(
 
Farts are the funniest ... But it drives my girl crazy.. But pulling her head under the covers , NO CAN DO.. She would cut my ass off, she would cut me from end to end. Crazy bitch can't help lovennn her.
 
BIKINIMOM said:
Hehehehehee

For me walking farts = public disaster waiting to happen. :worried:

When I get little toots, 9 out of 10 times there had better be a facility REAL closeby. It's not pretty. I get pale, break out in a sweat (you know where you get the beads of perspiration about your upper lip), and if I don't go like NOW.... goodness knows what comes next. Actually I do know and it ain't fun or pretty. :(
Click to expand...


Not good. :heart:
 
asafiddle said:
She probably hates when you do things like that but feels bad telling you to stop so she lets you do it...
Click to expand...
she lol's big time when my rottie busts a creeping death on everyone.....
 
vixensghost said:
You must be a joy to live with.


I have yet to meet a man who does not giggle like a lil school girl when it comes to the subject of farting. It must tickle you men, cuz you'd think it was the funniest thing going on when it happens to you.

My husband thinks it funny to fart then throw the covers over my head. You'd think he'd get the idea I do not find any humor in that lil stunt. Nope, he'll do it everytime!

And they say we are difficult to live with...
Click to expand...


My Dad is 75 and turns blue with laughter when he farts. And do you notice, the smellier the fart, the louder the laughter
God created farts to amuse men
 
fart = vibration of your O-ring. i just wanted this thread to be included when someone searches the fabled O-ring threads....
 
hstern said:
lol @ fake humping
Click to expand...
oh yeah. if someone asks for a drink, like a bottle of water, that water bottle immediately becomes an extension of my own penis and i wield it like a light saber....
 
dutch oven=real emotional love

oh it's true, it's damn true!! enjoy it woman!!


vixensghost said:
You must be a joy to live with.


I have yet to meet a man who does not giggle like a lil school girl when it comes to the subject of farting. It must tickle you men, cuz you'd think it was the funniest thing going on when it happens to you.

My husband thinks it funny to fart then throw the covers over my head. You'd think he'd get the idea I do not find any humor in that lil stunt. Nope, he'll do it everytime!

And they say we are difficult to live with...
Click to expand...
 
wait... women don't find these things funny?

I do the doggystyle thing to everything that bends over
 
BIKINIMOM said:
LOL

Sorry, but unlike guys who think that it's funny to force farts, etc I can't help it. My GI tract is fugged up, so it's a very UNsexy problem. I honestly feel sorry for my husband sometimes... But then I think to myself, "Hey, he is a guy so this must be somewhat pleasurable." :lmao:
Click to expand...


now we know why you don't like anal sex........you have shame issues with that region due to your condition. Relax.....let ole grumps hit the backdoor!!!.... :qt:
 
you can't say the words 69 or 6 inch or foot long without me laughing like a hyena....
 
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