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I failed you BBF

F

fyxgel2

Banned
Yesterday you challenged me to ask out 3 girls today...

And I went the whole day, without asking out one.
I dont feel comfortable at all doing it. I dunno, I get the feeling that I would rather talk to the girl a little bit, and get to know her (in more than just a small introduction) before asking her out. I would just feel a lot more comfortable if I did that. And I dont see how that can happen as quickly as in one day.

I suppose there may have been a few really awkward opportunities, but besides that there was no opportunity. And I wasnt really in the mood to make myself go to the mall, or go clubbing, to 'mack' on chicks.
 
Manny, yeah that book would be a good read for him. A friend of mine bought it and I skimmed it. Pretty basic info that most guys should know already, but some don't.

Fyxgel, what are we going to do with you young bro? Well you better get back on it tomarrow. Find ONE girl, she can be average looking who you can start a conversation with (don't go clubbing you are not ready for one of those meat markets yet) at the gym or the mall or something, then after talkign to her a few minutes tell her you would like to take her to a movie some time and would like to get her number. Don't ask her, tell her. Odds are you will get the "Oh I have a boyfriend" or "Well I am really busy right now" line, but don't sweat it. This is just for practice we aren't keeping score yet. But go in expecting a yes. Tell youself that she will say yes, because you are sexy and she is attracted to you. If she says no, don't worry no loss, she was just a girl you didn't even know.

You have your task.
 
Bro, its ok to get to know a girl first. But, you are such a nice polite guy, you will be in the friend category in 5 min.

So, I would talk to a girl like a confident man. And, if the slightest opportunity opens to ask her to do something take it. It doesn't have to be an official date. ex If your talking to a girl and its going ok. Then, say "Lets get a quick cup of coffee" and start getting up to go. (assume she wants to go, don't ask) Don't think of it as a date think of "gettin to know her"

now you are getting both things you want. And, you don't have to worry about rejection.
 
awittyusername said:
Bro, its ok to get to know a girl first. But, you are such a nice polite guy, you will be in the friend category in 5 min.

So, I would talk to a girl like a confident man. And, if the slightest opportunity opens to ask her to do something take it. It doesn't have to be an official date. ex If your talking to a girl and its going ok. Then, say "Lets get a quick cup of coffee" and start getting up to go. (assume she wants to go, don't ask) Don't think of it as a date think of "gettin to know her"

now you are getting both things you want. And, you don't have to worry about rejection.
Click to expand...

Good plan, especially at the mall. If you get the boyfriend line, just go find another one. The mall is always full of single chicks. You can take her to whatever coffee shop is at your mall to talk to her and get to know her better, and as he said, don't ask her. Tell her.
 
Its ok that you failed today. My fuck buddy got sick, and I have others I can call, but don't feel like going through the trouble. I'll wait until tomarrow.

I better be careful here though... this chick might be trying to play a game to get me to like her. She is a great lay, and knows it sicne I fucked her so many times Friday. We agreed last night to fuck almost every day, but that we would cut down on partners since we both had a regular and would tell the otehr one if we fucked someone else between sessions. She might be pulling back now to make me want her, and to see what I will do. Going to play my cards very carefully. However, I will also give her the benefit of the doubt that she really did get sick today. She has been pretty straightforward and cool with me so far. Plus she went through great efforts to get my attention (she asked me out for a few drinks after we exchanged numbers, then bought ALL of my drinks friday night).
 
BodyByFinaplix said:
Good plan, especially at the mall. If you get the boyfriend line, just go find another one. The mall is always full of single chicks. You can take her to whatever coffee shop is at your mall to talk to her and get to know her better, and as he said, don't ask her. Tell her.
Click to expand...

flxygel,

It looks like everyone is again giving you the same advice. Don't ask her if she want to do something. Tell her or assume she wants to go. The mall is a great place to get chicks when your 18-19. I wish I was your age everytime I goto the mall and see those young girls with their tight young bodies. I miss the way there young bodies smell.... Oh, sorry I got distracted.

Hey bro, do you have a good friend. (that won't cockblock you) I was lucky I had a great friend. It was easier to meet girls if you have a good friend, bc girls usually travel in packs. And, its more casual. The important thing to remember. It is always the ladies choice. So, never fight over a girl w/your friend. And, either of you should be willing to take the fat chick. (so your bro can score.)
 
Heres also a little trick, albeit a little riskier but it shifts the emphasis off of you and onto the situation:
Go to a mall with a movie theater and hang around the ticket counter and make a note of what time it is and match it with whatever movie is about to start, hopefully one halfway decent youd like to see. Find a girl and go up to her and say "I was meeting someone here and they had to bail on me for XYZ reason and I really hate seeing a movie alone, would you mind filling in?" Tell her she would get a free movie (matinee price, of course). If she agrees, then youve bought time during the movie to guage her interest and think about where you want to take her afterwards, probably the food court, say you were hungry after that movie or something. Boom, insta-date.
If she turns the offer down, go to the next girl, if you keep getting turned down with this tactic you are still gaining EXPERIENCE interacting with chicks.
 
isnt telling her that you want to do something, without 'asking her' a little rude? its like you are trying to push it on her.

And also...
Don't you guys think its a little weird, like trying to get to know some RANDOM chick at the mall? Like shouldnt you meet your women, at your job, at your church, through some friends, or through some club, or activity or something?

Why do I feel so weird, approaching, talking to, and getting to know people that I meet just this one time out in some random place?
(I feel like I'm pushing something that wasnt meant to be, or something like that)
 
fyxgel2 said:
But dont you guys think its a little weird, like trying to get to know some random chick at the mall?
Click to expand...

yes, unless you're 16. Do the opposite of whatever you're doing now, and report back when you get herpes and FULL BLOWN AIDS
 
fyxgel2 said:
isnt telling her that you want to do something, without 'asking her' a little rude? its like you are trying to push it on her.

But dont you guys think its a little weird, like trying to get to know some random chick at the mall? Like shouldnt you meet your women, at your job, at your church, through some friends, or through some club, or activity or something?

Why do I feel so weird, approaching, talking to, and getting to know people that I meet just this one time out in some random place?
(I feel like I'm pushing something that wasnt meant to be, or something like that)
Click to expand...
Because you dont want to get out of your comfort zone and learn new things. Once you get a little crazy and do the things weve suggested, then when you are in your own element, like job, church, through friends, club, activity, then you will feel very comfortable dealing with women because of the UNcomfortable things you did that we suggested in order to jumpstart your learning.
Heres another analogy. If you bust your ass and do wind sprints for a few weeks, then next time you step on a treadmill to jog a few miles seems really easy since you went way out of your comfort zone with the wind sprints. Same thing with women.
Class dismissed.
 
superdave said:
Heres also a little trick, albeit a little riskier but it shifts the emphasis off of you and onto the situation:
Go to a mall with a movie theater and hang around the ticket counter and make a note of what time it is and match it with whatever movie is about to start, hopefully one halfway decent youd like to see. Find a girl and go up to her and say "I was meeting someone here and they had to bail on me for XYZ reason and I really hate seeing a movie alone, would you mind filling in?" Tell her she would get a free movie (matinee price, of course). If she agrees, then youve bought time during the movie to guage her interest and think about where you want to take her afterwards, probably the food court, say you were hungry after that movie or something. Boom, insta-date.
If she turns the offer down, go to the next girl, if you keep getting turned down with this tactic you are still gaining EXPERIENCE interacting with chicks.
Click to expand...

Solid avice. Damn I wish I was 18 or 19. LoL
 
Anywho dispite being old, I do nail an occasional 18 or 19 year old, btu usually my cut off is 21, I try to avoid girls younger than this.
 
Close but no cigar. Ok, well at least we know you like women. Follow the advice here. Superdave's method is golden at your age.
 
fyxgel2 said:
25? I have no idea. crap, i just hijacked my own thread. okay back to business, so... women are cool...
Click to expand...
Im 30 in november, so whatever I tell you has been put to the test and isnt bullshit theory, same with BBF.
 
superdave said:
Because you dont want to get out of your comfort zone and learn new things. Once you get a little crazy and do the things weve suggested, then when you are in your own element, like job, church, through friends, club, activity, then you will feel very comfortable dealing with women because of the UNcomfortable things you did that we suggested in order to jumpstart your learning.
Heres another analogy. If you bust your ass and do wind sprints for a few weeks, then next time you step on a treadmill to jog a few miles seems really easy since you went way out of your comfort zone with the wind sprints. Same thing with women.
Class dismissed.
Click to expand...

hmmm.. interesting analogy, i like your teaching style.

I guess I can see some validity to what you are saying. although I would still have to say that its probably more efficient to get to know girls, at some similar function that you are in, because that already means that you have something in common.

but heh, for someone like me who doesnt attend any functions, maybe I will have to go public, and get used to the wind sprints.
 
If I could spend a day with you, I could show you the exact attitude you need to have. It's fun too. It's all about being downright cocky to the point where you're a borderline arrogant prick, if you didn't have a sense of humor along with it.

Check out "double your dating" by david deangelo (sp)...you can find it on most file sharing programs. This is a good start.

You need to start acting like the alpha male, as in YOU are the prize and the girl is lucky to be in your presence. I disagree with "taking them out" to the movies and such as some here are suggesting...don't buy them a thing. You will only appear submissive if you do this and will quickly become a "friend," if anything.
 
awittyusername:
Bro, its ok to get to know a girl first. But, you are such a nice polite guy, you will be in the friend category in 5 min
Click to expand...

lol, this is the reason why I am still considering the advice of asking out women right away, instead of getting to know them first.

Infact, this may even be the only way that I will succeed at asking a girl out.


AND FOLKS:
yes I have read that 'double your dating' thing. A lot of it seems like the same advice I've seen on other web sites about picking up women.

I am okay with some of their tactics, as long as I'm not doing anything thats dishonest.

So therefore superdave, your movie idea is a good one, and I may try it, except I probably wont lie and say that 'someone bailed' but I'd rather say something like, hey, "I was gonna go see this movie, but I'd prefer not to see it alone. wanna come in with me?"
yea, maybe it doesnt sound 'as' good, but it still could work.
 
fyxgel2 said:
"I was gonna go see this movie, but I'd prefer not to see it alone. wanna come in with me?"
yea, maybe it doesnt sound 'as' good, but it still could work.
Click to expand...

Argh...no. That's pretty much the attitude you should NOT present.
 
Debaser said:
Argh...no. That's pretty much the attitude you should NOT present.
Click to expand...

well then i guess i cant use superdave's pickup strategy then, since it involves a little bit of dishonesty in order to be successful. :(
 
fyxgel2 said:
well then i guess i cant use superdave's pickup strategy then, since it involves a little bit of dishonesty in order to be successful. :(
Click to expand...
There is such a thing as Irrelevant Information that you are withholding when you are telling the girl you want to see a movie but someone bailed. Its irrelevant if the truth is not told in this situation and she wont be the wiser. Its simply a means to an end.
 
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