How to handle a controlled delivery?

[drveejay11]

Another sugestion... when they deliver the package... open the door wearing only a pink feathered boa, high heals, and your girlfriend's thong and bra. Then, as the Fed disguised as a Postman stands there a moment looking a bit shocked, give him a wicked grin, lick your lips and say, "Hi, handsome. Are you really here to deliver?" Emphasize the "deliver" with a little pelvic thrust.

Then, when he asks you to sign for the package, start to sign... but then stop. Study the package for a moment... looking ever increasingly concerned - then shout out, "That's not the Twin Torpedos!" Start walking around in circles, yank at your hair - throw his clip board. Keep repeating, "I've been waiting for weeks for the Twin Torpedos. Weeks" "What am I going to do? The Tower of Power is broken. Besides I can't find batteries for it anymore. They only make those kind in Japan."

Then...

Stop as the realization sets in. Look deep into the Fed/postman's eyes and say, "Do you want me to sign for your package?" with an ever growing lascivious grin spreading across your lips.

At this point he probably will just bob his head up and down. He jsut wants to cuff you and get-the-f-ck-out and take a shower.

Say to him (while rubbing your crotch):

"I'll sign for it if you come inside and show me how you DELIVER! I want you to make my Tower of Power quiver!"

With luck... the Feds will leave with the package and not bother you in the future.

 

[AAP]

How seriously do we have to worry about getting busted, in general? I just assumed that the cops wouldn't really bother casual users. Am I being willfully naive about that? Does it happen more often than you would think? Does it happen to someone who does a cyce once or twice a year, or just to someone who buys in seriously bulk and then resells?

I would like this answered too.

 

[plethos]

How seriously do we have to worry about getting busted, in general? I just assumed that the cops wouldn't really bother casual users. Am I being willfully naive about that? Does it happen more often than you would think? Does it happen to someone who does a cyce once or twice a year, or just to someone who buys in seriously bulk and then resells?

I'd assume more than people think. Some people seem to want to think it is a low possibility because it makes them sleep better. But if you're an end user all that needs to happen is you getting your stuff seized and it being sent to your local police station with a phone call or your source getting busted and all your info or pending package there for the cops to see... I wrote the story of my bust on the legal forum so others could learn from it, maybe I'll end up posting it in the anabolic forum too later. Here it is:

http://boards.elitefitness.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=235517

 

[wartime100]

The odds depend most on where you live and how busy the authorities are. Check out this post from Steroidology written by Biggieswolls:
Ok, heres the situation. I had a controlled delivery done on me in Ohio. Not only did they do surveillance on the house the night before the controlled delivery, but they even came back to delivery the package 3 times that day because I was sleeping. Roughly 20 agents from 5 different law enforcement agencies were present and guess what was in the package? 200 zambons. Wow, now thats some huge weight. hahahahaha. C'mon, gimme a break.

Now they had a search warrant for the property, but it was only valid once the package was accepted and clear possession of it was taken by me. I was told that if I did not accept the package, that the search warrant would not have been valid. So please explain to me how that is not a conditional search warrant.

I hate it when people post false info that could possibly mean jail time for whomever took it as gospel.


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[growinpete]

don't let them in and return to sender...you don't say or know anythign

 

[plethos]

don't let them in and return to sender...you don't say or know anythign

No need for any of that if you refuse the package.

 

[psychedout]

Agree ask to speak to an attorney before you discuss ANYTHING. Remember they can legally lie to you!

Yup.

 

[geoboy]

The odds depend most on where you live and how busy the authorities are. Check out this post from Steroidology written by Biggieswolls:
Ok, heres the situation. I had a controlled delivery done on me in Ohio. Not only did they do surveillance on the house the night before the controlled delivery, but they even came back to delivery the package 3 times that day because I was sleeping. Roughly 20 agents from 5 different law enforcement agencies were present and guess what was in the package? 200 zambons. Wow, now thats some huge weight. hahahahaha. C'mon, gimme a break.

Now they had a search warrant for the property, but it was only valid once the package was accepted and clear possession of it was taken by me. I was told that if I did not accept the package, that the search warrant would not have been valid. So please explain to me how that is not a conditional search warrant.

I hate it when people post false info that could possibly mean jail time for whomever took it as gospel.


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Whats the false info? did you accept the package, or did you refuse it and they still executed the warrant?

 

[boss]

I just cleaned house. I am kinda expecting a controlled delivery. Whats the best way to handle this. Saying you see it coming, and you know the guys knocking on your door are cops.

bro if you are refering to the latest bust that happened, you will NOT be getting a controlled delivery. dont ask me just trust me. you will be ok and the rest of the people can relax, he has taken steps to ensure this. just keep cool and get some sleep

 

[Corleone]

OK, I've had two controlled deliveries in my time. I was smart enough to avoid one, dumb enough to fall for the other.

Here's what you do.

When they try to deliver it, you tell them that you've been getting wierd mail and you do not want the package, tell them you're not expecting anything and to return it to sender. Enough said, that's it. Just act honest to the disguised cop and they won't be able to do shit about it.

They will not be able to search you legally. Warrants for most controlled deliveries are conditional and they have to have evidence to be able to bust in your house. A package in your name is not enough to justify a warrant, but a judge will sign it on the condition that you accept that package.

Do not let them trick you into handling the package or any of that. When he delivers it ask him who it is from and tell him NO.