How did Noah fit all the animals into the ark? Serious question...

[Big Brother Val]

I figured it out. Noah, that smart bastard, must have also taken his avant guarde genome equipment. PBluescript vector creator, Polymerase chain reaction machine, PCR enzyme hosts with primers, subsequent bacteria for the termination enzymes, a mammalian expression kit and finally his pPCR-Script Amp plasmids.

God than send our hero the new DNA blueprints, out to the arc using the Beta-Dove e-mail system ([email protected]). That way he could take genetic copies of the said animals, and even those that didn't evolve yet, and later on with the help of Jebus (Jesus's microbiologist brother) he could use the fancy equipment and throw together some very dandy copies. Ah that Noah, such the clever rascal.

Aha... you're CLOSE... but you can't use the term "evolve" in your theory. Because remember, if you believe in God, you can't believe in "evolving", correct?

So he had to take them ALL. And somehow, the bears and tigers and lions didn't eat him.

And I'm not sure if all the water was salt water, or fresh water... because fresh water fish can't live in salt water... so maybe Noah had a big ass aquarium on the ship too.

I'm not really sure.

I haven't seen anyone who believes this post yet. I really am looking for answers to this. It's not meant to be bullshit... but when you sit and think about it... that's exactly what it sounds like, right?

And yet we cannot be related to primates, no matter what, because THAT is something that couldn't happen over millions of years?

 

[Mad4Iron]

BBV;I aint gonna tell you aout religion and God.Just My Opinion.Don't fuck no one over,don't hurt anyone and we'll be sitting drinking margaritas and smoking some great kine bud getting blow jobs from gorgeous broads that make great breakfasts.

If my dog aint allowed fuck it I'll burn with the whores,food can't be all that bad

Mad

 

[XBiker]

Aha... you're CLOSE... but you can't use the term "evolve" in your theory. Because remember, if you believe in God, you can't believe in "evolving", correct?

So he had to take them ALL. And somehow, the bears and tigers and lions didn't eat him.

And I'm not sure if all the water was salt water, or fresh water... because fresh water fish can't live in salt water... so maybe Noah had a big ass aquarium on the ship too.

I'm not really sure.

I haven't seen anyone who believes this post yet. I really am looking for answers to this. It's not meant to be bullshit... but when you sit and think about it... that's exactly what it sounds like, right?

And yet we cannot be related to primates, no matter what, because THAT is something that couldn't happen over millions of years?

Not complete true. There are many species that are happy as a bug in a rug in brackish water. There are many stories of sharks swimming up in to fresh water rivers to feed.

It seems more of a tale of "fuck up and I'll drown your ass" than it is a scientific explanation of how it all could happen.

As for microorganisms, many of those would easily survive on the skin, hair, and inside the other animals that were lead on to this "massive ark"

Then you move on to how were they fed, water, and cleaned? A large animal would produce a proportional amount of excriment.

Bet it got pretty damn gamey on that there ark.

 

[Big Brother Val]

Not complete true. There are many species that are happy as a bug in a rug in brackish water. There are many stories of sharks swimming up in to fresh water rivers to feed.

It seems more of a tale of "fuck up and I'll drown your ass" than it is a scientific explanation of how it all could happen.

As for microorganisms, many of those would easily survive on the skin, hair, and inside the other animals that were lead on to this "massive ark"

Then you move on to how were they fed, water, and cleaned? A large animal would produce a proportional amount of excriment.

Bet it got pretty damn gamey on that there ark.

I'm not a fish expert... but I really didn't think freshwater could survive in salt water. But then again... what do I know?

And I'm sure animals had to eat their own shit... but they'd run out of it after 40 days and 40 nights, right? Your body wouldn't have anything left to shit.

Sure... Microorganisms are easy... they're tiny. Maybe he had a lot of stored water for the animals to drink... again, maybe they just took it out of the freshwater fish aquarium or something.

The whole concept to me seems like Santa Claus. Easy to believe in when you are a kid, when you still believe in magic... but to continue believing just blows my mind.

I'm not closed to it completely, though. It's like with women... I'm just trying to understand them, because they don't make any sense.

 

[Mad4Iron]

Shit women are real Bud,this shit is fantasy.

I'd rather spend my time tryng to get in a 20yr olds pants than wondering if Noah had enough provisions.

Mad

 

[big_bad_buff]

there was no such thing as a carnivore before the flood, this is one of the curses. and if you guys are really wanting answers, do some research. I'm not a bible scholar, but there are many out there that know the bible inside and out, and can answer all your questions.

Genesis 6:15 in the Bible tells us the Ark's dimensions were at least 135 meters long (300 cubits), 22.5 meters wide (50 cubits), and 13.5 meters high (30 cubits). That's 450 feet long, 75 feet wide, and 45 feet high! It could have been larger because several larger-sized cubits were used. But the 45-centimeter (18-inch) cubit is long enough to show the enormous size of the Ark.

http://www.users.bigpond.com/rdoolan/arksize.html

 

[Mad4Iron]

And after the flood canines erupted in mammals,just like that?

I don't want to insult your faith my friend,I however don't want my intelligence insulted.

Mad

 

[KnoXville]

Also, If the earth is a little over 6000 years old according to the bibble, then dinosaurs and man must have coexisted together. Maybe just the babies then, as they take up less space, eat less, smell less and wouldn't decide to munch on a Noah sandwich. Thanks again.

Score one for deductive imagination.

http://www.users.bigpond.com/rdoolan/dinosark.html

It seems logical that Noah would have taken any huge types of dinosaurs on the Ark when they were babies or small juveniles.

 

[Big Johnson]

If we start trying to base faith on facts, we'll all be agnostics before long.

 

[big_bad_buff]

And after the flood canines erupted in mammals,just like that?

I don't want to insult your faith my friend,I however don't want my intelligence insulted.

Mad

so cry me a river, what do you want me to say? this is what the bible says. go tell your story to the rest of the millions