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Finding time to work out v. maternal guilt

  • Thread starter Thread starter heatherrae
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heatherrae

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I am trying to get back in shape, but I have a dillemma -- when to work out. There is an awesome gym directly beside of my house with a huge indoor pool area with kiddie pools, huge waterslides, olympic size lap pool, all connected. It has a weight room, jogging track, classes, etc. That is all good and great, but it only has childcare on 4 days of the week for a few hours in the evening and some hours while I'm at work. There is no childcare on weekends. Then, I also feel guilty that I would be taking him to daycare all day and then dragging him to the gym daycare at night. I don't think that is fair to him.

I have thought about swimming with him in a little floaty, but I'm not sure that is good for a 6 month old to be in cool water that long. ??? I can't jog with him on the track because no strollers are allowed.

Plus, of course, lifting would mean putting him in the daycare.

Any opinions? Ideas?

Mommies, what do you do?
 
bw1 said:
Swimming would be great for him. Quit whinning and get your fat ass in the gym
Click to expand...
:worried:

dang!

So, just putting him in a floaty and swimming/pushing the floaty with me?
 
you think i could get in just as good of shape just swimming with dev as I would lifting?
 
heatherrae said:
:worried:

dang!

So, just putting him in a floaty and swimming/pushing the floaty with me?
Click to expand...

Yes. I swam competitively from from the time I could barely walk until I graduated high school. Kept me in unbelievable shape. Getting him used to the water would be a big benefit.

And take pics of you in a thong
 
heatherrae said:
I am trying to get back in shape, but I have a dillemma -- when to work out. There is an awesome gym directly beside of my house with a huge indoor pool area with kiddie pools, huge waterslides, olympic size lap pool, all connected. It has a weight room, jogging track, classes, etc. That is all good and great, but it only has childcare on 4 days of the week for a few hours in the evening and some hours while I'm at work. There is no childcare on weekends. Then, I also feel guilty that I would be taking him to daycare all day and then dragging him to the gym daycare at night. I don't think that is fair to him.

I have thought about swimming with him in a little floaty, but I'm not sure that is good for a 6 month old to be in cool water that long. ??? I can't jog with him on the track because no strollers are allowed.

Plus, of course, lifting would mean putting him in the daycare.

Any opinions? Ideas?

Mommies, what do you do?
Click to expand...


Kids need separation. I think a lot of parents are selfish and way over protective.

Go work out and let your little one enjoy himself in care. I had my daughter at the bball courts at 8 months & she was walking at 9 months.
 
heatherrae said:
you think i could get in just as good of shape just swimming with dev as I would lifting?
Click to expand...


Swimming is great exercise so it could benefit you big time. Don't give up on lifting though.
 
bw1 said:
Yes. I swam competitively from from the time I could barely walk until I graduated high school. Kept me in unbelievable shape. Getting him used to the water would be a big benefit.

And take pics of you in a thong
Click to expand...
lol...i wouldn't wear a thong to the gym pool. I actually don't think it is even allowed.

Great! This is what I'm going to try to do then.

I'm a strong swimmer. I swam every day in the summers as a kid for HOURS. I can literally tread water for hours and hours without even feeling any strain.
 
rudeboyja said:
Kids need separation. I think a lot of parents are selfish and way over protective.

Go work out and let your little one enjoy himself in care. I had my daughter at the bball courts at 8 months & she was walking at 9 months.
Click to expand...
He is seperated all day at daycare. I usually bring him home, change his diaper, give him some baby food, watch elmo or something with him, bath him and then nurse him to sleep. So, I only get to spend like 3 hours a night with him.

You think it wouldn't be bad to take some of that time to work out? That would mean maybe only an hour a night with him.
 
heatherrae said:
lol...i wouldn't wear a thong to the gym pool. I actually don't think it is even allowed.

Great! This is what I'm going to try to do then.

I'm a strong swimmer. I swam every day in the summers as a kid for HOURS. I can literally tread water for hours and hours without even feeling any strain.
Click to expand...


That's cause your tits keep you afloat.
 
heatherrae said:
He is seperated all day at daycare. I usually bring him home, change his diaper, give him some baby food, watch elmo or something with him, bath him and then nurse him to sleep. So, I only get to spend like 3 hours a night with him.

You think it wouldn't be bad to take some of that time to work out? That would mean maybe only an hour a night with him.
Click to expand...


I hear you. can you do something at home?
 
bw1 said:
That's cause your tits keep you afloat.
Click to expand...
lol...I didn't have boobs as a kid. I only got these when I was 24. Doctor Shuester installed them...lol.
 
rudeboyja said:
I hear you. can you do something at home?
Click to expand...
I could buy some dumbells, I guess. =-)

maybe I should do that after he goes to bed and swim with him 3 days a week or something?
 
I am in the pool at least 4 mornings a week for 25 to 30 minutes before my workday starts. The only other activity I do is walk up 11 flights of stairs to my office between 1 ro 3 times per day/5 days p week and I am in AWESOME shape.

As to the whole mommy guilt thing... I understand 100%.

My advice?

GET OVER IT! :)

If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. And believe me when I tell you that all kids want is for THEIR PARENTS to be happy....
 
heatherrae said:
I could buy some dumbells, I guess. =-)

maybe I should do that after he goes to bed and swim with him 3 days a week or something?
Click to expand...

just sayin, don't worry about him needing more time with you. Sounds like the other way around--- And thats understandable.

don't feel guilty. I think the best thing you can do as a parent is to let a kid develop on their own... Hell I should tell you my story....
 
BIKINIMOM said:
I am in the pool at least 4 mornings a week for 25 to 30 minutes before my workday starts. The only other activity I do is walk up 11 flights of stairs to my office between 1 ro 3 times per day/5 days p week and I am in AWESOME shape.

As to the whole mommy guilt thing... I understand 100%.

My advice?

GET OVER IT! :)

If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. And believe me when I tell you that all kids want is for THEIR PARENTS to be happy....
Click to expand...
Cool! Now I'm feeling hopeful! I will do the swimming with him at night!
 
rudeboyja said:
just sayin, don't worry about him needing more time with you. Sounds like the other way around--- And thats understandable.

don't feel guilty. I think the best thing you can do as a parent is to let a kid develop on their own... Hell I should tell you my story....
Click to expand...
Thanks, that is very encouraging. =-)
 
heatherrae said:
Cool! Now I'm feeling hopeful! I will do the swimming with him at night!
Click to expand...


yes - the swimming with a decent diet should be plenty! Enjoy your time with baby they are only babies once!

....if thats what you want.
 
HR, I know it can be difficult but you have to lose the sense of guilt. Being a single mom I'm sure, you feel you're spreading yourself thin and never doing enough. You need time for you and you'll both benefit mentally and physically.
Take him in pool when you can but don't worry about the extra hour he'll be in daycare when you swim and lift on your own.
I know Devon is the most important thing in your life but you're not just a mom.
 
1 hour a day seems kinda sparse... is there a 24hr gym you could work out at after little Demetrius goes to sleep?
 
heatherrae said:
I am trying to get back in shape, but I have a dillemma -- when to work out. There is an awesome gym directly beside of my house with a huge indoor pool area with kiddie pools, huge waterslides, olympic size lap pool, all connected. It has a weight room, jogging track, classes, etc. That is all good and great, but it only has childcare on 4 days of the week for a few hours in the evening and some hours while I'm at work. There is no childcare on weekends. Then, I also feel guilty that I would be taking him to daycare all day and then dragging him to the gym daycare at night. I don't think that is fair to him.

I have thought about swimming with him in a little floaty, but I'm not sure that is good for a 6 month old to be in cool water that long. ??? I can't jog with him on the track because no strollers are allowed.

Plus, of course, lifting would mean putting him in the daycare.

Any opinions? Ideas?

Mommies, what do you do?
Click to expand...

agreed about having the child in daycare while youre at work and then taking him to another daycare in the evenings.

solution: buy yourself a treadmill and workout at home. i think that's honestly the best best for single parents of small babies/children.

there are also workout tapes you can do at home with him right there inthe room with you (tae bo, yoga, pilates, etc) lots of options
 
nimbus said:
1 hour a day seems kinda sparse... is there a 24hr gym you could work out at after little Demetrius goes to sleep?
Click to expand...
You mean leave a 6 month at home asleep by himself while I go to the gym?


:lmao:

Holy cow, child abuse!
 
Smurfy said:
agreed about having the child in daycare while youre at work and then taking him to another daycare in the evenings.

solution: buy yourself a treadmill and workout at home. i think that's honestly the best best for single parents of small babies/children.

there are also workout tapes you can do at home with him right there inthe room with you (tae bo, yoga, pilates, etc) lots of options
Click to expand...
That is a good point, too. I don't really have much floor space (big furniture and small place) but I could put a fold up treadmill in one corner maybe.
 
Start building a simple home gym. A set of dumbells, a core strengthening ball, some music, a swing for baby and your all set. Build your home gym as you go along and pick up things as you need them and you should be all set.

In the privacy of your home, you don't have to worry about visible panty lines and the social BS of the gym either.
 
heatherrae said:
That is a good point, too. I don't really have much floor space (big furniture and small place) but I could put a fold up treadmill in one corner maybe.
Click to expand...
Get a bigger place, problem solved.
 
heatherrae said:
I am trying to get back in shape, but I have a dillemma -- when to work out. There is an awesome gym directly beside of my house with a huge indoor pool area with kiddie pools, huge waterslides, olympic size lap pool, all connected. It has a weight room, jogging track, classes, etc. That is all good and great, but it only has childcare on 4 days of the week for a few hours in the evening and some hours while I'm at work. There is no childcare on weekends. Then, I also feel guilty that I would be taking him to daycare all day and then dragging him to the gym daycare at night. I don't think that is fair to him.

I have thought about swimming with him in a little floaty, but I'm not sure that is good for a 6 month old to be in cool water that long. ??? I can't jog with him on the track because no strollers are allowed.

Plus, of course, lifting would mean putting him in the daycare.

Any opinions? Ideas?

Mommies, what do you do?
Click to expand...

HR... I met my wife at the gym when she was training to get back in shape after having Tori. She put her in daycare and just got it done. I admired her for that and being a single mom who was making it on her own... like you. ( you do know that I think highly of you). I started helping her switch from machines to free weights and now she is leaner ( but not lighter) than when she was a Hawaiin Tropic girl in college. One thing led to another and we were married two years later. She looks great, our kids are happy and well adjusted, and I could not be happier because she is happy.

Ok... sorry for gushing. Just get in the gym and work out.

S
 
roadwarrior said:
HR... I met my wife at the gym when she was training to get back in shape after having Tori. She put her in daycare and just got it done. I admired her for that and being a single mom who was making it on her own... like you. ( you do know that I think highly of you). I started helping her switch from machines to free weights and now she is leaner ( but not lighter) than when she was a Hawaiin Tropic girl in college. One thing led to another and we were married two years later. She looks great, our kids are happy and well adjusted, and I could not be happier because she is happy.

Ok... sorry for gushing. Just get in the gym and work out.

S
Click to expand...
Thanks.


You are a great guy for standing by her through that, too. =-)
 
heatherrae said:
I am trying to get back in shape, but I have a dillemma -- when to work out. There is an awesome gym directly beside of my house with a huge indoor pool area with kiddie pools, huge waterslides, olympic size lap pool, all connected. It has a weight room, jogging track, classes, etc. That is all good and great, but it only has childcare on 4 days of the week for a few hours in the evening and some hours while I'm at work. There is no childcare on weekends. Then, I also feel guilty that I would be taking him to daycare all day and then dragging him to the gym daycare at night. I don't think that is fair to him.

I have thought about swimming with him in a little floaty, but I'm not sure that is good for a 6 month old to be in cool water that long. ??? I can't jog with him on the track because no strollers are allowed.

Plus, of course, lifting would mean putting him in the daycare.

Any opinions? Ideas?

Mommies, what do you do?
Click to expand...

Daycare is not "mean". It is good for kids to learn to be around other people.
 
all the whey said:
Daycare is not "mean". It is good for kids to learn to be around other people.
Click to expand...
He gets 9 hours of daycare every day.
 
I guess I was a bad mom because I worked all day and still took my girls to the gym daycare at night for an hour to get a workout in.
 
bw1 said:
Yes. I swam competitively from from the time I could barely walk until I graduated high school. Kept me in unbelievable shape. Getting him used to the water would be a big benefit.

And take pics of you in a thong
Click to expand...

Swimming competitively is different than her pushing Denny around on a floaty.
 
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silverstar1025 said:
I guess I was a bad mom because I worked all day and still took my girls to the gym daycare at night for an hour to get a workout in.
Click to expand...
No, I'm not saying that!

I'm just torn. I'm not sure what the "right" answer is.
 
heatherrae said:
No, I'm not saying that!

I'm just torn. I'm not sure what the "right" answer is.
Click to expand...

Oh no I was not implying that you think people are bad that do that. I just meant you are so worried about doing it that I feel like a bad Mom now. lol Seriously though a fit Mommy is a happy Mommy. It's good to get rid of that stress for the day and feel good about yourself. You will be a better Mom when you are in a better mood IMO.
 
heatherrae said:
No, I'm not saying that!

I'm just torn. I'm not sure what the "right" answer is.
Click to expand...


Its okay heather, you have a new baby and he is your number one priority, not yourself. Its great you feel this way and its normal. There is no right answer, but if you are not comfortable taking him to day care again right after work, let me tell you, its totally fine to work out at home.
 
all the whey said:
Swimming competitively is different than her pushing Denny around on a floaty.
Click to expand...
shut up, butt munch. Go chop some kitteh photos or sumpin.
 
heatherrae said:
No, I'm not saying that!

I'm just torn. I'm not sure what the "right" answer is.
Click to expand...

There isn't necessarily a "right answer".
Just be sure to do things for yourself too.
Otherwise, next thing you know you'll be giving him a whooping at WalMart.
 
rudeboyja said:
early social skills.
Click to expand...
babies actually don't really interact with one another at his age yet. Their little brains are not developmentally progressed that far until they are a little older. You put a buch of 6 month olds in a room together and they don't interact with one another at all
 
its hard believe me i know. i was lucky because in the navy i was able to work out during lunch and since i was in the gym i got an extended lunch but when i got out of work for the day even though my wife worked at the day care my son was at i still stopped by and picked him up even though she still had 2 more hours of work. i never missed a minute with him if i could help it. when he got older it was easier to put him in the gyms daycare because at first when he was born i hated being away. it gets easier as he gets older. plus it taught him to be more independent.

as for your dilemma i agree to use the pool with him for your cardio and put him in the daycare for the rest of your workout which after the cardio for now could be a half hour. as he gets older you can spread the time out but being a single mom its tough to handle it all yourself. like someone said on this thread if your not happy then hes not happy. they can sense it trust me.
 
bigmann245 said:
its hard believe me i know. i was lucky because in the navy i was able to work out during lunch and since i was in the gym i got an extended lunch but when i got out of work for the day even though my wife worked at the day care my son was at i still stopped by and picked him up even though she still had 2 more hours of work. i never missed a minute with him if i could help it. when he got older it was easier to put him in the gyms daycare because at first when he was born i hated being away. it gets easier as he gets older. plus it taught him to be more independent.

as for your dilemma i agree to use the pool with him for your cardio and put him in the daycare for the rest of your workout which after the cardio for now could be a half hour. as he gets older you can spread the time out but being a single mom its tough to handle it all yourself. like someone said on this thread if your not happy then hes not happy. they can sense it trust me.
Click to expand...
We have been really happy and everyone tells me that he is the happiest and most observant baby they have ever seen. Even the pediatricians nurse yesterday told me that he is her favorite baby. I just want to keep him that way for as long as possible. Life is tough. Childhood should be awesome. ;-)
 
heatherrae said:
babies actually don't really interact with one another at his age yet. Their little brains are not developmentally progressed that far until they are a little older. You put a buch of 6 month olds in a room together and they don't interact with one another at all
Click to expand...


what about that movie with the babies who could talk to each other? dont tell me that wasnt real.
 
Heather, try to do something at home.
My son is 3 months old. I have a routine. The first time he takes a nap, I grab the baby monitor and jump on the treadmill in the garage. Unless he wakes up, I stay there for 30-45 minutes. He usually wakes up when I'm in the shower right after the treadmill. I feed him, play with him, whatever else until he goes to sleep. Then I do a bunch of pushups, lunges, crunches until he wakes up.
I understand u don't have a treadmill. Find something else. If he doesn't nap after u pick him up, put him in a swing and let him watch u work out. He would prolly laugh and wonder what ur doing. Get some dumbells...or something. Get a video. As long as you find something to do, it will be better than nothing. He will get older and the options will change. I know u said small space big furniture. Call me crazy(i hear it all the time) but I would ditch a large piece of furniture for treadmill space. I would rather trash my couch and have my friends sit on the floor than feel fat. Self esteem is very important. Example: I have a 2 car garage. I let my hubby keep his' spot. My car is parked on the street. U know why? Because I gave my garage spot to my treadmill.
 
find a gym with a daycare .
Or pay some girl to come over like 5$ a hour to watch your kid while you lift
 
bigmann245 said:
you obviously didnt read this thread before you posted...lol
Click to expand...
I did . She has to face reality and do what other mothers do when they need to have a child looked after .
Not this " i dont want to do daycare or have a babysitter blah blah blah"
It's ether that or buy a home gym.

people will make any excuse they can . When in fact if their is a will their is a way
 
heatherrae said:
I'm a strong swimmer. I swam every day in the summers as a kid for HOURS. I can literally tread water for hours and hours without even feeling any strain.
Click to expand...


silicone floats.....
 
Life's too short and they're only little once, get the equipment and workout at home, save yourself the stress. This way you can workout when you want, at your convenience, like if you wake up early or he takes a nap on the weekends you don't have to worry about disturbing him and missing out time with him. Get a piece of cardio equipment, a set of power blocs and a small, portable bench. You can do just about everything you need to do to stay in good shape.

As for space, look around for what you can sacrifice in terms of having a pretty home versus being practical. I gave up a "formal" dining room, turned it into the cardio room. I don't do formal sit down meals except once or twice a year, and the dining table just ended up being a general catch all. On the other hand, the cardio equipment gets used virtually every day.
 
musclemom said:
Life's too short and they're only little once, get the equipment and workout at home, save yourself the stress. This way you can workout when you want, at your convenience, like if you wake up early or he takes a nap on the weekends you don't have to worry about disturbing him and missing out time with him. Get a piece of cardio equipment, a set of power blocs and a small, portable bench. You can do just about everything you need to do to stay in good shape.

As for space, look around for what you can sacrifice in terms of having a pretty home versus being practical. I gave up a "formal" dining room, turned it into the cardio room. I don't do formal sit down meals except once or twice a year, and the dining table just ended up being a general catch all. On the other hand, the cardio equipment gets used virtually every day.
Click to expand...

You only need dumbells and a bench. squats,lunges,dips,benchpress,kickbacks,shoulder presses,back rows,stiff legged deads,bicep curl variations,shrugs.
throw a 2x4 under your feet bend over the bench and do clave raises.
Sure it will not be the most exotic work out in the world.
But you have to do what you have to do. You can do the whole set up for under 50$ if by used in a paper of craigslist.
My wife has a used epliptical machine a 600$ machine she paid 100$ for it off craigslist . We throw a plastic cover on it and set it up outside do to little extra room in the house.
 
parenting is taking other parents advice with a grain of salt but in the end you do what you feel is right for you and your son. it will come to you.
 
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