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Emotional lobotomy

polarpixie

New member
I don't want to feel happiness
for what follows can only be sadness.
I'd rather feel ambiguous feeling of nothingness
It's nothing that will save me.

~~~~~~~~~

Ever think like this? That it would be better to walk thru life as an emotionless robot?
 
Ok.. that was not the most sensitive approach... You just have to understand you cannot have good without bad.. Nothingness is like not having life at all... Between pain and nothing, I'd take pain every day of the week.

Perk up lil butter cup...
 
polarpixie said:
I don't want to feel happiness
for what follows can only be sadness.
I'd rather feel ambiguous feeling of nothingness
It's nothing that will save me.

~~~~~~~~~

Ever think like this? That it would be better to walk thru life as an emotionless robot?

are you an aspiring poet?

that was pretty good seriuosly

you got to embrase your emotions at least partially....... to shut them off would be to cheat yourself, others, and God.

we have these feelings for a reason, and a good one at that .......to fight them or suppress them would be to negate a very special part of our humanity.

plus your pretty nice:)

so if you were to give less I fear people would suffer..... imho
 
Last edited:
Trust me.. if you can achieve this... you will be free!!!!

I been telling this to people for some time now. Nowhere... Nothing.


perfect.
 
Steriod_Virgin said:
Ok.. that was not the most sensitive approach... You just have to understand you cannot have good without bad.. Nothingness is like not having life at all... Between pain and nothing, I'd take pain every day of the week.

Perk up lil butter cup...
No it wasn't so sensitive, so thanks for recognizing that. :) I'm not really down or anything right now, it was just a thought....

OMEGA said:


are you an aspiring poet?

that was pretty good seriuosly

you got to embrase your emotions at least partially....... to shut them off would be to cheat yourself, others, and God.

we have these feelings for a reason, and a good one at that .......to fight them or suppress them would be to negate a very special part of our humanity.

plus your pretty nice:)

so if you were to give less I fear people would suffer..... imho

Hey OMEGA, thank you, for all of what you just said. :bigkiss: I guess I am an aspiring poet in a way, I just like attempting to write poetry sometimes as a way to express my thoughts. It would be nice to publish something one day if I ever get better at it...:)
 
Steriod_Virgin said:
Between pain and nothing, I'd take pain every day of the week.
B]



BULLSHIT!!!!

what kind of pain are you talking about? I have pain in my knees I am willing to bet you would not take.. imagine the pain of losing a family member... you would wish this upon yourself??? How about the pain of losing someone you love... you mean you would rather feel that than nothing?

If so.. you have never felt any pain.
 
dballer said:



BULLSHIT!!!!

what kind of pain are you talking about? I have pain in my knees I am willing to bet you would not take.. imagine the pain of losing a family member... you would wish this upon yourself??? How about the pain of losing someone you love... you mean you would rather feel that than nothing?

If so.. you have never felt any pain.

Exactly. I didn't feel like saying it...I think I would happily give up the good if it means that would eliminate the bad. Maybe people who haven't felt pain for long periods of time don't understand that. I have nothing to complain about, really, but when I hurt, I hurt deeply, and I'm no baby when it comes to pain either. I wouldn't want to stop being nice to people or giving 110%, but I'd like the ability to never feel an attachment to anyone at the same time. It is probably not be the best solution for everyone tho, but it might be for some.
 
polarpixie said:

No it wasn't so sensitive, so thanks for recognizing that. :) I'm not really down or anything right now, it was just a thought....



Hey OMEGA, thank you, for all of what you just said. :bigkissit...:)

hey not a problem:)

i just spot em' as I see em'
:)

ever since I have been injesting large amounts of dianabol thankd to Dballers regimen for gyno....I have been way more sensitive emotionally...all that estrogen ya know

so your poetry struck me as particullarly heart felt and touching.....

just kidding about the dball.....
 
dballer said:


you mean you would rather feel that than nothing?........

If so.. you have never felt any pain.


yup, thats what i was thinking.


FYI pixie stick, my brother went on SSRI's and he said it lessened his capacity to feel emotions. So maybe you will get the same effect.
 
OMEGA... andriol is weak as shit. You will need to eat 10 a day to get zits. If you wanna be a bear.. be a GRIZZLY!!!!


Nord.. I tried the SSRIs.. they did not work to well. I just got done ordering some Thorazine tablets. This is supposed to be the Anadrol of anti-depressants.
 
dballer said:


Nord.. I tried the SSRIs.. they did not work to well. I just got done ordering some Thorazine tablets. This is supposed to be the Anadrol of anti-depressants.


i was going to bring up the typical antipsychotics. If you do go that route, you may want to avoid atypical antipsychotics as i think that they can recreate an ability to feel emotions in schizophrenics.

ps, your location says 'jaws clenched'. i assume you only have one jaw, so that is a misprint.
 
FUCK! YOu get Karma for that one!! I would love to have a switch to shut off my emotions... just flick it... like Data on Star Trek... Damn, I envy him... being human sucks ass sometimes. With all the great emotions I feel, I have some of the shittiest ones...

There is only one way to turn your emotions off however, and that is to extinguish your candle for good... not a step I'm ready to take yet... I have found that taking alot of AS makes me think on a one track mind and that's all I care about... sound like a plan??

C
 
OMEGA....sensitive to others is not such a bad thing. I'm glad you liked it because I don't really share stuff like that with anyone because it is one of those things where it is only good to me and I'd just feel silly.


Nord and S_V, I've tried SSRIs too, didn't do much. Besides, I don't want to have to take a pill for answers.
 
polarpixie said:
OMEGA....sensitive to others is not such a bad thing. I'm glad you liked it because I don't really share stuff like that with anyone because it is one of those things where it is only good to me and I'd just feel silly.



well actually I was joking about the juice....... I am just sensitive anyway in a confidant way though if that makes any sense.

I am sensitive to the needs, and feeling of others, but personally I am a brick house.

and pixie thanks for sharing:)

it was really nice to read that
 
Citruscide said:
FUCK! YOu get Karma for that one!! I would love to have a switch to shut off my emotions... just flick it... like Data on Star Trek... Damn, I envy him... being human sucks ass sometimes. With all the great emotions I feel, I have some of the shittiest ones...

There is only one way to turn your emotions off however, and that is to extinguish your candle for good... not a step I'm ready to take yet... I have found that taking alot of AS makes me think on a one track mind and that's all I care about... sound like a plan??

C

Damn...hard-earned karma from Citurscide, my day is getting better already! Exactly. Typically I feel 70% shitty, 25% Ok, 5% great. I spread out the 25-30% of OK and great to everyone else during the day, and in the evenings I keep the 70% shitty all to myself. It just doesn't add up. I don't know about the AS, but the one track mind to working on my body does help.
 
dballer said:



BULLSHIT!!!!

what kind of pain are you talking about? I have pain in my knees I am willing to bet you would not take.. imagine the pain of losing a family member... you would wish this upon yourself??? How about the pain of losing someone you love... you mean you would rather feel that than nothing?

If so.. you have never felt any pain.

No, I have had plenty of sorrow.. But I guess some people are just stronger than others... quit feeling sorry for yourself, mr. I have had it worse than you..

There is a difference between being able to turn off emotions selectively at will, and living the rest of your life with out any feelings or emotions..

If you rather have no emotions go get a fucking lobotomy you prick
 
polarpixie said:


Damn...hard-earned karma from Citurscide, my day is getting better already! Exactly. Typically I feel 70% shitty, 25% Ok, 5% great. I spread out the 25-30% of OK and great to everyone else during the day, and in the evenings I keep the 70% shitty all to myself. It just doesn't add up. I don't know about the AS, but the one track mind to working on my body does help.

You just need to convince yourself that the world around you cannot effect you. Other people cannot MAKE you feel worse... they cannot MAKE you feel sad, or upset, or depressed. ONLY YOU can do that. Once you realize that (which I am TRYING to do), then you are one step ahead of the game.

I mentioned the AS because when I am on them, I tend to not give a shit about what goes around me... and the sole focus is getting huge. It's tough now though, because I am with the most wonderful woman in the world... she makes me feel awesome, but at the same time... she is always down because of her job... and this makes me feel bad because there is nothing I can do about it... nothing I can do will make her happy... I tend to take things out on myself in these circumstances...

Anyway, Polar... if you want to chat, you've got my AIM

C
 
Steriod_Virgin said:


No, I have had plenty of sorrow.. But I guess some people are just stronger than others... quit feeling sorry for yourself, mr. I have had it worse than you..

There is a difference between being able to turn off emotions selectively at will, and living the rest of your life with out any feelings or emotions..

If you rather have no emotions go get a fucking lobotomy you prick

You are calling me a prick because you live a sheltered life you seem to me the one in touch with your emotional side ..... pussy!
 
dragonmona -- you are lucky. :)

Citrusicde -- thanks for the words big guy. I see what you mean about the AS, sounds like you've got a great girl by your side tho, so don't let your one-track get in the way of ignoring even her. I bet you are helping to make her feel better just by letting her know how much you care about her, (like you do in almost every post you make)! :D

db and s_v...come on now.....no yelling on my thread....:(
 
Dballer:

You sound like a fragile little boy who can't deal with a little heart ache every now and then.. Dballer: "Boo hoo hoo, I wish I felt nothing, I cant take all this pain.." If you cant take pain, and you call yourself a body builder there is something wrong with you. Quit whining like a little bitch and learn to suck it up... sheeesh.

Ever heard: Better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all?? I guess since you probably never had love, to you its better not to have it at all...
 
polarpixie said:
I don't want to feel happiness
for what follows can only be sadness.
I'd rather feel ambiguous feeling of nothingness
It's nothing that will save me.

~~~~~~~~~

Ever think like this? That it would be better to walk thru life as an emotionless robot?


I have been there. Not feeling happiness or sadness, just existing. It's not fun. I would be willing to accept the sadness just to feel some moments of happiness.

I managed to do it without pills or anything. I just let other people's lives take priority over mine. I am working to change that, because that's not what I want in my life. I want to feel the happiness that I used to feel. I even want to feel the sadness that may come with it. I just want to live life again.
 
Oh..and OMEGA......."he's a brick....haaaause...." hehe...;) Dang how much karma do I have to spread around before I can give you some again????
 
Steriod_Virgin said:

Ever heard: Better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all??



:confused:

out of curiosity, do you think breaking up with someone is a horrible torture? there are different levels of pain. Some are setbacks, some are large setbacks, and some threaten the very fabric of your psychological or physical existence. The latter are designed to be so severe that not existing is a better alternative while in the midst of one.
 
No.. I have been taken out of context yet again.. I merely made the acertion that I choose to have the option of feeling joy, at the expense of feeling pain... if the alternative is feeling NOTHING EVER.
 
nordstrom said:




:confused:

out of curiosity, do you think breaking up with someone is a horrible torture? there are different levels of pain. Some are setbacks, some are large setbacks, and some threaten the very fabric of your psychological or physical existence. The latter are designed to be so severe that not existing is a better alternative while in the midst of one.

Nord.. we are dealing with a kid whos father still does his taxes. Mom still lends him 5 bucks when cash gets tight.

Pain is somthing he has only watched on TV.
 
Steroid_Virgin and Dballer -- hope you're done now....please? :)

Bigs, I guess I don't mean losing a lust for life or anything like that. I'm talking more about feelings for people. I don't want to give up the happiness that is derived from seeking thrills or hanging out with friends, or doing something new and doing it well. No, those type of things don't typically cause you sadness. It's when it comes to feelings between people that it becomes a two-way street, it's the people you care about who have the ability to make you feel sadness. Not that I want to stop caring about people in general, I just don't want to have any favorites.

nordstrom said:
ps, your location says 'jaws clenched'. i assume you only have one jaw, so that is a misprint.

He meant jaws like as in the killer shark. lol. :D
 
polarpixie said:
It's when it comes to feelings between people that it becomes a two-way street, it's the people you care about who have the ability to make you feel sadness. Not that I want to stop caring about people in general, I just don't want to have any favorites.



That is what makes life worth living. You trust people to care for you the way that you care for them. Sometimes you find that your trust was misplaced, and yes it hurts. Then there are the times that you find that you trusted the right person, and you have someone there for you when ever you need them, and you are there for them.

You won't find many people like that in your lifetime. That is why you should cherish them. I would rather not have been hurt in my life, but I know that if I had not been I would never have found the true friend I have now.:)
 
big4life said:




That is what makes life worth living. You trust people to care for you the way that you care for them. Sometimes you find that your trust was misplaced, and yes it hurts. Then there are the times that you find that you trusted the right person, and you have someone there for you when ever you need them, and you are there for them.

You won't find many people like that in your lifetime. That is why you should cherish them. I would rather not have been hurt in my life, but I know that if I had not been I would never have found the true friend I have now.:)

WELL SAID BIG4LIFE... note to dballer...
 
big4life said:




That is what makes life worth living. You trust people to care for you the way that you care for them. Sometimes you find that your trust was misplaced, and yes it hurts. Then there are the times that you find that you trusted the right person, and you have someone there for you when ever you need them, and you are there for them.

You won't find many people like that in your lifetime. That is why you should cherish them. I would rather not have been hurt in my life, but I know that if I had not been I would never have found the true friend I have now.:)

*Applause*

C
 
Go back and read what I said you ignorant fuck.

I said it is easier to block out pain than to let it get the best of you. So you are a guy who likes to run around getting hurt... well.. good luck Gomer... Have another glass of Kendall Jackson or a Spritzer and give the world a big hug.
 
big4life said:
That is what makes life worth living. You trust people to care for you the way that you care for them. Sometimes you find that your trust was misplaced, and yes it hurts. Then there are the times that you find that you trusted the right person, and you have someone there for you when ever you need them, and you are there for them.

You won't find many people like that in your lifetime. That is why you should cherish them. I would rather not have been hurt in my life, but I know that if I had not been I would never have found the true friend I have now.:)
See, I think that is just one thing that makes life worth living, but there are so many other adventures to be had out of life besides loving and losing love or trusting and losing trust. There are so many other things that make life fun like exploring the world or learning a new sport or winning a game. The potential disappointments those type of things may cause will be cause far less damage than what just one person can do to you. If I was able to, I'd like to cut out the emotions dealing with people and derive my joy and pain solely from the things that I do, and not the people that I care a great deal for.
 
Polar, you're right about getting enjoyment out of other things, but if you don't have people to share those experiences with, all you end up with is a scrapbook full of memories, and nobody to share them with.

You can't just cut off your emotions for others. You may not get hurt if you do, but you also will not feel the love of that special someone in your heart. When they stare into your eyes and your heart just starts pounding from the excitement you feel. When they caress your face or your body and you feel their touch all the way to your soul. When you know that no matter what, they will be there for you, in the bad times as well as the good times.

You can avoid getting hurt, but you will miss out on so much more.:)
 
big4life said:
Polar, you're right about getting enjoyment out of other things, but if you don't have people to share those experiences with, all you end up with is a scrapbook full of memories, and nobody to share them with.

You can't just cut off your emotions for others. You may not get hurt if you do, but you also will not feel the love of that special someone in your heart. When they stare into your eyes and your heart just starts pounding from the excitement you feel. When they caress your face or your body and you feel their touch all the way to your soul. When you know that no matter what, they will be there for you, in the bad times as well as the good times.

You can avoid getting hurt, but you will miss out on so much more.:)

Bigs, I know you are right, and I hope that you have a special someone to share your big heart with. :D As for me, I've already done the loved and lost thing. I'm not down on love or anything like that, it makes me really happy to see it happen with other people. I think that for me, personally, it'd more rational, and I'd be happier and more focused, if I was somehow incapable of love.

I sound pretty pessimistic, but I'm not trying to be. I think I'm just trying to be rational and logical. I dunno, the more I refine my thoughts on this topic, the more it makes sense. :) But it is almost pointless to discuss it because I doubt that I am capable of turning my feelings off just like that anyway.
 
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