damn my step-son is in trouble

[hondas2k666]

oh, trust me, he knows whats right and wrong, he just doesnt know whos a good person and whos a bad person until he gets in trouble. he already enrolled to the community college and after he finsihes his 2 classes in adult high school, then he'll graduate in june. which he will do the classes. his mother father and brother all didnt go to college and he is destined to go and succeed. the thing is, his parents left him when he was born, they left him with his grandmother and his father moved to ny and his mother was knowwhere to be found. she finally came back 2 years ago and that kinda caused some trouble because his mother wants to tell him what to do so he says that she wasnt there all his life, that she has no right even though she is his mother. the family all fight and argue alot and he just turns to his friends instead of dealing with family problems and he just drinks his problems away wen ever there is a family fight. he not an alcoholic i guess. i mean he drinks maybe once or twice within 2 months but he just drinks so much and doesnt know what hes doing and always mouth off to the cops when they come. its just that hes thinkin since knowone cared about him wen he was young, why should they anyone care now. he doesnt want anyone. he listens to us and especially his grandmother. he listens to his grandmother the most more then anyone. but she sleeps at around 9-10 pm and then he goes out and theres just so much that she can do. he knows that drinking is bad especially at that age but we cant lock him in his room til hes 21. in the daytime, he stays home, worksout with me, then stays home and i go to work and my wife does too. his mother also spoils the shit out of his brother even though he has no job and doesnt go to college. he gets jealous but he then jus drinks his problems away. his father isnt much better. him and his older brother go visit him once every 3 moths and he'll give them like $500 each but come on now, $2000 each for a year? its whatever with him. they just go for the money because they know hes an asshole. i just dont know whut to do. i treat him as my own son and he knows that.

 

[mikey007]

Yea he needs a reality check. let him do the time next time. I used to work in a prison and "scared straight" does work for some kids. Also sounds like he needs extensive counseling too.

 

[misticat]

I would have to agree here... i was a troubled teenager too. Got in all sorts of shit with the law...I got put in county for 90 days and it was like a light switch being around real losers.

I feel you about wanting to do something but a little tuff love works well... Just be very supportive and sympathetic. And help him when he gets out, put him back in some good shoes.

 

[off_safety]

aside from posessing a weapon, i got in trouble for the same things when i was a teen. i dont think drinking and smoking weed means your headed for the pen. i think everbody here did the same things when they were younger, only problem is your stepson keeps getting caught.
im not saying he needs to be sneakier or anything, it just doesnt seem like he's committing major crimes like assault, theft, or getting dui's and stuff like that. get a lawyer to keep him out of juvy, but help him understand that when he turns 18 he goes to bigboy jail, and this shit will be on his record for life.
just my .O2, good luck bro. he's lucky to have a dad who even gives a shit about him, blood or not. props to you man. he'll find his way. we all do, just at our own pace.

 

[needtogetaas]

i know this doesnt go here but i dont know where else to put it. my step-son has been on probation since september 2006, he was given 1 year of probation for possession of marijuana,possession of weapon, school zone, intent to distribute, and about 2 months after all that, he was arrested for disorderly conduct because he was drunk. he had court for all the charges on the same day and the judge said hes gonna give him a choice to take 60 days in a juvenile detention or 1 year of probation so he took the 1 year probation. he is in an adult school and needed 50 credits at the time which is 10 classes, now he only needs 10 credits to graduate by june. and in february 2007(last month) he was arrested for possession of alcohol, the charge was possession of alcohol while underage. he went to his probation officer and told her and she said she has to violate him because the judge knows that hes on probation, but she going to tell the judge that hes been doing good and she will suggest a 6 week boot camp program instead of going to juvie bexcause juvie wont do anything but make things worse for him. hes also been going to a drug and alcohol counseling, he gets the drug/alcohol test twice a week and he hasnt failed any of them. his court date just came and its on march 30th 2007. so what im trying to figure out is if there is a big chance that he will be sent to a juvenile detetion home or will he just have to go to alcohol meetings instead?

even though hes not my real blood son, it still bothers me. hes a good kid but just makes stupid decisions and hes still young. hes 17, 18 in july.

anyone with any imput?

im really worried about him

what state do you live in.this will have a impact on the out come.

 

[paradox]

I served in the marines for 4 years and I seen some guys completly change there life there. But you have to want to turn your life around.

 

[needtogetaas]

i know this doesnt go here but i dont know where else to put it. my step-son has been on probation since september 2006, he was given 1 year of probation for possession of marijuana,possession of weapon, school zone, intent to distribute, and about 2 months after all that, he was arrested for disorderly conduct because he was drunk. he had court for all the charges on the same day and the judge said hes gonna give him a choice to take 60 days in a juvenile detention or 1 year of probation so he took the 1 year probation. he is in an adult school and needed 50 credits at the time which is 10 classes, now he only needs 10 credits to graduate by june. and in february 2007(last month) he was arrested for possession of alcohol, the charge was possession of alcohol while underage. he went to his probation officer and told her and she said she has to violate him because the judge knows that hes on probation, but she going to tell the judge that hes been doing good and she will suggest a 6 week boot camp program instead of going to juvie bexcause juvie wont do anything but make things worse for him. hes also been going to a drug and alcohol counseling, he gets the drug/alcohol test twice a week and he hasnt failed any of them. his court date just came and its on march 30th 2007. so what im trying to figure out is if there is a big chance that he will be sent to a juvenile detetion home or will he just have to go to alcohol meetings instead?

even though hes not my real blood son, it still bothers me. hes a good kid but just makes stupid decisions and hes still young. hes 17, 18 in july.

anyone with any imput?

im really worried about him

your kid is going to get sent some were when he gos to court....the ??? now is were...and here is some thing to think about.even if he gets sent to jew-v
and the judge gives him 60-90 days I give him 2 weeks tops and he will be out on a bed crunch and on tracking.jew-v halls are packed they ant got room for
them all and when knew kids come in they send kids with smaller records like your son home to make room for the others.its called a bed crunch and they do it like 3-4 times a week.......your kids charges are nothing compared to the ones I had and I was sent home in a week.

 

[daveyboy2345]

get him involved in recreational bodybuilding and nutrition, this will keep him away from his loser friends and give him structure in his life.

 

[hondas2k666]

this happened in nj where we live. o i know, he works out with me, i bring him to the vitaminn shoppe and we buy are shit, he works out with me. no juice for him tho. he doesnt know im on it tho. he also has an anger problem and tends to punch walls in his room when hes pissed. so i bought him a 100 pound punching bag, hasnt punched a wall since. hes in drug and alcohol counseling now, his probation officer told him to go. im really hoping that he doesnt have to go away, maybe extended probation and fines, i just dont think that juvie will do anything to him but make things worse considering that the kids in there kill people, rob houses,steal cars, assualts, worse things then just possession of alcohol

 

[paradox]

this happened in nj where we live. o i know, he works out with me, i bring him to the vitaminn shoppe and we buy are shit, he works out with me. no juice for him tho. he doesnt know im on it tho. he also has an anger problem and tends to punch walls in his room when hes pissed. so i bought him a 100 pound punching bag, hasnt punched a wall since. hes in drug and alcohol counseling now, his probation officer told him to go. im really hoping that he doesnt have to go away, maybe extended probation and fines, i just dont think that juvie will do anything to him but make things worse considering that the kids in there kill people, rob houses,steal cars, assualts, worse things then just possession of alcohol

Seriously suggest to him that he enlist in the marines and talk to the recuiter about going into a infantry unit. It will either make or break him.