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A Funny: A few examples how men and woman are not the same.

velvett

Elite Mentor
Platinum
NICKNAMES

· If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

· If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.


EATING OUT

· When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

· When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.


MONEY

· A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

· A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale.


BATHROOMS

· A man has 6 items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel .

· The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.


ARGUMENTS

· A woman has the last word in any argument.

· Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.


FUTURE

· A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

· A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.


SUCCESS

· A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

· A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


MARRIAGE

· A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

· A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.


DRESSING UP

· A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the bin, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

· A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.


NATURAL

· Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

· Women somehow deteriorate during the night.


OFFSPRING

· Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

· A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
 
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.


omg...this is so true.

and I remember the ones in college used to leave their "beauty trail" (a.k.a facial imprint of makeup) on my pillows the next morning.
 
MARRIAGE
Code:
· A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. 

· A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

lol
So true
I've got another decade before I get married.
 
AAP said:
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.


omg...this is so true.

and I remember the ones in college used to leave their "beauty trail" (a.k.a facial imprint of makeup) on my pillows the next morning.
the guys wore makeup where you went to school?? :worried:
 
It's funny right?

I love when reality is funny as hell.

WAIT.






































Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

Ok that's not funny.
:(
 
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