In a weird sticky spot/wwyd

[tryin2tone]

Thats just it. She's a teenager and her needs change at the drop of a hat ya know?

she wasnt concerned about him yesterday but in fairness no one thought things were very bad and her vacation in the keys had been ruined
she was really looking forward to this vacation with her dad

I feel really bad for her and wont really have anyway to even make up the vacation to her let alone the obvious inadequacy of what to do for her if he dies.

Theres some bad blood there that will make this all incredibly worse for her.

Her mind is on the vacation, and maybe she doesn't realize just how bad things are. Has anyone explained to her what could happen? If everyone is just telling her "oh he will be fine" and god forbid he does die, is she prepared for that? If it happens, and she's not expecting it, that could be damaging. I'm sorry for your situation, really do hope for the best outcome for you guys. I don't pray, but ill have my gma put in a word to the priests at her church, get you guys in prayer. :hoping for the best:

 

[smurf2]

Pretty rare for a young guy to die from pneumonia, isnt it?

 

[theoak01]

I think thats alot for her to handle alone,id say let her stay if you hop a plane and be there with her,she needs support,more than just his friends,thats my two pence

 

[SpyWizard]

yea, people put alot in seeing a person for the last time when death is close at hand... others say they have great memories of the way the person was although they didn't get to say "good bye" they are spared the horror of the setting that many are in when they are close to death..

IF she is unaware of how bad he is, let her stay for the vacation, you don't need to be the bad guy.. put it off on the inlaws as their fault and let her come home.. if he passes away it's still their fault not yours..

as for you calling his family, why did you have to do that?? r u going to make all the funeral arrangements and pay for it too? ?

not to be harsh, just pointing things out..

 

[shirlene29]

Pretty rare for a young guy to die from pneumonia, isnt it?

not so much with end stage liver failure...if that is in fact what it is...



and Im waiting on todays labs/scans ...I'm a subcontractor ..I work 7/365 its not so easy to call out of work
what sucks is its not like my job is particularly important in the grand scheme of things

and my husbands family is having a not so small health crisis so this could turn into me going to Fl while he goes to Ky

the whole thing is pretty fucked

 

[nefertiti]

I don't know what others have said, but I would highly recommend being completely up front with her about the severity of the situation, and then letting her make the call from there. I agree with you regarding the people wanting to keep things from her; while their hearts are in the right place, it's not the right thing to do. She's old enough to be treated like an adult on this matter. Best of luck to you, shirl....this is so tough, either way.

 

[shirlene29]

yea, people put alot in seeing a person for the last time when death is close at hand... others say they have great memories of the way the person was although they didn't get to say "good bye" they are spared the horror of the setting that many are in when they are close to death..

IF she is unaware of how bad he is, let her stay for the vacation, you don't need to be the bad guy.. put it off on the inlaws as their fault and let her come home.. if he passes away it's still their fault not yours..

as for you calling his family, why did you have to do that?? r u going to make all the funeral arrangements and pay for it too? ?

not to be harsh, just pointing things out..

i am listed as executor of his estate ...so yeah...if he dies the funeral arangments are on me

 

[shirlene29]

I don't know what others have said, but I would highly recommend being completely up front with her about the severity of the situation, and then letting her make the call from there. I agree with you regarding the people wanting to keep things from her; while their hearts are in the right place, it's not the right thing to do. She's old enough to be treated like an adult on this matter. Best of luck to you, shirl....this is so tough, either way.

she was made aware of things this morning and is with him now


so far the plans are as follows...a flight is booked for her tomorrow..if he recovers he wont be able to come up the coast again in time for her to get back in to school...
if she changes her mind after seeing him today well so be it.

if things do turn out to be very dire everyones trying to figure out scheduling so that I go down with her and my oldest daughter.

 

[nefertiti]

she was made aware of things this morning and is with him now


so far the plans are as follows...a flight is booked for her tomorrow..if he recovers he wont be able to come up the coast again in time for her to get back in to school...
if she changes her mind after seeing him today well so be it.

if things do turn out to be very dire everyones trying to figure out scheduling so that I go down with her and my oldest daughter.

I apologize if you already stated that in the thread....I think you have a reasonable game plan. As I said, my thoughts are with you. I can't imagine being in your shoes.

 

[shirlene29]

no...I hadnt said it yet...the plan was still up in the air a bit and firming up

no need to apologize