Dealing With A Girl I Slept With

[Caleb's Tree]

Ok..here goes. I had a few dates with this girl...and I do like her....and I am looking to find a GF for this summer...so have been window shopping..dating.

Ended up sleeping with a girl...who I think has her heart set on me and wants some sort of commitment. She's a little irritated with me right now. Went on a weekend with her...which was probably a mistake. Still like the girl...but don't know how to tell her we should slow down a bit....and I am interested in someone else...who imo...might be a better prospect.

So here is my question... Can you take sex off the table...and just "date" again? Is this even possible with a girl? I'm ready for a committed relationship again....just not sure if it should be with her.

 

[canadianhitman]

Easy solution: date the other girl some, continue to date the first girl. After a few weeks of direct comparison, there will be a clear favorite...at which point you commit to the favorite and dump the other one. Why take sex of the table? It doesn't mean you're committed if you're banging (some women seem to think so, but that's their problem).

 

[SpyWizard]

which one bakes a better pie??

 

[brownbrown]

Easy solution: date the other girl some, continue to date the first girl. After a few weeks of direct comparison, there will be a clear favorite...at which point you commit to the favorite and dump the other one. Why take sex of the table? It doesn't mean you're committed if you're banging (some women seem to think so, but that's their problem).

what he said.... test drive their company..... You dont have to buy every car you test drive....

 

[Caleb's Tree]

I think she is putting the pressure on me...because she wants to be in a relationship with me...but I am not totally ready to be in one with her. She told me that she gets emotionally attached to a man once she sleeps with him....so...ehh...thats a problem...because I have only known her three weeks, and we banged like rabid rabbits after the 2nd date. The other girl I am far more interested in, but she's the cautious type...so...don't think I am getting the goods for a while...but she'd totally be worth the wait.

So the dilemna is how to let this girl down gently so she doesn't go into a chic rage. Both these girls are Facebook friends of mine...which is probably another dumb assed move I made....but neither know about the other. Had it not been for Facebook, I'd be able to be more discreet....but the one chic wants to be in a relationship and post it all over Facebook. I said No, I am a private person, and don't publicize my private life like that.

 

[brownbrown]

I think she is putting the pressure on me...because she wants to be in a relationship with me...but I am not totally ready to be in one with her. She told me that she gets emotionally attached to a man once she sleeps with him....so...ehh...thats a problem...because I have only known her three weeks, and we banged like rabid rabbits after the 2nd date. The other girl I am far more interested in, but she's the cautious type...so...don't think I am getting the goods for a while...but she'd totally be worth the wait.

So the dilemna is how to let this girl down gently so she doesn't go into a chic rage. Both these girls are Facebook friends of mine...which is probably another dumb assed move I made....but neither know about the other. Had it not been for Facebook, I'd be able to be more discreet....but the one chic wants to be in a relationship and post it all over Facebook. I said No, I am a private person, and don't publicize my private life like that.

HOLY CRAP!!!! You gave FB to both??
Hard to dump a chic, especially after sex....
Are you sure the chic you want , wants you? Because if chic 1 is blasting your business on FB, chic 2 has prolly seen it and is keeping it as ammo.....
FACEBOOK and playing the field is No Good.....
change your privacy settings of FB if you want a snowball in hell chance of chic 2.

 

[Caleb's Tree]

HOLY CRAP!!!! You gave FB to both??
Hard to dump a chic, especially after sex....
Are you sure the chic you want , wants you? Because if chic 1 is blasting your business on FB, chic 2 has prolly seen it and is keeping it as ammo.....
FACEBOOK and playing the field is No Good.....
change your privacy settings of FB if you want a snowball in hell chance of chic 2.

No nothing has been publicized. She just wanted to tag some photos. I think I have it under control. Sh1t like this happens though. Buds of mine used to tell me about getting dates randomly off of Facebook. I never really thought much about it till I was getting hit up myself.

What I did have in place was more or less a rule not to let chics I was fooling around with on Facebook, but these girls these days all ask to be on your Facebook....and it's kinda unavoidable. They are persistent.

My privacy settings are already set to "Friends Only" So that is at least making the best of a not so ideal situation. Chic number 2..that I am hot for...well...we have a date Friday night. You should see this girl. Black hair, piercing blue eyes, 5'9". It's been on and off for about 2 and a half months. There was an Ex knuckleheaded BF of hers that was short circuiting the whole thing...and during that time, Chic1 came in the picture. So I walked away from Chic2. Then Chic2 cleaned up her issues, and hit me up again to start seeing her again. The runway is clear now...so I plan on coming in for a landing at some point. Totally gaga over Chic2, but Chic1 is a nice girl, with a good heart, pretty, and intelligent...so...want to do this right.

I actually have feelings...believe it or not....and really don't like hurting anyone. I'm looking for a graceful way to ease out of the situation with Chic1. Probably should have never slept with her...but sh1t happens..and I have a crazy sex drive...so no one is laying next to me for very long without getting that "bump" in the middle of the night. LOL

 

[CheapPinz]

In my opinion, it sounds like you're not interested in finding a life partner..just someone to spend some fun times with and have sex with. No problem with that as long as you're both on the same page. One question you might not have considered is: what if the second girl is more demanding than the first? If it was me, I'd be evaluating my partner based on attraction, openmindedness, and tolerance to non-traditional behavior. Find a girl that wants to be friends with benefits and I think you'll both be happy. Find a girl looking for her future husband, and you're going to have lots of drama.
I'd be straight up open and say "I don't want a committment right now. I like you, but I'm young and I want to have my freedom. If you want me to be honest, you'll have to respect my needs at this time in my life. If you want to change me, you either need to realize you cant change anyone or you need to move on." ...If you open your relationship like that, you can remind her of this, and she doesn't have a leg to stand on when the monogomy and committment conversation comes up. If you don't do the above, drama drama drama....

 

[brownbrown]

/\/\/\/\/ well said pinz... well said /\/\/\/\/\ Sounded like a "Love Line" call.... need i say.. Dr. Drew-ish...

 

[CoBra666]

date em both till it all blows up or ends in a 3some. if u can get to end of summer you doubled your goal

 

[peptide]

Cobra is probably right, seriously. You'll end up going with chick number 2, waiting all summer to hit it, and then she'll leave you for Mr Ex Boyfriend before you do. And your best friend will be smashing your girl number 1.

 

[Caleb's Tree]

Cobra is probably right, seriously. You'll end up going with chick number 2, waiting all summer to hit it, and then she'll leave you for Mr Ex Boyfriend before you do. And your best friend will be smashing your girl number 1.

Update on this.....I ended up having to give Chic # 1 the gentle let down. Wish I were more like a Neanderthal....and could just bone her and make her empty promises like some guys would do, but I couldn't do that....so...yah...you playahs...are gonna berate me for this....but I am putting all my eggs in one basket on girl number 2.

Seriously I am relieved. I was on a rampage anyways. I had two fuck buddies, with a 3rd and 4th offering, and was doing a lot of dating....some chics were young enough to be my daughthers. Seriously...the guilt started getting to me...and I thought...WTF...doing quite a bit of fornicating here...maybe I am damning my soul. LOL.

So if I get burnt trying to settle down on just one girl so be it. I can at least live with myself for the time being, and if I get shot down....it's easy to go back to dating....and random hookups "safely".

 

[CoBra666]

lol, whatever makes ya happy. for me although i have had a girl for a little while now, when im single its like a guilty pleasure to see what kind of vaginal following i can get before i get caught.

 

[brownbrown]

Update on this.....I ended up having to give Chic # 1 the gentle let down. Wish I were more like a Neanderthal....and could just bone her and make her empty promises like some guys would do, but I couldn't do that....so...yah...you playahs...are gonna berate me for this....but I am putting all my eggs in one basket on girl number 2.

Seriously I am relieved. I was on a rampage anyways. I had two fuck buddies, with a 3rd and 4th offering, and was doing a lot of dating....some chics were young enough to be my daughthers. Seriously...the guilt started getting to me...and I thought...WTF...doing quite a bit of fornicating here...maybe I am damning my soul. LOL.

So if I get burnt trying to settle down on just one girl so be it. I can at least live with myself for the time being, and if I get shot down....it's easy to go back to dating....and random hookups "safely".

lol, not gonna flame ya man... good luck....

 

[cuthroat]

pretend to commit to #1 have sex with her again but put it in her B; then say "just kidding, I dont want commitment" and move on to number to saying how number 1 used you like you were some sex object.

 

[Caleb's Tree]

Update. Guess I kinda screwed up. Chic number 2 ended up being flakey. She did a background check on me...which was cool...I get that. I spent a lot of time with her....only to find out she was the suspicious type and was going around asking friends and family for dirt on me. WTF? Dropped her like a hot potato. At least I am still on good terms with Chic number 1. Hopefully I will get back in her good graces. I think I am gonna go back to being a douchebag playah. All these chics are crazy anyways. Might as well have my fun.

Waste of my time trying to get with the hot chic....she was down with it...but...was pissing off all my friends. See yah. Hopefully Chic 1 lets me back in her pants again.

 

[CoBra666]

thats my boy

 

[Caleb's Tree]

thats my boy

Thing is...I really don't like being a playah...but these crazy azzed biatches force you too...cause they play F'n games with dudes all the time.....so I might as well use them...like they use us.

 

[CoBra666]

ithink ur looki at it all wrong. just dont look at anything seriously. just do ur thing, meet chicks hang out fuck, fuck em all. when something special happens it will happen. until then just hang out wit yo wang out

 

[hunter121]

Thanks for your information

 

[Caleb's Tree]

ithink ur looki at it all wrong. just dont look at anything seriously. just do ur thing, meet chicks hang out fuck, fuck em all. when something special happens it will happen. until then just hang out wit yo wang out

Dude...you are totally right. I got hung up on this chic...most likely because of her playboy bunny looks. When I think about her...she was shallow....had little substance...and not much personality.

She seemed to just get by on her looks....and probably using guys quite a bit. So...that taught me a lesson. I'm just out to get laid...till something comes along that is worth it.

 

[CoBra666]

yeh man just drift in the wind. take lots of naps and let life fall in your lap. no point in forcing things to be something when the things really arent what they should be

 

[CoBra666]

drinking alot helps too

 

[Caleb's Tree]

drinking alot helps too

Yes.....beer good!

Benjamin Franklin said..."Beer is good and proof God wants us to be happy."

He also said.... "Fuck Bitches...Get Money!"

 

[Sub-Zero]

Ok..here goes. I had a few dates with this girl...and I do like her....and I am looking to find a GF for this summer...so have been window shopping..dating.

Ended up sleeping with a girl...who I think has her heart set on me and wants some sort of commitment. She's a little irritated with me right now. Went on a weekend with her...which was probably a mistake. Still like the girl...but don't know how to tell her we should slow down a bit....and I am interested in someone else...who imo...might be a better prospect.

So here is my question... Can you take sex off the table...and just "date" again? Is this even possible with a girl? I'm ready for a committed relationship again....just not sure if it should be with her.

dont compromise. if the tables were turned she would be selfish and lead you on.

just be honest and say "i do not want to enter an exclusive relationship with you at this time but i still enjoy your company and like hanging out with you". and leave it at that. and do your thing.

she only wants you bad because you are the best thign on her plate right now, and she will use any methods and tactics to try and make you think you are supposed to settle on her, so that she can have you. chances are she will probably be a cunt, in general, to be in a relationship with