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..... to figure out in ten minutes or less what the President is talking about. The objective of this test is to rearrange all the words in proper sequence, order, and grammatical structure. Extra credit will be give to those proposing a well thought out title to the quote since President Bush never revealed what the subject matter was..
Below is a direct quote from the President. This is not a joke. This quote is not fabricated. This is a direct quote.
You will be penalized for improper use of verbs, nouns, adjectives, adverbs and pronouns. Sentence fragments are not allowed. Words only in the official American Heritage Dictionary can be used.
If by chance you agree that it is impossible to make any sense of the Presidents words just write across the paragraph in big letters, the words, “UNINTELLIGIBLE” or “MAKES NO SENSE”. Also, please write a paragraph of 50 words or less explaining why you think the President himself should enroll in the “No Child Left Behind” program; or should we call it “No President Left Behind”.
O.K. You have ten minutes. Here is President Bush’s quote:
THE PRESIDENT: "Because the -- all which is on the table begins to address the big cost drivers. For example, how benefits are calculate, for example, is on the table; whether or not benefits rise based upon wage increases or price increases. There's a series of parts of the formula that are being considered. And when you couple that, those different cost drivers, affecting those -- changing those with personal accounts, the idea is to get what has been promised more likely to be -- or closer delivered to what has been promised.
Does that make any sense to you? It's kind of muddled. Look, there's a series of things that cause the -- like, for example, benefits are calculated based upon the increase of wages, as opposed to the increase of prices. Some have suggested that we calculate -- the benefits will rise based upon inflation, as opposed to wage increases. There is a reform that would help solve the red if that were put into effect. In other words, how fast benefits grow, how fast the promised benefits grow, if those -- if that growth is affected, it will help on the red.
Okay, better? I'll keep working on it." END OF QUOTE.
Note: Additional credit for answering the following multiple choice correctly:
President Bush is trying to explain which of the following:
1.How to set a table for dinner
2.A Formula One racing car strategy for NASCAR drivers.
3.How to pick a wood driver that doesn’t cost much for playing golf.
4.A comparison of cost drivers car drivers, and personal accounts.
5.The difference between the words “promise” and “promoted”.
6.All of the none above or none of the all above.
President Bush believes:
1.Things that make no sense, which he doesn’t say, are muddled.
2.Benefits are wages based upon prices, but prices increase as calculations inflate.
3.If red is put into effect, reform will turn red into benefits that will grow fast until promised.
4.If benefits grow faster than red, growth will outgrow red faster than affect.
President Bush’s conclusion is:
1.Work is hard.
2.Hard work should not result in benefits because that will create red and red is not good.
3.He is willing to spend $2 trillion to get rid of red but has no plan..
4.Old people are more trouble than they are worth.
5.He is sorry he ever brought up the question of Social Security.
In spite of what President Bush says, which of the following is true:
1.Between 55 million and 70 (mainly working) million Americans have no health insurance.
2.Nine million Americans are unemployed; 11 million are long term unemployed.
3.In 4 years Bush took a $500 billion surplus and magically turned it into a $500 deficit---a $1 trillion difference.
4.Bush has asked for over $300 billion to liberate Afghanistan and Iraq. Unchallenged by Congress and the Senate he has asked for $89 billion, $25 billion, and $82 billion for the war in Iraq. He is spending $1.2 billion a week.
5.When Bush said “Mission Accomplished” he was technically correct because he never revealed what Mission he was talking about and never defined what he meant by the word Accomplished. So Kerry is a flip-flopper.
6.1500 Americans have been killed in Iraq along with over 100,000 Iraqi citizens (men, women and children).
7.All of the above.
Which of the following is part of the Presidents first term, four-year legacy:
1.More than 6 million American declared bankruptcy during the last 4 years due mainly to crushing medical bills, loss of jobs, catastrophic illnesses with no medical insurance, and divorce. Just a few weeks ago Congress passed a bankruptcy law crushing the “last hope” of desperate people at the “end of their rope”.
2.The minimum wage is $5.15 an hour and the President thinks that is good because it provides families with an income of over $10,000 a year. He is anxious to sign this bill soon locking it into place because Americans like “work hard.”
3.Gas is almost $2.25 a gallon and this is good because it proves how valuable gas is The thinks the answer is for everyone in American to buy a Black and Decker drill and go up to Alaska and drill into the ground for oil.
4.Peace, liberty and freedom are breaking out in the Middle East and it has been breaking out in the Middle East for over 2000 years now.
5.Answers 1, 2, 3 4 and 5.
When President Bush goes to Church on Sunday which group does he pray for the most?
1.The tens of millions of people making minimum wage of $5.15 an hour ($10,000) a year.
2.The 6 million people (in 4 years) that suffered crushing financial hardship and declared bankruptcy.
3.The almost 70 million people with no health insurance and no access to medical care.
4.The 1500 soldiers that he refers to with the euphemism, “fallen heroes”
5.The CEO’s of the Fortune 500 (especially the drug and health insurance CEO’s) so that they may have an especially good quarterly performance and receive lucrative bonuses.
Himself.
Why does President Bush go to Sunday church services and carry a Bible?
1.It guarantees the Nightly News lead story will show him going to Church carrying a Bible.
2.He likes to memorize verses from Matthew, Mark, Luke and John since he has already mastered the intricacies of Social Security; taxes; trade deficits; Treasury securities; world wide energy problems; the $2.5 trillion Federal Budget; and macro-economic theory.
3.Karl Rove told him to go to Church and carry a Bible.
4.He feels close to Jesus because both Jesus and Bush spent their lives helping the poor, the sick, the hungry, the downtrodden, the falsely imprisoned, and the illiterate.
5.A 15 second photo op of the President going to Church, carrying a Bible that appears on the Nightly News on ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, MSNBC and Fox guarantees the President an automatic 30 million votes from people who wouldn’t dare vote against a “person of faith” out of fear of missing “the rapture” and incurring the wrath of God
Below is a direct quote from the President. This is not a joke. This quote is not fabricated. This is a direct quote.
You will be penalized for improper use of verbs, nouns, adjectives, adverbs and pronouns. Sentence fragments are not allowed. Words only in the official American Heritage Dictionary can be used.
If by chance you agree that it is impossible to make any sense of the Presidents words just write across the paragraph in big letters, the words, “UNINTELLIGIBLE” or “MAKES NO SENSE”. Also, please write a paragraph of 50 words or less explaining why you think the President himself should enroll in the “No Child Left Behind” program; or should we call it “No President Left Behind”.
O.K. You have ten minutes. Here is President Bush’s quote:
THE PRESIDENT: "Because the -- all which is on the table begins to address the big cost drivers. For example, how benefits are calculate, for example, is on the table; whether or not benefits rise based upon wage increases or price increases. There's a series of parts of the formula that are being considered. And when you couple that, those different cost drivers, affecting those -- changing those with personal accounts, the idea is to get what has been promised more likely to be -- or closer delivered to what has been promised.
Does that make any sense to you? It's kind of muddled. Look, there's a series of things that cause the -- like, for example, benefits are calculated based upon the increase of wages, as opposed to the increase of prices. Some have suggested that we calculate -- the benefits will rise based upon inflation, as opposed to wage increases. There is a reform that would help solve the red if that were put into effect. In other words, how fast benefits grow, how fast the promised benefits grow, if those -- if that growth is affected, it will help on the red.
Okay, better? I'll keep working on it." END OF QUOTE.
Note: Additional credit for answering the following multiple choice correctly:
President Bush is trying to explain which of the following:
1.How to set a table for dinner
2.A Formula One racing car strategy for NASCAR drivers.
3.How to pick a wood driver that doesn’t cost much for playing golf.
4.A comparison of cost drivers car drivers, and personal accounts.
5.The difference between the words “promise” and “promoted”.
6.All of the none above or none of the all above.
President Bush believes:
1.Things that make no sense, which he doesn’t say, are muddled.
2.Benefits are wages based upon prices, but prices increase as calculations inflate.
3.If red is put into effect, reform will turn red into benefits that will grow fast until promised.
4.If benefits grow faster than red, growth will outgrow red faster than affect.
President Bush’s conclusion is:
1.Work is hard.
2.Hard work should not result in benefits because that will create red and red is not good.
3.He is willing to spend $2 trillion to get rid of red but has no plan..
4.Old people are more trouble than they are worth.
5.He is sorry he ever brought up the question of Social Security.
In spite of what President Bush says, which of the following is true:
1.Between 55 million and 70 (mainly working) million Americans have no health insurance.
2.Nine million Americans are unemployed; 11 million are long term unemployed.
3.In 4 years Bush took a $500 billion surplus and magically turned it into a $500 deficit---a $1 trillion difference.
4.Bush has asked for over $300 billion to liberate Afghanistan and Iraq. Unchallenged by Congress and the Senate he has asked for $89 billion, $25 billion, and $82 billion for the war in Iraq. He is spending $1.2 billion a week.
5.When Bush said “Mission Accomplished” he was technically correct because he never revealed what Mission he was talking about and never defined what he meant by the word Accomplished. So Kerry is a flip-flopper.
6.1500 Americans have been killed in Iraq along with over 100,000 Iraqi citizens (men, women and children).
7.All of the above.
Which of the following is part of the Presidents first term, four-year legacy:
1.More than 6 million American declared bankruptcy during the last 4 years due mainly to crushing medical bills, loss of jobs, catastrophic illnesses with no medical insurance, and divorce. Just a few weeks ago Congress passed a bankruptcy law crushing the “last hope” of desperate people at the “end of their rope”.
2.The minimum wage is $5.15 an hour and the President thinks that is good because it provides families with an income of over $10,000 a year. He is anxious to sign this bill soon locking it into place because Americans like “work hard.”
3.Gas is almost $2.25 a gallon and this is good because it proves how valuable gas is The thinks the answer is for everyone in American to buy a Black and Decker drill and go up to Alaska and drill into the ground for oil.
4.Peace, liberty and freedom are breaking out in the Middle East and it has been breaking out in the Middle East for over 2000 years now.
5.Answers 1, 2, 3 4 and 5.
When President Bush goes to Church on Sunday which group does he pray for the most?
1.The tens of millions of people making minimum wage of $5.15 an hour ($10,000) a year.
2.The 6 million people (in 4 years) that suffered crushing financial hardship and declared bankruptcy.
3.The almost 70 million people with no health insurance and no access to medical care.
4.The 1500 soldiers that he refers to with the euphemism, “fallen heroes”
5.The CEO’s of the Fortune 500 (especially the drug and health insurance CEO’s) so that they may have an especially good quarterly performance and receive lucrative bonuses.
Himself.
Why does President Bush go to Sunday church services and carry a Bible?
1.It guarantees the Nightly News lead story will show him going to Church carrying a Bible.
2.He likes to memorize verses from Matthew, Mark, Luke and John since he has already mastered the intricacies of Social Security; taxes; trade deficits; Treasury securities; world wide energy problems; the $2.5 trillion Federal Budget; and macro-economic theory.
3.Karl Rove told him to go to Church and carry a Bible.
4.He feels close to Jesus because both Jesus and Bush spent their lives helping the poor, the sick, the hungry, the downtrodden, the falsely imprisoned, and the illiterate.
5.A 15 second photo op of the President going to Church, carrying a Bible that appears on the Nightly News on ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, MSNBC and Fox guarantees the President an automatic 30 million votes from people who wouldn’t dare vote against a “person of faith” out of fear of missing “the rapture” and incurring the wrath of God
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