What's wrong with this email?

[Werd]

Hi *Insert my name here*,

OK here's a good one that I had last Friday...

Don't ya hate in when you go on a date and you get there and you realize that the pictures that you were attracted to on someone's profile was taken like 10 years and 30 pounds ago.... It's like the 3rd time this has happend to me now... Uhggggg....
Why Why Why do people do that....???
I'm mean this chicks butt was the size of Uranus.... I mean it's probably got it's own weather system I mean it's probably expanding faster that the universe is... What's up with that.... So we go out to din din and she scarfs down this humongus steak and garlic potatoes and them a big fat peice of cheesecake to boot. And I'm thinkin' jeeze lady the last thing you need is another piece of cheesecake. Hey why don't ya just smear it on your hips with the rest of your cheese collection.... So then we go to see 50 First dates and she eats just about all the freakin' popcorn and she couldn't keep her hands off my Maltballs... And she didn't even offer me any of her Milk Duds so I say how are those Milk Duds ya got there. And she goes do ya want some. And I'm like yeah. So she goes here, and I put hand out and wouldn't ya know it, one freakin Dud and it was all melted and smushed cuz she was sittin on the damn box... Uhggg.... So now the movie's over and she goes let's g o back to her apartment for a cup of Joe... So we get there and she like Oh shoot I'm out of coffee... And then I realize what she really wants is to get me on her love seat... So I'm thinking Oh great I've kiss ol garlic face so as not to hurt her feelings... Thank god love seats are actually to small to make love on or I think I would have been crushed to death... So that was my night....
ANYWAY

So chica whatcha got on your agenda for the weekend.. smothing FUN....???

Hope to here from ya,
PEace

*Guys' name here*


*******


Seriously, what would you guys think? I'll tell you guys my reply in a bit.

 

[Deterass]

 

[jerkbox]

it's pretty damn funny....that's what I think....lol

 

[FreeballinDC]

Hi *Insert my name here*,

OK here's a good one that I had last Friday...

Don't ya hate in when you go on a date and you get there and you realize that the pictures that you were attracted to on someone's profile was taken like 10 years and 30 pounds ago.... It's like the 3rd time this has happend to me now... Uhggggg....
Why Why Why do people do that....???
I'm mean this chicks butt was the size of Uranus.... I mean it's probably got it's own weather system I mean it's probably expanding faster that the universe is... What's up with that.... So we go out to din din and she scarfs down this humongus steak and garlic potatoes and them a big fat peice of cheesecake to boot. And I'm thinkin' jeeze lady the last thing you need is another piece of cheesecake. Hey why don't ya just smear it on your hips with the rest of your cheese collection.... So then we go to see 50 First dates and she eats just about all the freakin' popcorn and she couldn't keep her hands off my Maltballs... And she didn't even offer me any of her Milk Duds so I say how are those Milk Duds ya got there. And she goes do ya want some. And I'm like yeah. So she goes here, and I put hand out and wouldn't ya know it, one freakin Dud and it was all melted and smushed cuz she was sittin on the damn box... Uhggg.... So now the movie's over and she goes let's g o back to her apartment for a cup of Joe... So we get there and she like Oh shoot I'm out of coffee... And then I realize what she really wants is to get me on her love seat... So I'm thinking Oh great I've kiss ol garlic face so as not to hurt her feelings... Thank god love seats are actually to small to make love on or I think I would have been crushed to death... So that was my night....
ANYWAY

So chica whatcha got on your agenda for the weekend.. smothing FUN....???

Hope to here from ya,
PEace

*Guys' name here*


*******


Seriously, what would you guys think? I'll tell you guys my reply in a bit.

Like, OMG, it was the like, date from like, hell!

Tell him to ditch the bitch and make the switch.

 

[the nature boy]

it's missing the part about putting her head in the toilet.

 

[Dial_tone]

so he didn't even get a BJ out of the deal?

 

[Becoming]

JH1 there is the give-a-fuck-o-meter you have been looking for...

that was a long boring email, that is what I would tell him...

 

[WODIN]

Someone thinks you have a fat ass.

 

[Werd]

LOL

He was asking me about my dating experiences through the site. I wrote him a two line email. Above was his reply.

I answered that yes, similar experiences had happened to me and I do not understand why someone would put up a pic that no longer resembled them (I get asked by most men if I *really* look like my pics - which annoys the hell out of me - I don't go out with those guys.).

But I asked him that if this was the date from hell, then why did he follow her to her apartment?

Somehow I don't think that I will be getting a reply. LOL

 

[DocHoliday]

JH1 there is the give-a-fuck-o-meter you have been looking for...

that was a long boring email, that is what I would tell him...

WIB


me shooting the sender of long boring emails----->

 

[from zero]

LOL

He was asking me about my dating experiences through the site. I wrote him a two line email. Above was his reply.

I answered that yes, similar experiences had happened to me and I do not understand why someone would put up a pic that no longer resembled them (I get asked by most men if I *really* look like my pics - which annoys the hell out of me - I don't go out with those guys.).

But I asked him that if this was the date from hell, then why did he follow her to her apartment?

Somehow I don't think that I will be getting a reply. LOL

That's your big secret reply?

Thank you so much for the suspense, Hitchcock.

 

[SoreArms]

post your pic

 

[onebigab]

Hi *Insert my name here*,

OK here's a good one that I had last Friday...

Don't ya hate in when you go on a date and you get there and you realize that the pictures that you were attracted to on someone's profile was taken like 10 years and 30 pounds ago.... It's like the 3rd time this has happend to me now... Uhggggg....
Why Why Why do people do that....???
I'm mean this chicks butt was the size of Uranus.... I mean it's probably got it's own weather system I mean it's probably expanding faster that the universe is... What's up with that.... So we go out to din din and she scarfs down this humongus steak and garlic potatoes and them a big fat peice of cheesecake to boot. And I'm thinkin' jeeze lady the last thing you need is another piece of cheesecake. Hey why don't ya just smear it on your hips with the rest of your cheese collection.... So then we go to see 50 First dates and she eats just about all the freakin' popcorn and she couldn't keep her hands off my Maltballs... And she didn't even offer me any of her Milk Duds so I say how are those Milk Duds ya got there. And she goes do ya want some. And I'm like yeah. So she goes here, and I put hand out and wouldn't ya know it, one freakin Dud and it was all melted and smushed cuz she was sittin on the damn box... Uhggg.... So now the movie's over and she goes let's g o back to her apartment for a cup of Joe... So we get there and she like Oh shoot I'm out of coffee... And then I realize what she really wants is to get me on her love seat... So I'm thinking Oh great I've kiss ol garlic face so as not to hurt her feelings... Thank god love seats are actually to small to make love on or I think I would have been crushed to death... So that was my night....
ANYWAY

So chica whatcha got on your agenda for the weekend.. smothing FUN....???

Hope to here from ya,
PEace

*Guys' name here*


*******


Seriously, what would you guys think? I'll tell you guys my reply in a bit.

So what your really trying to say is that your date didn't go well.

 

[Werd]

No big secret sillies...

I am truly surprized that none of you picked up on how much of an ASS this guy really is (aside from the long stoopid email).

He admitted that he is a class A Jackass. He writes this big long stoopid email about what a freaking fatass ugly no class chick this was and ends it by admitting that he still followed her up to her apartment (as if it wasn't obvious to someone with half a brain... why would you agree to continue a date in someone's apartment if it was a disaster?) in the hopes of getting laid..... something every girl wants to hear when a guy is introducing himself to her.

This is why I like meeting people online - the imbeciles give themselves up really quickly - no need to even invest in a date before you realize what a freaking loser someone is.

For those who got bored and didn't read the whole email (I know I was) - the dude wasn't talking about a date with me. (That will never happen.) He was introducing his rapier wit and charm by retelling his dating experience from last Friday night.

 

[Werd]

T-bone and Biteme have both seen my profile and pics (Dialtone, BigDawg, SuperQT, Velvett, Raina and a few others have seen my pics).... I ain't all that, but I am certainly better than a finger in your eye. And Matt... I am just a tad bit better than falling down the stairs.

 

[MattTheSkywalker]

loser.

all the way.

 

[Becoming]

I ain't all that, but I am certainly better than a finger in your eye. And Matt... I am just a tad bit better than falling down the stairs.

hey now, some of us LIKE a finger in the eye....

(I hear jerkbox and FZ like to stick them in each others-you-know-where...)

 

[Dial_tone]

T-bone and Biteme have both seen my profile and pics (Dialtone, BigDawg, SuperQT, Velvett, Raina and a few others have seen my pics).... I ain't all that, but I am certainly better than a finger in your eye.

I've been groveling for some werd crumbs since I first laid eyes on her (actually before that) but to no avail. I figured the fact that the guy was an ass was so obvious it wasn't worth a mention.

 

[Werd]

LOL you guys are too funny!

Dialtone, Sugar... you know I have a whollelotta luv just for you.

*kiss*

 

[MattTheSkywalker]

I've been groveling for some werd crumbs since I first laid eyes on her (actually before that) but to no avail. I figured the fact that the guy was an ass was so obvious it wasn't worth a mention.

Yeah but you grovel for crumbs from every woman here, and some of the guys.

 

[Dial_tone]

This is quite true, however werd is definitely a top 5 grovelee.

 

[Werd]

Lol

 

[vinylgroover]

Anyonewho calls a 40 yo woman 'chica' is a tool.