What would you do?

[jerseyart]

Got a present from my ex. Been broken up a year this month. In ten years together I received a Christmas present from her the first year, and not a single one of note afterwards.

So when we first started dating I had a watch that was given to me as a present from an ex I knew just before her. It irritated her, so I agreed to get rid of it. So this year she buys me a watch as nice as the one I had abandoned when we started dating. Totally hit me out of the blue, and it was such a kind gesture (she has been asking for a second chance) I don't have the heart to return the thing, nor am I certain I would want to anyway. She's trying so damn hard, it makes it tough.

So Im thinking of buying her something today, cause I hadn't purchased anything for her, and inviting her to my families house for Christmas, since I know she doesnt have anywhere else to go. She hinted at it without ever outright asking for an invite, and family functions were another thing she never wish to do.

Leave the past alone? Open up a can of worms and see what happens?

 

[The Shadow]

...why not carry a fuck buddy instead?

 

[biteme]

If she's one of the ones that tried to kill you, not only no, but hell no! I'd never forgive that. I'm assuming that she's not.

 

[GoldenDelicious]

if i were as old and flabby as you are, i would probably open the can of worms

 

[jerseyart]

If she's one of the ones that tried to kill you, not only no, but hell no! I'd never forgive that. I'm assuming that she's not.

LOL

No she is. She has issues, but shes getting better

Shes been diagnosed bi polar, which is something I was never aware of when we were dating. She's intelligent and was able to mask a great deal, and frankly I never knew enough about the disorder to put it all together.

It was when she was drinking that things could get nasty, and we both spent a lot of time clubbing. believe me Im hesitant as well. Took me a long time to get over her, and now shes ingratiatiing herself back in my life with perfect timing

 

[GoldenDelicious]

anyway in all seriousness, if youre not feeling pity for her, and can get over her being with other men etc in the past, id probably give her another try.

im a spiteful bastard though, i cant get over the other men, so i never ever go back.

 

[Pamela]

LOL

No she is. She has issues, but shes getting better

Shes been diagnosed bi polar, which is something I was never aware of when we were dating. She's intelligent and was able to mask a great deal, and frankly I never knew enough about the disorder to put it all together.

It was when she was drinking that things could get nasty, and we both spent a lot of time clubbing. believe me Im hesitant as well. Took me a long time to get over her, and now shes ingratiatiing herself back in my life with perfect timing

Sex had to be good.

Sounds like a can of worms..

 

[biteme]

It's the holidays, she's lonely, the highest rate of suicide is during the holidays. Maybe you're a little lonely too because it's the holidays and you miss sharing them with someone? If it were me though, I'd steer clear of her, unless she's really changed, but how are you gonna know? A knife in the back is a little too late.

 

[biteme]

anyway in all seriousness, if youre not feeling pity for her, and can get over her being with other men etc in the past, id probably give her another try.

im a spiteful bastard though, i cant get over the other men, so i never ever go back.

Pussy.

 

[Buddy_Christ]

hmmm, well, here's my suggestion. if the sex was good, then take her along as you know you'll get some. don't be nice to her in bed though, treat her like a $2 whore with ATM transactions, donkey punches, dirty sanchez, and don't forget to give her some prison sex. if she can tolerate all of that, glue her eyes shut with your man load. if she still sticks around, propose on the spot and just make sure she continues to take her medication.

 

[coverguy]

better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all!

 

[biteme]

better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all!

Only if you survive it. LOL

 

[The_Ghost]

Only if you survive it. LOL

You can always survive bro!

 

[GoldenDelicious]

better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all!

bullshit

tell me that when youre the one hearing it, its total, complete, mindnumbing, meaningless bullshit

fucken hate that phrase

 

[Buddy_Christ]

bullshit

tell me that when youre the one hearing it, its total, complete, mindnumbing, meaningless bullshit

fucken hate that phrase

very true. sometimes a relationship ends so horribly that you look back on it and can not find one bit of good that occurred. when the bad things that happened overshadow the good things, then the "it's better to have loved and lost" crap goes right out the window.

 

[Mr. Black]

Have sex with her then decide

 

[EnderJE]

So, let me get this straight. She's the one who tried or was thinking of hurting you...and you're thinking of fucking her?

I'd say to leave it alone and hire a hooker instead. Could be cheaper and safer in the long run.

 

[The_Ghost]

bullshit

tell me that when youre the one hearing it, its total, complete, mindnumbing, meaningless bullshit

fucken hate that phrase

not bullshit, i am living it in the worst possible way and i have no regrets!!

 

[rao740]

i agree with shadow fuck buddies but u will open a huge can of worms but itis ur choice u know what she is all about and the present thing a nice card will do don't waste the cash

 

[biteme]

i agree with shadow fuck buddies but u will open a huge can of worms but itis ur choice u know what she is all about and the present thing a nice card will do don't waste the cash

She already tried to kill him. I wouldn't go anywhere near her.

 

[awittyusername]

I would say politely give the watch back and wish her a Merry Christmas. I say this bc in the past I always gave in when ex bought me the gift and then the guilt for not being w/her on holidays etc. First, everything was perfect. Then, everthing went back to normal.

BTW. I don't buy this Bi-polar shit with hot chicks. My ex's family finally made her go to the DR. And, he diagnosed her with it. But, the only time she was depressed or went crazy was when she didn't get her way. If I was the Dr. I would have diagnosed her with being a rich spoiled bitch who had everything given to ehr bc she was hot.

 

[biteme]

I would say politely give the watch back and wish her a Merry Christmas. I say this bc in the past I always gave in when ex bought me the gift and then the guilt for not being w/her on holidays etc. First, everything was perfect. Then, everthing went back to normal.

BTW. I don't buy this Bi-polar shit with hot chicks. My ex's family finally made her go to the DR. And, he diagnosed her with it. But, the only time she was depressed or went crazy was when she didn't get her way. If I was the Dr. I would have diagnosed her with being a rich spoiled bitch who had everything given to ehr bc she was hot.

I wonder how many people get bogus diagnosis when the real problem is that they are just immature, childish assholes. LOL

 

[EnderJE]

I wonder how many people get bogus diagnosis when the real problem is that they are just immature, childish assholes. LOL

Hey now. Bipolar disorder got me out of alot of hawt water in my youth. If I ran into any problems, then I would just claim it.

 

[biteme]

What is it doc, bi-polar? Psychosis? "Well no, you're son is just a selfish prick that never got his ass kicked when he needed it." LOL

 

[coverguy]

bullshit

tell me that when youre the one hearing it, its total, complete, mindnumbing, meaningless bullshit

fucken hate that phrase

i've heard it bro. i'm not talking about meaningless flings or girls that you are just dating ... i'm talking about a relationship where you are in love with the other person. even if it ends horribly (and believe me, i've been there) you still end up getting so much out of the relationship that it is worth it. i wouldn't trade any of my past heartbreaks just to have alleviated myself from the pain.

 

[MattTheSkywalker]

10 years is a long time.

we should never be quick to dismiss people who think we are great

 

[TC2]

I would say politely give the watch back and wish her a Merry Christmas. I say this bc in the past I always gave in when ex bought me the gift and then the guilt for not being w/her on holidays etc. First, everything was perfect. Then, everthing went back to normal.

BTW. I don't buy this Bi-polar shit with hot chicks. My ex's family finally made her go to the DR. And, he diagnosed her with it. But, the only time she was depressed or went crazy was when she didn't get her way. If I was the Dr. I would have diagnosed her with being a rich spoiled bitch who had everything given to ehr bc she was hot.

Yeah no shit...every time someone acts like that (usually a woman) they're "bi-polar".

 

[BradG]

Who's to say you have to devote all your attention to her? Can you not see where things go with her without being with her soley? That will give you time to be able to judge if she's really changed/changing while still looking for better opportunities.

 

[gonelifting]

I agree that 10 years is forever. Don't have any regrets. You can always break up again if it does'nt work out.

 

[biteme]

You people are missing the point. She tried to kill him! Can any of you say that you would honestly go back to a person who did that. She's is a fucked up psycho. If you say yes, then you get what you deserve. No fucking way for me.

 

[BradG]

Yes, I would, depending on the circumstance. If she were just a bitch who didn't care about people that's one thing but if she has a psycologial disorder it's another.

 

[wutangnomo]

You need to fuck her while wearing that fancy watch. Then nicely tell her you're gay. I don't think she'll want the watch back after that.

 

[biteme]

Yes, I would, depending on the circumstance. If she were just a bitch who didn't care about people that's one thing but if she has a psycologial disorder it's another.

Even after a woman attempted to kill you, you would give her another chance? Damn, you people don't value your lives much.

 

[jerseyart]

Let me just clarify the "kill me " stuff. She tried to kill both of us by grabbing the wheel and trying to run us off the road. Im not minimizing it believe me. It was 4am, just otu fo the clubs, and she was emotional and a lil trashed with alcohol.

The bi polar stuff isnt a convenient excuse. It was visible in her in a lot fo ways. When the depression hit, it was like she was a different person altogether, especially if shed been drinking while we were out (she didnt do it at home, or alone, but when we partied). Shesnot analcoholic, and could go months without a drink and without complaint.

I did buy her something, but Im not going to rush either. The good was really good, and the bad was really bad. No in betweens with this girl

 

[Lestat]

Do you have any interest in a relationship with her? Any type..friendship.. dating.. if so then, sure, invite her over, get her a gift. But set her expectations now. She may see your reciprocation as interest in trying things again. She may see it as you giving her that second chance she wants. If that is not your intention, then make that clear so that she doesn't get her hopes up.

 

[jerseyart]

Thanks all

Thanks GL for the great k message. Exactly how I feel about it all

 

[Ulcasterdropout]

I'd send it back in pieces in a box with a dead skunk...but I hate people

better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all!

Who says, fuckface!?! j/k
It's debatable