What Mom taught me

[AAP]

WHY MOMS ARE SO GREAT



MOM TAUGHT ME TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE
"If you're going to kill each other, do it
outside, I just finished cleaning!"

MOM TAUGHT ME RELIGION
"You better pray that will come out of that carpet!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT TIME TRAVEL
"If you don't straighten up, I'll knock you into nextweek!"

MOM TAUGHT ME LOGIC
"Because I said so, that's why!"

MOM TAUGHT ME FORESIGHT
"Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an
accident."

MOM TAUGHT ME IRONY
"Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT CONTORTIONISM
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck?"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT STAMINA
"You'll sit there until all those peas are gone!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT WEATHER
"It looks like a tornado went through your room!"

MOM TAUGHT ME HOW TO SOLVE PHYSICS PROBLEMS
"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would
you listen
then?"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT HYPOCRISY
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times-don't
exaggerate!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION
"Stop acting like your father!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT ENVY
"There are millions of less fortunate kids in this world who
don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

And most of all.....

MOM TAUGHT ME THE CIRCLE OF LIFE
"I brought you into this world, I can take you out!"
Dan Keller

 

[Big Brother Val]

WHY MOMS ARE SO GREAT



MOM TAUGHT ME TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE
"If you're going to kill each other, do it
outside, I just finished cleaning!"

MOM TAUGHT ME RELIGION
"You better pray that will come out of that carpet!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT TIME TRAVEL
"If you don't straighten up, I'll knock you into nextweek!"

MOM TAUGHT ME LOGIC
"Because I said so, that's why!"

MOM TAUGHT ME FORESIGHT
"Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an
accident."

MOM TAUGHT ME IRONY
"Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT CONTORTIONISM
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck?"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT STAMINA
"You'll sit there until all those peas are gone!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT WEATHER
"It looks like a tornado went through your room!"

MOM TAUGHT ME HOW TO SOLVE PHYSICS PROBLEMS
"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would
you listen
then?"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT HYPOCRISY
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times-don't
exaggerate!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION
"Stop acting like your father!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT ENVY
"There are millions of less fortunate kids in this world who
don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

And most of all.....

MOM TAUGHT ME THE CIRCLE OF LIFE
"I brought you into this world, I can take you out!"
Dan Keller

Why is it that pretty much everyone can relate to this, because their mother's said things that are either EXACTLY like it, or at least REALLY CLOSE to the same statements made here?

Did they teach that at Mom School back in the day or what?

 

[rnch]

More Mom Words:

IF WISHES WERE HORSES BEGGARS MIGHT RIDE

BE CAREFULL OF WHAT YOU WISH FOR YOUNG MAN, YOU JUST MIGHT GET IT!!

THIS TOO SHALL PASS

FROM YOUR MOUTH TO GOD'S EARS

ONE DAY I HOPE YOU HAVE A SON JUST LIKE YOU!

 

[supersizeme]

"You're the reason Mommy drinks!!"

 

[Testosterone boy]

Hate to rain on everyones parade but my mom never said one of those things. She was/is pretty cool.

Makes it hard for girls to compare favorably when they demonstrate chronic cranial short circuits.

 

[rnch]

"You're the reason Mommy drinks!!"

reminds me of an old quote from W.C. Fields, a wife/child hating comedian from the 1930's......."ah yes, my wife, she drove me to drink, and i'll always thank her for that!"

 

[WODIN]

"If I catch you I am going to beat the hell out of you!"

--- Mom thought I was possessed....

 

[Pamela]

Never tell your Mom she will not whip you!!!
Cause she will....

 

[Bigsatan13]

My Mom Taught me:
That wooden spoons and belts had other purposes.(I deserved worse)

I havent seen my mother since my daughter was born. We go to the same house, there is a woman that looks like her, but it's not my mother.

 

[Bikini Mod]

"Wait till your father gets home." Was REALLY popular in my house growing up. I can honestly say that I have never EVER said that. If my girls mess up they know that their father was and always will be right in line BEHIND ME! LOL

 

[vixenbabe]

My mom's famous line when I was being bad: ' I hope I'm around when you have a kid JUST like yourself one day".